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I say that we need some new watchdogs to preserve the sanctity of this place. We used to have a Lynx around here but he's now grown fat and lazy. Plus he's eaten all my tuna ..
Oh and lady, you gotta sleep.
Oh and lady, you gotta sleep.
That can only happen if you have had a lot of coffee. So, do you have the world's largest stock of coffee at your home?
K
I'm having some second thoughts about predestination; the ole paradox of human free will. I think the better word might be predeterminism. That's as if to say that if you did have that genie moment when you were able to go back and get a do-over - even knowing what you know now with the wisdom you've collected with time - that the outcome would be the same. I didn't necessarily believe in predestination, but now maybe I'm understanding that it's actually true? Even if I go back and do it all over, I'd end up in the same place. Like - I don't think I'd make the very same mistakes or take the absolute same paths, but the "new" mistakes I'd make and new paths I took would place me back at the same finish.
That's a little disconcerting.... The other day ....who was it ......Rachel20? Anyway, the topic of forks in the road came up; which road was taken was discussed. Now i'm wondering if these paths ALL take us to an equivocal end. Even if we took what we thought of as a chaotic meandering through the woods we would end up in the same place.
Now, if all this were true then this predetermined outcome would HAVE to be planned by God. What other...intelligence would be able to put that together? And if it's the case where this outcome was planned, then my birth, my death, and my very salvation would have to be predestined. That's Calvinist principle isn't it? If it is, then it's also a little depressing. Knowing that nothing I do would change my own course unless the course was designed to change. However - i am convinced I'd be exactly where I am even if I got my wish for a do over.
That's a little disconcerting.... The other day ....who was it ......Rachel20? Anyway, the topic of forks in the road came up; which road was taken was discussed. Now i'm wondering if these paths ALL take us to an equivocal end. Even if we took what we thought of as a chaotic meandering through the woods we would end up in the same place.
Now, if all this were true then this predetermined outcome would HAVE to be planned by God. What other...intelligence would be able to put that together? And if it's the case where this outcome was planned, then my birth, my death, and my very salvation would have to be predestined. That's Calvinist principle isn't it? If it is, then it's also a little depressing. Knowing that nothing I do would change my own course unless the course was designed to change. However - i am convinced I'd be exactly where I am even if I got my wish for a do over.
C
...
Now for the negative... 0_0 How are folks raising their kids these days?! Most of those videos were horrible...
My take? Don't lie (at all) to your kids, and teach them some things like forgiveness, coping, etc... I mean...
PS... Don't listen to talk show hosts and the like...
Now for the negative... 0_0 How are folks raising their kids these days?! Most of those videos were horrible...
My take? Don't lie (at all) to your kids, and teach them some things like forgiveness, coping, etc... I mean...
PS... Don't listen to talk show hosts and the like...
Last night after church we were going for ice cream cones. I was talking to the kids as we pulled into the lot. Mid Sentance, they hop out of the car and take off into the place. I sit and wait. I watch them from a distance. I honk and wave them back to the car then wait. Three Times. Finally I Get out of the car, bark at the kids to get int he car, count with my hand held high for them to see from five down to one. I back out of my parking place and watch their faces go slack... I pull a ways down the lot and into a slot on the opposite side of the lot (back of car to building now instead of front of car to building). I tell them Once more, "Get in the car."
On the way home we talk about Why they hopped out of the car, closing their doors on my words. We talk about setting good examples, and following good examples. We talk about good choices and bad. We talk about respect. We talk about safety. We talk about that there could have been a robbery going on that I was trying to not have them walk in on. We talk about obeying.
And they will likely remember the lessons.
We got home, and there were hugs and I love yous. We talked about how they are good kids. We talked about recent accomplishments and things that make me proud of them. We had snacks, but not ice cream. I still had kids that wanted hugs, kisses, and a song sung to them at bedtime.
It tore me up to postpone ice cream last night (aside from wanting a cone myself). I knew, however, that it could hurt a small amount and I could swallow that and get ice cream and... or I could hurt, do the parent thing, and we could all be better for it, instead of having problems out of my kids for the rest of their lives.
A little discipline now, will serve them a lifetime. Parenting is not an easy job when done right, but it is worth doing right.
M
You know how sometimes you're just sitting there staring off into space for a few minutes, and suddenly there's a whole huge herd of cows running past your window, and you blink and shake your head and think that maybe you reeeeally ought to get more sleep, but when you look again, the cows are still going by like they belong there?
You know?
I really do need to get more sleep.
BUT THERE REALLY WERE COWS!
You know?
I really do need to get more sleep.
BUT THERE REALLY WERE COWS!
I watched a film last night that no Christian circle would recommend (I will refrain from naming the title to avoid any piles of stones that might be thrown for my choice.)
However, I have always been interested in stories that give raw portrayals of the human psyche, and particularly its breakdown, because I am always interested in whether or not God wills us as a society to work on repairing that psyche, or if we have to accept that there is a point of no return, leaving us to somehow adjust to the aftermath.
The movie was a blatant (albeit unrealistic) portrait of what it may take for some human beings to go through in order to understand another person they have judged prematurely. It was also an exploration in how much the human mind can (or cannot) take.
One particular sequence, in which an inmate charms and takes in a stray mouse as his only companion, reminded me of an inmate I used to write. He told me that he had once captured and attempted to domesticate a rat that had wandered into his cell, and it became his best (and only) friend. He kept it on a leash so that it couldn't run away.
It was such a long time ago, I can't remember what happened, if someone took it from him and killed it or if it died by natural means, but somehow, his beloved friend was taken from him and the grief and anguish he experienced and expressed was as great as you or I would have over the loss of a human friend.
I wonder if this is why God makes us go through some of the things that we do--in order to truly understand (and empathize) with other people.
I wish I had someone to talk to right now about everything I'm thinking and feeling. Someone who wouldn't judge me or what I'd have to say, because it would be truly raw and unabashed... Someone who would just let me talk, and would actually have something meaningful (instead of correctional) to say back. Someone who has thought about the same things and wished to share their own thoughts on the matter.
It's this time of year, and these kinds of moments, that I miss my ex-husband the most, because we would have had a raw and honest conversation about this movie without any restraints or judgments.
I remember one year we had strung Christmas lights all over our apartment as if they were stars in the sky, and one night, lying under all those brightly colored lights, we had a long discussion over whether, if someone committed suicide at a public wishing well, once it was cleaned up, would people still come there to make wishes? Of course they would.
In college, a local video rental store was held up and two employees murdered (via execution-style shootings). My boyfriend at the time was an EMT, and while he hadn't been on for that call, his partner had taken the call. When the store reopened (business as usual), we paid a visit and amidst all the students bustling by, my boyfriend pointed out to me all the bloodstains in the carpet that they had been unable to wash out. Because, of course, the main concern was to get the store up and running and back in business again.
It's these times when I miss my ex-husband the most. Because we had conversations I couldn't have with anyone else... raw and most importantly, real, and I didn't have to worry about whether or not he thought I was being Christian enough in what I had to say. He just let me talk, and he had an entire set of his own thoughts to contribute when I was done, because he had already thought about such things as well. I miss that so much.
You can't hide from God what you're thinking or feeling so I've always believed in just spilling it all anyways and then allowing Him to work through it all with you as He wills.
Sometimes though, in order to let it out, you need to have a safe guide to lead the way.
However, I have always been interested in stories that give raw portrayals of the human psyche, and particularly its breakdown, because I am always interested in whether or not God wills us as a society to work on repairing that psyche, or if we have to accept that there is a point of no return, leaving us to somehow adjust to the aftermath.
The movie was a blatant (albeit unrealistic) portrait of what it may take for some human beings to go through in order to understand another person they have judged prematurely. It was also an exploration in how much the human mind can (or cannot) take.
One particular sequence, in which an inmate charms and takes in a stray mouse as his only companion, reminded me of an inmate I used to write. He told me that he had once captured and attempted to domesticate a rat that had wandered into his cell, and it became his best (and only) friend. He kept it on a leash so that it couldn't run away.
It was such a long time ago, I can't remember what happened, if someone took it from him and killed it or if it died by natural means, but somehow, his beloved friend was taken from him and the grief and anguish he experienced and expressed was as great as you or I would have over the loss of a human friend.
I wonder if this is why God makes us go through some of the things that we do--in order to truly understand (and empathize) with other people.
I wish I had someone to talk to right now about everything I'm thinking and feeling. Someone who wouldn't judge me or what I'd have to say, because it would be truly raw and unabashed... Someone who would just let me talk, and would actually have something meaningful (instead of correctional) to say back. Someone who has thought about the same things and wished to share their own thoughts on the matter.
It's this time of year, and these kinds of moments, that I miss my ex-husband the most, because we would have had a raw and honest conversation about this movie without any restraints or judgments.
I remember one year we had strung Christmas lights all over our apartment as if they were stars in the sky, and one night, lying under all those brightly colored lights, we had a long discussion over whether, if someone committed suicide at a public wishing well, once it was cleaned up, would people still come there to make wishes? Of course they would.
In college, a local video rental store was held up and two employees murdered (via execution-style shootings). My boyfriend at the time was an EMT, and while he hadn't been on for that call, his partner had taken the call. When the store reopened (business as usual), we paid a visit and amidst all the students bustling by, my boyfriend pointed out to me all the bloodstains in the carpet that they had been unable to wash out. Because, of course, the main concern was to get the store up and running and back in business again.
It's these times when I miss my ex-husband the most. Because we had conversations I couldn't have with anyone else... raw and most importantly, real, and I didn't have to worry about whether or not he thought I was being Christian enough in what I had to say. He just let me talk, and he had an entire set of his own thoughts to contribute when I was done, because he had already thought about such things as well. I miss that so much.
You can't hide from God what you're thinking or feeling so I've always believed in just spilling it all anyways and then allowing Him to work through it all with you as He wills.
Sometimes though, in order to let it out, you need to have a safe guide to lead the way.
M
I hit a brick wall. Gotta decide. Gotta grow up.
Yeah, really gotta grow up.
If I believe half of the things I say I believe, then it's time to trust God to do what I claim to have faith He will do.
I'm tired of casting safety nets, only to get tangled up in them. I wonder, if I remove them...will God let me fall?
Yeah, really gotta grow up.
If I believe half of the things I say I believe, then it's time to trust God to do what I claim to have faith He will do.
I'm tired of casting safety nets, only to get tangled up in them. I wonder, if I remove them...will God let me fall?
K
Probably gets a little lonelier when nobody answers back, huh? Well, while you're ....digging up bones (exhuming things better left alone, as Randy Travis would say) I can say that sometimes those spots of blood in the carpet or bullet holes serve as a kind of talisman of sorts. One time - and I couldn't have been 5 or 6 - my uncle and a couple of cousins and I were at a county fair. I don't think it was a state fair - more like one of those traveling fairs with that thick rich aroma of popcorn and cow mature in the air. By and large though it was exciting. Long trailers up on landing gear with the hum of generators overplayed by that winding carousel music on a hot summer Friday night. Just a lot of activity.
We were siting at this long U shaped concession stand and it was huge. The bar probably seated 50 or more. This big ole guy with one of those too small paper hats on his head (you wonder how it sits up there) would use the same tongs he'd been scratching his sweaty back with to dunk inside a steaming vat of brown looking lake water and fish out a bluish red hot dog, slap it on a bun and give it to you in this paper jon boat looking tub with french fires. And it was the best tasting thing I ever ate. Left a huge oil spill big enough to kill a duck.
Then all of a sudden, the whole thing - everything - just stopped. I don't really remember a noise, but there was one. My ears had that high pitched tinsel sound, loud and then fading followed by a sight you just happened to be looking at that moment that sticks to your memory for life. The humming and the carousel music slowly resounding while it all just stopped! The talking, the music, the motion. It's like the vat of lake water in a stainless steel pot was still boiling (the thing I happened to be looking at) but all else was in molecular stasis. Then a woman screamed.
It was simple enough what happened. A man took the wrong woman to the fair that evening and her jealous husband came up behind him and shot him in the back of the head. He was sitting at the other end of the concession bar and slid off the stool and out of view. I never saw a thing. I don't remember hearing a thing. My uncle did and he offered himself as a witness but was never called I'm assuming because there was about 650 other witnesses and the husband just waited at the bar till the police came and confessed everything.
Anyway, the bullet's travel was highly studied and talked about and contested for some time to come because it put a hole in the bar top and they never fixed it. It became a side show sort of.
Anyhow - I had often wondered the significance of that hole. Did it hold a special power? No - not really. Just a scar. Just a memory of a few kids that never saw a thing.
Well, does that help any?
We were siting at this long U shaped concession stand and it was huge. The bar probably seated 50 or more. This big ole guy with one of those too small paper hats on his head (you wonder how it sits up there) would use the same tongs he'd been scratching his sweaty back with to dunk inside a steaming vat of brown looking lake water and fish out a bluish red hot dog, slap it on a bun and give it to you in this paper jon boat looking tub with french fires. And it was the best tasting thing I ever ate. Left a huge oil spill big enough to kill a duck.
Then all of a sudden, the whole thing - everything - just stopped. I don't really remember a noise, but there was one. My ears had that high pitched tinsel sound, loud and then fading followed by a sight you just happened to be looking at that moment that sticks to your memory for life. The humming and the carousel music slowly resounding while it all just stopped! The talking, the music, the motion. It's like the vat of lake water in a stainless steel pot was still boiling (the thing I happened to be looking at) but all else was in molecular stasis. Then a woman screamed.
It was simple enough what happened. A man took the wrong woman to the fair that evening and her jealous husband came up behind him and shot him in the back of the head. He was sitting at the other end of the concession bar and slid off the stool and out of view. I never saw a thing. I don't remember hearing a thing. My uncle did and he offered himself as a witness but was never called I'm assuming because there was about 650 other witnesses and the husband just waited at the bar till the police came and confessed everything.
Anyway, the bullet's travel was highly studied and talked about and contested for some time to come because it put a hole in the bar top and they never fixed it. It became a side show sort of.
Anyhow - I had often wondered the significance of that hole. Did it hold a special power? No - not really. Just a scar. Just a memory of a few kids that never saw a thing.
Well, does that help any?
Ken,
Thank you so much for your post. I really do appreciate it. I'm debating on whether or not to post some of what I'm really thinking about. It would take a couple of pages to do so... I will try to make this short.
In the movie I watched, a man is imprisoned for 20 years by an unknown captor in a private institution. During this time, he is framed for his ex-wife's murder and his toddler daughter is adopted into another family. His detention is completely devoid of human contact and during this time, he proceeds to: draw a face on a pillowcase in his own blood as a companion; hallucinates a person who isn't really there as some sort of human connection; tries to commit suicide but is prevented form doing so; befriends a mouse and her litter of babies as a source of living contacts... only to have them served to him as his dinner on a covered silver plate by his captor.
One day he is suddenly let go, and while he gets his revenge on many who ran the facility where he was held, he also falls in love with a woman young enough to be his daughter and discovers who his captor really was. Many years ago, when he was young, he witnessed an act of abuse between two family members and began a rumor that resulted in the family leaving the country. The father eventually attempted to kill every member of the family and himself, but his son survived, and lived to be the one acting out this revenge on the man who started the rumor.
The main character of this story had made a judgment on this family and indirectly ruined them. Now, of course what was going on was horribly wrong, but what stands out so strongly was that he labeled and condemned them without an ounce of compassion or empathy, which is something all of us do to others around us.
And then you come to find out... that the person who has done all this to him was seeking revenge, yes. But he was also showing him what it was like to be in that situation. You see, the woman young enough to be his daughter whom he has become very involved with... actually IS his daughter, the one person he had chosen to live for during his incarceration, and now he was faced with unknowingly having an inappropriate relationship with her. Which is exactly what he had judged this family for and talked about them mercilessly instead of trying to lend any aid to their situation. The film concluded with this man breaking off all contact with his daughter for good, and as his own punishment, chooses to go back into solitary confinement, presumably, for the rest of his life.
This was the best movie, by far, that I have seen in years, if not ever.
My mind was stretched in all sorts of directions, because many of the inmates I had written had been through all the same situations.
But the resounding theme this film left me with was: What if God put us all into the situations for which we so quickly judge and condemn other people?
Thank you so much for your post. I really do appreciate it. I'm debating on whether or not to post some of what I'm really thinking about. It would take a couple of pages to do so... I will try to make this short.
In the movie I watched, a man is imprisoned for 20 years by an unknown captor in a private institution. During this time, he is framed for his ex-wife's murder and his toddler daughter is adopted into another family. His detention is completely devoid of human contact and during this time, he proceeds to: draw a face on a pillowcase in his own blood as a companion; hallucinates a person who isn't really there as some sort of human connection; tries to commit suicide but is prevented form doing so; befriends a mouse and her litter of babies as a source of living contacts... only to have them served to him as his dinner on a covered silver plate by his captor.
One day he is suddenly let go, and while he gets his revenge on many who ran the facility where he was held, he also falls in love with a woman young enough to be his daughter and discovers who his captor really was. Many years ago, when he was young, he witnessed an act of abuse between two family members and began a rumor that resulted in the family leaving the country. The father eventually attempted to kill every member of the family and himself, but his son survived, and lived to be the one acting out this revenge on the man who started the rumor.
The main character of this story had made a judgment on this family and indirectly ruined them. Now, of course what was going on was horribly wrong, but what stands out so strongly was that he labeled and condemned them without an ounce of compassion or empathy, which is something all of us do to others around us.
And then you come to find out... that the person who has done all this to him was seeking revenge, yes. But he was also showing him what it was like to be in that situation. You see, the woman young enough to be his daughter whom he has become very involved with... actually IS his daughter, the one person he had chosen to live for during his incarceration, and now he was faced with unknowingly having an inappropriate relationship with her. Which is exactly what he had judged this family for and talked about them mercilessly instead of trying to lend any aid to their situation. The film concluded with this man breaking off all contact with his daughter for good, and as his own punishment, chooses to go back into solitary confinement, presumably, for the rest of his life.
This was the best movie, by far, that I have seen in years, if not ever.
My mind was stretched in all sorts of directions, because many of the inmates I had written had been through all the same situations.
But the resounding theme this film left me with was: What if God put us all into the situations for which we so quickly judge and condemn other people?
You've probably heard the saying "don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his moccasins." That means unless you have lived that person's life, felt their pain, and thought their thoughts, then you cant ever truly know what kind of battle their going through. My situation is different from yours, or anyone else's. You don't know my trials, nor do I know yours. This man you spoke of started a rumor that ruined a family's reputation. That is what rumors are intended to do: ruin people, make them look bad in other people's eyes. It's strange how we see other people's sins as way more evil than our own, even though all sin is the exact same in God's eyes. At least this man made a good decision when he decided to go back to jail, rather than keep having an inappropriate relationship with his daughter.
I actually love thinking about this topic.
I don't think things are as cut-and-dried as we try to make them out to be. I mean, as humans we like to try to define and classify things however we can, so I very much believe in Calvinism and predestination, but I'm not sure it's as simple as the five points make it.
A couple of years ago I heard a Tim Keller sermon called Does God Control Everything? that radically expanded my view of this topic. You should take a listen to it sometime. Basically in the sermon he argues that God does not work in spite of our decisions, but He actually works through them--the good, the bad, and the ugly. He illustrates this by describing how the Watergate Scandal ultimately led to him planting a church in New York City (such a cool illustration). This radically blew up my view of God because it forces you to think of God as operating in and out of time. Just try to imagine how God has a plan for something good to happen and Him working in and through the decisions of random people in random places to accomplish it while those people really are making those decisions actively and consciously. It's mind-blowing! It paints God in such an infinite light to think of Him that way.
I think Calvinism is depressing if God isn't good. Knowing that He is good in the purest sense of the word and that He is working out His perfect plan for our joy and His glory, though, actually makes it comforting to me. It means no one can thwart His plans and that He is perfectly in control
I don't think things are as cut-and-dried as we try to make them out to be. I mean, as humans we like to try to define and classify things however we can, so I very much believe in Calvinism and predestination, but I'm not sure it's as simple as the five points make it.
A couple of years ago I heard a Tim Keller sermon called Does God Control Everything? that radically expanded my view of this topic. You should take a listen to it sometime. Basically in the sermon he argues that God does not work in spite of our decisions, but He actually works through them--the good, the bad, and the ugly. He illustrates this by describing how the Watergate Scandal ultimately led to him planting a church in New York City (such a cool illustration). This radically blew up my view of God because it forces you to think of God as operating in and out of time. Just try to imagine how God has a plan for something good to happen and Him working in and through the decisions of random people in random places to accomplish it while those people really are making those decisions actively and consciously. It's mind-blowing! It paints God in such an infinite light to think of Him that way.
I think Calvinism is depressing if God isn't good. Knowing that He is good in the purest sense of the word and that He is working out His perfect plan for our joy and His glory, though, actually makes it comforting to me. It means no one can thwart His plans and that He is perfectly in control
Sometimes, and more so lately, I legitimately feel I'm going to have a heart attack or anxiety attack from stress. I'm 24.
The past few weeks, my heart will sometimes flutter/skip a beat/feel weird. And not the "My crush is looking at me" heart flutter, the kind of heart skip when you hear bad news that makes your stomach drop. It's been happening multiple times a day this past week. It only lasts for a split second. I think it's related to when I'm thinking about the upcoming changes. I'm not trying to be anxious or overthink it, they just cross my mind.
I've also been tensing up, my upper shoulders and chest muscles are sore. Or maybe I'm sleeping wrong, or sitting wrong at my desk. Probably a combination.
I have to tell myself to breathe. I make myself do breathing exercises. It's like I'm constantly on edge. I hate this. I'm not usually this way. I am pretty good at taking things in stride. I think I've just taken so much in stride over these past few years and now my steps are faltering.
Or maybe I'm really not taking things in stride at all and I only think I am and its affecting my body.
The past few weeks, my heart will sometimes flutter/skip a beat/feel weird. And not the "My crush is looking at me" heart flutter, the kind of heart skip when you hear bad news that makes your stomach drop. It's been happening multiple times a day this past week. It only lasts for a split second. I think it's related to when I'm thinking about the upcoming changes. I'm not trying to be anxious or overthink it, they just cross my mind.
I've also been tensing up, my upper shoulders and chest muscles are sore. Or maybe I'm sleeping wrong, or sitting wrong at my desk. Probably a combination.
I have to tell myself to breathe. I make myself do breathing exercises. It's like I'm constantly on edge. I hate this. I'm not usually this way. I am pretty good at taking things in stride. I think I've just taken so much in stride over these past few years and now my steps are faltering.
Or maybe I'm really not taking things in stride at all and I only think I am and its affecting my body.