It could be possible that my take is incorrect but I think it is correct.
Just like you think it's not.
I do have some John Gill stuff in my library but not what you have quoted.
The Gill quote is his from his commentary on John, I didn't make it up. There are more commentary that come to the same conclusion. We must know what Scripture means, not just what it says, or what we think (your claim) that it says.
I am always open to be corrected but am happy to not be. If that's the case it means I'm settled in what I believe to be the truth. Just like you.
I really don't believe you're open to be corrected on this issue.
I am walking with a guy at the moment who is a believer. Baptised him.
Why did you baptize him?
Now he is really struggling.
Severe trauma from the past. Horrific sexual abuse from his step dad.
I never knew my dad, kicked out by mum and fostered into a Christian family only to suffer the same.
Bro, we all have pasts. I'd tell you mine, but not on this thread.
In his head the Bible tells him the God loves him because he is dirty and at fault.
Something is amiss with the above statement. His Gospel understanding seems to be shaky. I also am not certain what you mean by this. How did he conclude this? Who taught him these things?
I just want to reassure people like him that actually God really does love him.
You're not going to convince or reassure a person of something that is God's job, and not yours. It's not mine either.
Taking scripture out of its intent isn’t going to help the guy. God does not love us in the same equality in which he loves the Son. But he did show us how much he loved us while we were yet sinners, Romans 5:6-8.
You’ll probably have better success in explaining to him that God loves him in similitude and order, not in equality, as in the ways Gill explained and described. I’d examine those points with him in Scripture. But again, it is not your job to convince him God loves him. If you're trying to reassure him, it sounds to me he's never been sure about it at all.
Explaining these truths may help, trying to convince him God loves him as much as God loves the Son is going out on a limb.
I don't see any person in heaven before God telling Jesus that the Father loves them just as much as He loves Him. That, quite frankly sounds arrogant if you think about it, it doesn't match up with other Scriptures as far as our attitude of reverence and worship of the Son, and the distinct love the Father has for Him. You're making it out to be that there is no distinction in the love the Father has for the Son than for us. That is the conclusion of saying God's love for us is the exact same equal love he has for the Son. That is unbiblical. That is not the intent of John 17:23.
Furthermore I don’t see any scholarly work or exegesis supporting your view or coming to your conclusion.
How would I counsel him? That he was an enemy of God, Colossians 1:23, Romans 8 &c then tell him God showed his love by sending him to the cross.
Only Christ can cleanse his guilty conscience, Hebrews 10:22. I'd investigate his understanding of the Gospel, repentance, faith, examination of conversion. 2 Corinthians 13:5. I'd concentrate on those things. I think part of another issue is in out reassuring someone they are saved and going to heaven on a profession of faith. The parable of the sower comes to mind.