Talking to Men - Women of opposite sex

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BrotherMike

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
#161
Jan 8, 2018
1,617
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#161
Heart_Melody said:
I read this book on how to Catch you a Man and get Married in 9 steps.
And it was super stupid of course - but some of the stuff seems to be correct.

One of the things it said was
Ask the man ALL the questions when your having dinner - and let him talk all night long. when he remembers the night he will realize how much fun he's had because he just talked about HIMSELF all night long. LOL He don't wanna listen to you.

:ROFL:
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Dudette!!! I have had a lot of instances I ask a lot of questions to get to know her, she answers them and doesn’t ask questions back. Its frustrating! I think we need a topic talking to women lol
 
BrotherMike

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
#163
Jan 8, 2018
1,617
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#163
Heart_Melody said:
YOU ARE A KEEPER!
I am honestly crying 3 seconds into the beginning of the movie because I read WAY too much into it and movie music gets me in my feels all the time - even in boy action movies lol
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Haha well I don’t cry 3 seconds into the movie but I totally understand all the feels the movie could have... maybe cause I’m sensitive.
 
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Heart_Melody

Guest
#166
#166
my dad cried at a middle school play "the frog and the pricess" when the princess kissed the frog XD so you good
 
TheArtist

TheArtist

Well-known member
#167
Dec 29, 2019
521
298
63
www.etsy.com
#167
ArtsieSteph said:
In all honesty I think it goes that you need to have common interests, and be willing to learn about the other person’s interests too.

Like I’m a gal that likes Jane Austen period romances (“girly films”) but I also like Godzilla, which is more of a “guy film” I guess.
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which Godzilla and I guess you could call it a guy movie I never really thought romantic as girl movies or action as guy movies. I enjoy both romantic and action movies I take after my Dad who loved a good romantic movie and would replay the ending of certain movies more than once and you be seeing him tear up just a little bit.
 
ArtsieSteph

ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
#168
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
1,321
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Arizona
#168
TheArtist said:
which Godzilla and I guess you could call it a guy movie I never really thought romantic as girl movies or action as guy movies. I enjoy both romantic and action movies I take after my Dad who loved a good romantic movie and would replay the ending of certain movies more than once and you be seeing him tear up just a little bit.
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Awwww my dad was like that too :3 At least with like You've Got Mail. Hmmmm which Godzilla.....maybe the new one? King of Monsters. If not the 2000's ish one would be hilarious to laugh at. The first US 2010's Godzilla was pretty neat too.
 
TheArtist

TheArtist

Well-known member
#169
Dec 29, 2019
521
298
63
www.etsy.com
#169
ArtsieSteph said:
Awwww my dad was like that too :3 At least with like You've Got Mail. Hmmmm which Godzilla.....maybe the new one? King of Monsters. If not the 2000's ish one would be hilarious to laugh at. The first US 2010's Godzilla was pretty neat too.
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I love you've got mail and sleeping in Seattle a good one to and then there is L.A story which is a good romantic comedy and i love how that movie ends. you can't help but get goosebumps watching the ending of that movie. I have a list of romantic movies i could list and and of course some good action movies to lol
 
melita916

melita916

Senior Member
#170
Aug 12, 2011
10,464
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#170
Gladiator is one of my fave movies!!! And Braveheart!!! And 300!!!!

I don’t like chick flicks so I’m not invited to the party lol
 
M

mlssufan01

Member
#172
Feb 9, 2014
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#172
out of curiosity, do you ever place boundaries on a guy or break off a friendship with a guy BECAUSE you are attracted to him? Or perhaps it was a relationship few would approve of?

To answer your question of flirting/approaching men...technically speaking...a good man will approach you first; if a man is not sol bold as initiate conversation, then either he may not be interested, or he lacks confidence; in either case I do not see the long-term sustainability of the relationship.
 
Didymous

Didymous

Senior Member
#173
Feb 22, 2018
5,047
2,101
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#173
I've never had a problem talking to ladies-getting some of them to talk back is a problem sometimes. :cool:
 
M

mlssufan01

Member
#174
Feb 9, 2014
168
35
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#174
BrotherMike said:
Dudette!!! I have had a lot of instances I ask a lot of questions to get to know her, she answers them and doesn’t ask questions back. Its frustrating! I think we need a topic talking to women lol
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Generally speaking, it's not so much the topics; but how you appear in frame--how confident are you? Do you maintain eye contact? Are you bold in your convictions (i.e. sharing the Gospel)? All these will be effective in attracting a woman; but be discerning in the woman you allow in your life. The more confident and successful you are; the more women will try to work their way into your life; if you are already in a relationship you have to nix those ladies from the bunch so as to remain faithful to the one you're with; whether gf or spouse.
 
R

Ruby123

Guest
#175
#175
TheArtist said:
I love you've got mail and sleeping in Seattle a good one to and then there is L.A story which is a good romantic comedy and i love how that movie ends. you can't help but get goosebumps watching the ending of that movie. I have a list of romantic movies i could list and and of course some good action movies to lol
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Well I watched a movie from the past called Sabrina with Harrison Ford and I'm not sure who the female was?? It was great. I have seen it come on TV several times but never sat down and watched it. As there was nothing else on at the time I did sit down and watched it and really enjoyed it. (y)
 
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Heart_Melody

Guest
#176
#176
mlssufan01 said:
out of curiosity, do you ever place boundaries on a guy or break off a friendship with a guy BECAUSE you are attracted to him? Or perhaps it was a relationship few would approve of?

To answer your question of flirting/approaching men...technically speaking...a good man will approach you first; if a man is not sol bold as initiate conversation, then either he may not be interested, or he lacks confidence; in either case I do not see the long-term sustainability of the relationship.
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You are probably right :)

And my biggest boundaries are that the absolutely must be Christian. And another point I have which is important to me (once you are going out) is that I want the guy to be like "Hey these are physical boundaries and here is how I will protect you and me from doing sin stuff."

Because any christian I have been with has wanted to do things that were not biiblical and I end up breaking up. And over the years that second point has become a big issue for me.

Also - I don't break off an engagement if I am friends with someone - it's trying to talk to a person whom I don't know but am interested in thats hard for me.
Ideally I would just have to work with that person - side by side - preferably in a situation where we both are serving the Lord, and then it would come about naturally. But when I volunteer there aren't any men my age around. Or single men.
 
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Heart_Melody

Guest
#177
#177
mlssufan01 said:
Generally speaking, it's not so much the topics; but how you appear in frame--how confident are you? Do you maintain eye contact? Are you bold in your convictions (i.e. sharing the Gospel)? All these will be effective in attracting a woman; but be discerning in the woman you allow in your life. The more confident and successful you are; the more women will try to work their way into your life; if you are already in a relationship you have to nix those ladies from the bunch so as to remain faithful to the one you're with; whether gf or spouse.
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I find activities helpful on dates - in case you are shy and don't know what to say - you can focus on Mini Gold and having fun and that eases the tension.
Dinner - first dates initially to me are a bit stressful... :)
 
M

mlssufan01

Member
#178
Feb 9, 2014
168
35
28
#178
Heart_Melody said:
I find activities helpful on dates - in case you are shy and don't know what to say - you can focus on Mini Gold and having fun and that eases the tension.
Dinner - first dates initially to me are a bit stressful... :)
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lol 100% agree....I try to find creative ways to build relationship....I've found those bowling/arcade/laser tag places to be pretty good...but my favorite is escape room...though one time I asked a girl out and she asked if she could bring her "friend" who turned out to be her boyfriend....Thankfully I had friends join us as a backup plan to avoid the awkwardness.

As for the volunteering...that's a really tough one...Right now I'm in a new town and looking for a new church (which has been hampered for obvious reasons), but a in one church I was deacon and a youth worker, also while working a fulltime job that often required overtime, as well as a part time job....and that was just to provide for myself. Now imagine the expectation from the church that man must be provider for his wife and children, if he has any. You can begin to see this overwhelming burden placed on us in a money hungry, competitive, cutthroat society. Add the 10% tithe expected to that. It's mentally and physically draining...and then also we must have time to socialize with our families. I can barely do all this on my own...I don't know how the married guys do it. But this should answer why so few guys are involved with volunteer efforts...simply put they probably feel it does not contribute to their purpose of providing, and in many cases, hinders it; not to mention females are often the ones with the nurturing spirit inclined to volunteer without pay...not that a guy can't, I just don't think we do it intuitively.
 
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Heart_Melody

Guest
#179
#179
mlssufan01 said:
lol 100% agree....I try to find creative ways to build relationship....I've found those bowling/arcade/laser tag places to be pretty good...but my favorite is escape room...though one time I asked a girl out and she asked if she could bring her "friend" who turned out to be her boyfriend....Thankfully I had friends join us as a backup plan to avoid the awkwardness.

As for the volunteering...that's a really tough one...Right now I'm in a new town and looking for a new church (which has been hampered for obvious reasons), but a in one church I was deacon and a youth worker, also while working a fulltime job that often required overtime, as well as a part time job....and that was just to provide for myself. Now imagine the expectation from the church that man must be provider for his wife and children, if he has any. You can begin to see this overwhelming burden placed on us in a money hungry, competitive, cutthroat society. Add the 10% tithe expected to that. It's mentally and physically draining...and then also we must have time to socialize with our families. I can barely do all this on my own...I don't know how the married guys do it. But this should answer why so few guys are involved with volunteer efforts...simply put they probably feel it does not contribute to their purpose of providing, and in many cases, hinders it; not to mention females are often the ones with the nurturing spirit inclined to volunteer without pay...not that a guy can't, I just don't think we do it intuitively.
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Absolutely! I think being in a relationship can be hard - and will be hard - but Imagine how much better it would be if you did have a like minded person by your side. A person to work with you to make ends meet- and when things turn to kids and all that - it will work itself out - it always does. Because parents will make it happen!

So I think mostly ALL YOU MEN need to go volunteer so we girls can get to know you lol :)

So where did you move to? I am just now applying to lot's of minstrels in the Atlanta area where I moved from a year ago - but now feel like I am ready to return back to. Fingers crossed any or some will answer back with positions they are able to fill. I know God will make a way. It is so thrilling - because I have to find a place and I don't want to fall back on my crutches - namely some waitress Jobs I know will hire me back if I ask.
I want to be self sufficient and be able to do what I love from that place begin buiding ties to my family again. Living with family is stressful for me - because I did not grow up with them at all and I don't feel I have a relationship or connection to them and so I constantly try to earn their approval. And I am not who I am around them in fear they won't like who I am.

But I believe God's cured me of that now... We will see! Pray for me! haha
 
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Heart_Melody

Guest
#180
#180
mlssufan01 said:
lol 100% agree....I try to find creative ways to build relationship....I've found those bowling/arcade/laser tag places to be pretty good...but my favorite is escape room...though one time I asked a girl out and she asked if she could bring her "friend" who turned out to be her boyfriend....Thankfully I had friends join us as a backup plan to avoid the awkwardness.
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OHHHH all those sound awesome! I've yet to go to an escape room ;)
I like hiking, or kayaking and arcade games and laser tagging are amazing fun! Fishing even - I get excited when a fish bites but I don't want to bait the hook and I don't really want to eat the fish lol
 
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