My CC Encounters

[Magenta]

Out of all of the insults my question is what is "eyelash flapping"? That doesn't even sound like a good insult to anything really.
I guess when they ran out of things to say they just started making things up... Either that, or they just really don't like the way you blink.

The point is, that some of those who disagree with others degenerate quite quickly into rhetoric deliberately intended to insult and cause offense. Ad homs are also a logical fallacy. The ignore option comes in quite handy in such cases because there is not much chance for honest dialogue with a person who refuses to admit when they are wrong.

 

[Magenta]

The prose poem "Desiderata" was quite a popular piece in my time

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

written by Max Ehrmann in 1927

 

[Lanolin]

Is the BDF not moderated?

I have been there on and off lately but just been posting in other forums.

I find if I dont have anything to add or ask I just dont post, its not very edifying to just post anything in every thread. IF someones is being rude or nasty, just place them on ignore and report them. Thats the only way to stop that kind of behaviour (and also, pray for them)

Dont make another thread about the other thread. If you got something to say thats not on the topic you make another thread, be polite and dont derails someone elses thread.

I would find it very rude if someone just changed the topic and it started being about something completely different, when any new comers are looking for threads on the title thread topic. Most of us have lots of other things to do then spend every waking hour on a forum.

And important thing is, be appropriate. If its a serious topic dont treat it as a joke. And if its humourous then relax. I think people get most offended when they arent listened to. And for some people they may be joking about something but someone else doesnt know they are joking. Sure way to offend someone.

For example someones just died tragically and then someone else who doesnt even know them makes a joke about it. Please dont do that.

 

[Whispered]

I don’t care, it’s just interesting to observe how people are acting here compared to the real world.

This is mighty different than the off-line or real world, isn't it? Here we don't see one another when we type or read someone's remarks to us or others.

Think about a relative comparison as pertains to being anonymous or masked when exchanging with others.
For instance, robbers wearing a mask are fully intent on taking money from a store cashier. They're brazen because they know they won't be identified, known, due to the disguise that covers their real identity. Would they risk that offense if there were no mask available?

On the Internet people are hidden from view and are masked by a screen name that likely isn't their real name at all. Therefore, who they really are is unknown. Some people thrive in that anonymity. They exercise their worst behaviors in forums or chat rooms even because they know no one, even if it were their neighbor in the house down the street that they were insulting, knows who they are.
Some people take advantage of the anonymity factor so they can let go and be who they really are. Because that would find little tolerance off-line in the real world.

Also, as I checked around after reading your OP, I am now reminded of the wisdom our Lord Jesus gave the men who were want to stone Mary of Magdala for her sins. They judged her for her perceived wrongs and yet they themselves were not spotless.
He who is without sin let him cast the first stone.

You've cast yours in making your upset toward certain members public. However, are you one who has not spoken as you accuse others of having done toward you? In other words, you speak of their sins and cast this stone of accusation in public, without naming names, but have you posted as one who has not exampled what she claims against others here?

We will never change someone else. Their faults are not in our control to alter or heal. All we're responsible for in matters of growth and change as pertains to our wrongs or failings, is ourselves.
In other words, you can ignore those who hurt you. But you live with yourself. And if you have hurt people you should never ignore that.
Just my thought.

 

[Whispered]

Out of all of the insults my question is what is "eyelash flapping"? That doesn't even sound like a good insult to anything really.
I guess when they ran out of things to say they just started making things up... Either that, or they just really don't like the way you blink.

It does bring to mind a funny visual though. Eyelashes flapping.
And I agree, it has no value as anything remotely related to an insult. I would think the one using that phrase intending it to be insulting is very young or very immature to think such a remark would mean something to anyone but themselves.
Of course, that anonymity factor on the Net being ever present, it would be a real hoot if the person to whom one addressed such a remark suffered Alopecia. Then the joke would be on the one that accused that person of eyelash flapping.

 

[Mezame83]

I'm a woman...I've heard the eyelash flapping thing before, too...Pretty sure this is meaning...You're just a woman so what could you know, listen and learn, or speak when spoken too, etc. or something like that

Well that's rude. Never heard it myself but at least now i know what it means.

 

[Mezame83]

acting here compared to the real world

I think this is a reason why some people find it acceptable to call others names, they don't care how they make the person feel because they don't actually know them and they don't take time to get to know the person, they just sit behind their screen sprouting off whatever insults they see fit.
When i see it, i just pray, you just never know what people are going through/have been through.

 

[Whispered]

I think this is a reason why some people find it acceptable to call others names, they don't care how they make the person feel because they don't actually know them and they don't take time to get to know the person, they just sit behind their screen sprouting off whatever insults they see fit.
When i see it, i just pray, you just never know what people are going through/have been through.

I think your advice is very good here. We can forget that those who call us names or imply an insult through catch phrases are actually sinning.
And if they hold our Lord's name sacred, they are willfully committing a sin against a sister or brother whom they speak to in such ways.
The Book of Philippians chapter 4 verses 11 to 13 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in WHATSOEVER state I am, therewith to be CONTENT. I know both how to be ABASED, and I know how to ABOUND: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to SUFFER need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

It does bring to mind a funny visual though. Eyelashes flapping.
And I agree, it has no value as anything remotely related to an insult. I would think the one using that phrase intending it to be insulting is very young or very immature to think such a remark would mean something to anyone but themselves.
Of course, that anonymity factor on the Net being ever present, it would be a real hoot if the person to whom one addressed such a remark suffered Alopecia. Then the joke would be on the one that accused that person of eyelash flapping.

Actually the notion is more of flirtiness. Or could even be thought of as using seduction as a form of manipulation.

"Batting eyelashes" is how I always heard the phrase. And it's not a common phrase anymore so it's actually more likely someone older.

 

[Whispered]

Actually the notion is more of flirtiness. Or could even be thought of as using seduction as a form of manipulation.

"Batting eyelashes" is how I always heard the phrase. And it's not a common phrase anymore so it's actually more likely someone older.

I thought them to be quite young because they may have heard the older phrase, batting eyelashes, and failing to recall that just went with, eyelash flapping.
In any case, is it really all that important?
Cutting remarks toward someone, especially in a forum where the spirit of Christ shares with us, as we recall His teaching, where two or more are gathered, is unnecessary and belies the hurting that the one delivering the cutting remarks feels in their own life. That's how I see rude remarks and especially on a one dimensional platform like a discussion board on the Internet.
Exercise those demons! As my bestie says when they get hit a time or two with mean words on the sites she visits.
Sometimes people throw hate filled words because to them they're like physical slaps meant to impact the person they're directed at.
Anything just to feel like they've "hit" someone in some way. And sadly, some people use sarcasm, hate filled words, or resort to name calling to do just that.
They must be very sad and angry in their everyday. God be with them.

If someone wants to call me names, proceed. I like labels that make me smile. Cheesecake, Eclair, Lasagna, Ferrari, Lamborghini, million tax free cash, beach house Maui.

 

[morefaithrequired]

Ive been called the Anti Christ. Maybe I was. 😁

 

[morefaithrequired]

I am wondering how much influence Twitter has on other social media forums. Insulting is staple there. The default style of communication.

 

[morefaithrequired]

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 21, 2019

DEALING WITH INSULTS AND LIES

Jesus always spoke the truth. He encouraged people to follow Him because He is the way, the truth, and the life. He said some things that are very difficult to do and do not seem to fit into the category of comfort and encouragement.

Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. (1 Peter 3:9 NIV)

Does Jesus really mean this? We see examples of situations like road rage and know that quick-flash anger lives in most of us and can be triggered very quickly. Isn’t it enough that we don’t act violently in response to what others say and do or spread vicious rumors about them to others? Not only does the Bible teach us to not react and return evil for evil but it challenges us even further when we are taught to find a way to bless the one who is speaking badly about us.

Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. (Matthew 5:11 NIV)

As Jesus hung on the cross, He blessed and forgave those who put Him there, even while they were busy mocking Him and making fun of Him. Jesus knew it was better to focus His actions on fulfilling what God wanted Him to do rather than be distracted by the sinful words or behaviours of others.

While it may be a challenge, it is true that God will help us when we choose to stop the cycle of insults with kindness. This does not mean that we smile while our fists are clenched. It does mean that we give up the desire for revenge. We let God speak truth to our hearts and give us peace within so the insults and evil lies of others wash off us like oil on a non-stick pan surface. When we do this, we can then ask others to tell us what their problem is and listen long as they offer an explanation. Sometimes it is the right thing to simply walk away in peace and pray a blessing on the wounded angry person.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I can’t imagine not insulting someone back when they insult me but I’m willing to do things Your way. With Your help I will do my best to bless someone who, either in the past or even today, speaks evil to me or about me. Remove all lies from my mind and heal my wounded heart and help me to see myself and others as You see them. Amen.

(co; Partner in Hope.)

mi

Thank you for sharing. I to have been called a gay lover because I don't see gays as being any worse than adulterers, whore mongers or habitual liars. But I've also been called a white hater, a radical fundamentalist, a troll and many times a Liberal. Well if you'd consider some of the greatest presidents we ever had, James Monroe, Abraham Lincoln, and F. D. Roosevelt liberals I'll admit to that. Oh and a drunkard because I identify as a recovering alcoholic. I guess the don't know that alcoholism is a combination of a long recognized biological disease as well as a certified mental illness. we can get it by over indulgence like maybe diabetes but after it crosses the line long term recovery relies on abstinence we can't go back to social or recreational drinking again. Abstinence is a treatment not a cure.

In fact I've also been told that my attitude about sexuality is unfit for the young that may read some of my posts. My own children had more sex education at 15 years old, than I did at 50!

might be interested in private messaging you. cant afford subscription if you would like to start one. otherwise i will use your recovery thread.

 

[tasha66]

In my line of work, I get insulted all the time (& physically attacked at times). I wouldn't even repeat some of the insults, as they are not fit for anybody to hear/read. I EXPECT to get insulted, sworn at & possibly physically assaulted at work - but I go back because I know the people I care for are ill. I love my job despite it's pitfalls.
We all want revenge in some form or other when we perceive someone hurting us - that is natural. But when I come home from work after a REALLY bad night, I shrug it off most times, or write in my journal. A long, hot shower, a cuppa & a wee meal doesn't hurt either.
I guess what I'm saying is - water off a duck's back. If you aren't any of those things people have said to you, why do you care? If you feel that strongly about it all, go back onto those sites, or contact the people involved, and explain to them the way you feel - get it off your chest so to speak. Or complain to the moderators here to have those people contacted, and possibly banned. If it bothers you that much, take some positive action - or let it slide. I guess when we go on the internet, we have to expect some of that. But I'm sorry this has happened to you.
I too was also baffled as to why someone would say 'eyelash flapping'. Were they referring to the pic accompanying your name??