I have this huge, extreme, major, disgust disappoint of men. How do I get rid of this?
I think it’s important to surround yourself with edifying companions who exhibit gentleness, discretion, and grace. They will have an impact on your vernacular and mindset for good or bad. You need people who will speak the truth in love who’ll nudge you towards betterment and not apathy or a rut.
This requires a willingness to listen. Not merely to what is said but the heart behind what’s uttered. Do her words uplift or tear down? Does she celebrate good events with others as well as her own? How does she speak of her companion? Are you privy to his shortcomings and mistakes or does she sing his praises? The temperature of her words for him are the same you’ll receive for yourself and the one you’re with.
You can’t consume spoiled food and expect to go unscathed. In like fashion, you can’t be subjected to jaded people and expect to change. You must align yourself with those who speak honorably and exercise prudence in their disclosures. If she undresses him in the company of friends; she does the same with the rest.
I emphasized this for many reasons. It is a common problem which keeps women mired in muck and nonsense. As for you, the lone way to move past your feelings is to acknowledge their existence and cease to repeat them. Some things should remain unspoken. If you cast the ideas down and steer your mind elsewhere. They’ll cease to come after a while. And you’ll be free.
But you need to be clear on your payoff for its maintenance. What is the benefit of your stance? Who is it keeping at bay and protecting? Beware of the tower lest you become imprisoned with no way out.
You can’t build healthy relationships with barriers raised. You must be willing to let them in at some point. Allowing former connections to take up residence like ghosts and sully your prospects is unwise. Their time has come and gone. Let them go.
And forgive yourself if you were gullible, trusting, mistreated or deceived. Mistakes happen. Own it and move forward. The next needn’t be the last unless you’re stuck. Finally, get in the habit of making a positive statement about the opposite sex on a daily basis. We’re inundated with negative slogans all the time. Don’t buy into the rhetoric. Affirm the good and dispel what’s false.