So this is what I learned from my experience with alcoholics and drug addicts. (Outside of they are broken people and I love them). I guess some back story may help. I ended up in a foster home due to alcohol and drugs and the metal and emotional injury that follows. The foster home dad was an alcoholic and his wife a tea totaller but an evil monster manipulator and emotional abuser, I left as a teen, and continued in the trend of being surrounded by alcoholics and drug abusers. So what is the take away? I saw many good and lovely people with chemical abuse issues, and many monstrous evil. Same with the total abstainers, many evil many good. All broken. Now among those people were also the moderate drinkers, there was a lot less drama and evil among the moderate folks as a general rule. Not to say there weren't any bad people or broken people.
However here is the conclusion. I allow people to participate in my life at their own level, they can be themselves, however I'm in control of my environment, and have my boundaries, when people cross my boundaries I just tell them to back up a bit. If they don't, I send them on until next time. It's easy to say, hey man your drunk go to bed, I'll catch ya later or call tomorrow, or any number of other things.