Judgemental

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Kojikun

Well-known member
Oct 5, 2018
4,658
2,721
113
#1
My mom said the other day I've become more judgmental when I became christian. Unfortunately I get no good answers from Christian's. Either they say do not judge or they sa actually it says we can judge when the plank is out of our eye. Should I be arrogant enough to think I can see clearly? Either way the change I thought happened seems to be a lie.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,317
113
#2
My mom said the other day I've become more judgmental when I became christian. Unfortunately I get no good answers from Christian's. Either they say do not judge or they sa actually it says we can judge when the plank is out of our eye. Should I be arrogant enough to think I can see clearly? Either way the change I thought happened seems to be a lie.
This is why if you look at my profile, where it says if I'm christian, my choice is "unsure". It doesn't mean I'm really unsure, it means I'm not sure I want to be labeled as a christian because I find that a lot of them are very critical and judgemental. That doesn't mean that I don't care if someone sins. It means I don't make it my business to go around judging people. I'm not saying you are like that. I'm just saying that becoming christian does tend to make some people more judgemental. I too am more judgemental in some ways. Fore example, when I was agnostic I used to curse a lot without even thinking about it. Now it bothers me when I hear others do it.

So I guess he takeaway here is.. yeah its normal to be a bit more judgemental once you become a christian, but as long as you aren't going aorund unnecessarily hurting, humiliating or condemning others, you're good.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,725
9,656
113
#3
I guess this would be a really bad time to mention the correct spelling of judgmental... that would seem judgmental... so yeah, I won't mention it. :censored:
 

Kojikun

Well-known member
Oct 5, 2018
4,658
2,721
113
#4
I guess this would be a really bad time to mention the correct spelling of judgmental... that would seem judgmental... so yeah, I won't mention it. :censored:
No that's fine. Theres no E? That's good to know I write so the less errors the better 🧐
 

G00WZ

Senior Member
May 16, 2014
1,318
453
83
38
#5
It depends, usually religious Christians who mostly talk about sin rather than Christ are the most judgmental. New testament says to consider yourselves dead to sin but alive to Christ. Because new testament scripture most of the time is neglected or misunderstood people go right back to the laws of old, and they start beating everyone over the head with the laws. Guess it depends on what content the person is eating, i know a lot of believers who pretty much live in the old testament. I know for myself when i used to be a part of that religious group that's mostly what i used to do. I would point out every little petty thing people did, and because of that i turned people away.
 

Kojikun

Well-known member
Oct 5, 2018
4,658
2,721
113
#6
This is why if you look at my profile, where it says if I'm christian, my choice is "unsure". It doesn't mean I'm really unsure, it means I'm not sure I want to be labeled as a christian because I find that a lot of them are very critical and judgemental. That doesn't mean that I don't care if someone sins. It means I don't make it my business to go around judging people. I'm not saying you are like that. I'm just saying that becoming christian does tend to make some people more judgemental. I too am more judgemental in some ways. Fore example, when I was agnostic I used to curse a lot without even thinking about it. Now it bothers me when I hear others do it.

So I guess he takeaway here is.. yeah its normal to be a bit more judgemental once you become a christian, but as long as you aren't going aorund unnecessarily hurting, humiliating or condemning others, you're good.
Yes I suppose you are correct. I believe the judgment (no E) apply to fellow believers. Jesus uses the term brother if I'm not mistaken.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,725
9,656
113
#7
No that's fine. Theres no E? That's good to know I write so the less errors the better 🧐
Yeah, it's one of the words I always have to look twice at. There's an "e" on the end of "judge" so it feels like by all rights and reason there should be one in "judgmental."

I think somebody was looking for a way to be judgemental when he made that word, just so he could call people on it. :cautious:
 

Kojikun

Well-known member
Oct 5, 2018
4,658
2,721
113
#8
It depends, usually religious Christians who mostly talk about sin rather than Christ are the most judgmental. New testament says to consider yourselves dead to sin but alive to Christ. Because new testament scripture most of the time is neglected or misunderstood people go right back to the laws of old, and they start beating everyone over the head with the laws. Guess it depends on what content the person is eating, i know a lot of believers who pretty much live in the old testament. I know for myself when i used to be a part of that religious group that's mostly what i used to do. I would point out every little petty thing people did, and because of that i turned people away.
It's a delicate balance. You dont want to be apathetic but at the same time not overzealous.
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,834
981
113
34
#9
What change? Careful that people’s guilt over you walking in the light doesn’t cause you to think that you ought to shine any less. When light enters a room darkness retreats. Your lifestyle and righteous living may just convict them of their own wrongdoing and what they see as judging, very well may be righteous judgment. I’ve known people to not do things in my presence, knowing my faith even though they don’t subscribe to the same beliefs.

Some people think because you reject the beer they offered you, that you think you are better than them. It isn’t so, but what you refuse to do may cause them to self reflect.

You don’t need to be as blunt as a street preacher to let them reflect on their life. Walk in the light, and let the peace of righteousness be a mirror for them to compare themselves with. What is the fruit of your life and the fruit of theirs?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,725
9,656
113
#10
Every field has the people who use their skill in the field as a way to put themselves above everybody else.

Take S.T.A.L.K.E.R. for example. Great game, great story. But there are people who take pride in their skill in playing the game - getting through it in record low time, playing the whole game with only pistols, "using the MISERY mod is the only way to play it," "I've put 500 hours in on this game so I think I know more about it than you!"

Judgmental Christians are people who focus so much on how to play the game that they lose sight of the whole reason for playing it. They take pride in being better Christians than everybody else. This requires them to find fault with everybody around them, to support their view of themselves being at the top of the game.

Unfortunately judgmental Christians are the loudest kind of Christians, so people will expect you to be judgmental because that's what they think Christians are. We need muzzles on those dudes. >.>
 

G00WZ

Senior Member
May 16, 2014
1,318
453
83
38
#11
It's a delicate balance. You dont want to be apathetic but at the same time not overzealous.
Yea, its better to educate people on who they are in Christ and not crucify them by pointing their sins. Breathing life into people and telling them truth causes them to change. Change isn't always immediate though, so it takes some patience and wisdom to have faith in God to get that person to where they need to go. I actually had one Christian not too long ago rebuke me for talking to and hanging out with some Muslims. Later she flamed me while having no idea what we were talking about.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#12
I think supporting a friend in sin during her times of struggle and showing encouragement/being available is more effective than hammering the fact that she is living in sin. Of course I think we should tell her that she is going down the wrong path at least once or twice. Jesus never chased someone down because of sin; he told them once or twice to stop sin and repent before moving on. I think we should follow His example.
 

Ghoti2

Well-known member
Nov 8, 2019
469
283
63
#13
This little quiz might be fun for you:)
13 Signs You’re a Judgmental Person
Here are some signs to look out for:
1. You believe that everyone is out to get you.
2. You expect other people to be consistent all the time.
3. You struggle to see beyond a person’s flaws.
4. You easily skip to conclusions.
5. You struggle to tolerate ambiguity and uncertainty.
6. You’re intolerant of people unlike you.
7. You’re generally pessimistic about life.
8. You tend to believe people are either ‘good’ or ‘bad.’
9. You struggle to truly appreciate or see the beauty in others.
10. You have low self-worth.
11. You feel anxious around other people.
12. You’re suspicious and untrusting.
13. You have a strong inner critic who judges you.
Be honest. How many of these signs can you relate to? Also, did you receive any strong or uncomfortable feelings while reading through this list (e.g. anger, defensiveness, shock, fear)? If so, you were probably triggered, meaning that judgmentalism is likely an issue for you.
 
E

EliBeth

Guest
#14
This is why if you look at my profile, where it says if I'm christian, my choice is "unsure". It doesn't mean I'm really unsure, it means I'm not sure I want to be labeled as a christian because I find that a lot of them are very critical and judgemental.
Let me preface this by saying I in no wise desire to pick a fight with you, dear Brother. ❤️ But this saddens me. In my mind bearing the title "Christian" is a high honor. To me, "Christian" means follower of Christ. To think I can be known as a follower of Christ is an incredible privilege. I understand that Christians' actions can often be un-Christlike and that causes some of the onlooking world to lump and label the whole group of proclaiming Christians together as "hypocrites". What a genuinely sad and unfortunate conclusion they have drawn.

Nevertheless, I still gratefully and gladly and humbly proclaim myself a Christian- a believer in the Messiah, Christ. He died for me and I get to bear His name!

Truth be told, there are also Christians around the world who are dying because they courageously refuse to say, "I am Not a Christian." Some Christians, even today, give the last full measure possible, showing the onlooking world exactly what it does mean to be a true and sincere follower of Christ. May God bless these dear, dear souls!

In my mind, the real shame is that we, as Christians, have allowed the privilege of identifying ourselves by our true title to be spoiled, and have not rather been jubilant that we get to be associated with the One we should be all about. I want to call myself a Christian and show what it truly is to be Christ-like, (only) through the power of Almighty God. I don't want to let others' actions or judgements dictate what I call myself.

One last thought: if we are shining the light of Christ and the world notices we are different in a positive way, but we don't call ourselves a Christian, how can they know what (or Who) sets us apart?

Christ's love to you, Brother Zero. 🙂
 
Dec 28, 2019
54
28
18
#15
My mom said the other day I've become more judgmental when I became christian. Unfortunately I get no good answers from Christian's. Either they say do not judge or they sa actually it says we can judge when the plank is out of our eye. Should I be arrogant enough to think I can see clearly? Either way the change I thought happened seems to be a lie.
According to scripture we are to Judge. Righteous judgment.
'Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.' (John 7:24),
' The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment. ' (Ps 37:30);
Read Lk12:56-57,
'Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.§ Open thy mouth, judge righteously, (1Cor 6:2-3),
Prov 24:23, Prov 31:8-9,
' But he that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man. 16 For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. ' (1 Cor 2:15-16),
'& this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment; '(Phil 1:9),..etc

We do not judge according to our opinions, or perceptions. The Spirit of the Lord will give you everything in that moment when judgment comes forward. (Heb 4:12). For example, if you minister to someone about adultery & you repented & clear of that sin, you have pull the mote out of yourself that is what it means. Every day we make judgment calls; what direction we will take, what we will wear, who we will associate with ....etc...
God bless you with more wisdom and understanding.
 
Dec 28, 2019
54
28
18
#16
According to scripture we are to Judge. Righteous judgment.
'Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.' (John 7:24),
' The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment. ' (Ps 37:30);
Read Lk12:56-57,
'Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.§ Open thy mouth, judge righteously, (Prov 31:8-9
' Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters? 3 Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to THIS life? '(1Cor 6:2-3),
'These things also belong to the wise. It is not good to have respect of persons in judgment ' (Prov 24:23),

' But he that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man. 16 For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. ' (1 Cor 2:15-16),
'& this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment; '(Phil 1:9),..etc

We do not judge according to our opinions, or perceptions. The Spirit of the Lord will give you everything in that moment when judgment comes forward. (Heb 4:12). For example, if you minister to someone about adultery & you repented & clear of that sin, you have pull the mote out of yourself that is what it means. Every day we make judgment calls; what direction we will take, what we will wear, who we will associate with ....etc...
God bless you with more wisdom and understanding.
 
Dec 28, 2019
54
28
18
#17
Apologize and disregard the first message. I am new at this and when I edit I forgot to delete the first entry...
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,606
13,863
113
#18
Apologize and disregard the first message. I am new at this and when I edit I forgot to delete the first entry...
Don't worry; we all make mistakes at first. Some of us even make mistakes before we get to first.
 
Apr 12, 2019
243
105
43
#20
If your going to judge, it should be flavored with mercy, since we are all by nature wrath deserving creatures of eternal fire.

We are to be righteous and this will involve judging things, which comes with its offense.

One piece of Advice is this:
John 14:1 Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.

Dont be troubled by people judging you for judging, just make sure your judgment is true and not false and be merciful :)

Btw people will hate you, this is what Jesus said.

So be careful but have faith!