Do you think finding a spouse is more difficult now than in the past?
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I don't think finding someone wanting to marry you is a problem, but whether YOU actually want to marry them is another.
In the olden days everyone had arranged marriages. You got engaged when you were a child and as soon as you hit puberty you were married off. What else could you do. It was a way of not having so many mouths to feed. Although falling pregnant meant you could have more child workers if they were boys.
People that don't marry are were bachelors and they were smart and studied/scholars. Women who didn't marry spun (that was why they were called spinsters) and were able to make the bayeux tapestry. Or something.
But not too many people were smart enough to study or sew tapestries. lol
In the olden days everyone had arranged marriages. You got engaged when you were a child and as soon as you hit puberty you were married off. What else could you do. It was a way of not having so many mouths to feed. Although falling pregnant meant you could have more child workers if they were boys.
People that don't marry are were bachelors and they were smart and studied/scholars. Women who didn't marry spun (that was why they were called spinsters) and were able to make the bayeux tapestry. Or something.
But not too many people were smart enough to study or sew tapestries. lol
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And yet it was God himself who commanded his prophet to marry Gomer and take her back after cheating on him and leaving him. Seems that God disagrees with your assessment and places a much higher value on Gomer.
Just for clarity, while disparaging every woman who doesn't meet your standards as a Gomer is not a Godly attitude. Thinking that the story of Hosea and Gomer means you should date someone with more red flags than a communist parade is also extremely foolish.
Just for clarity, while disparaging every woman who doesn't meet your standards as a Gomer is not a Godly attitude. Thinking that the story of Hosea and Gomer means you should date someone with more red flags than a communist parade is also extremely foolish.
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God doesn't command anyone to date or marry but if He did for you personally, then surely He would have arranged it. It's usually the parents who arrange or pressure their offspring to marry.
Paul did tell young widows to remarry, probably so they wouldn't become a burden to others in the church. He also told wives to ask their husbands questions about faith at home and to keep silent!
I think if you can't contain yourself, then its good to marry but it comes with huge obligations that many actually can't handle. Plus for a lot of women, it's not fun being married, men seem to get a better deal going wherever they want, while wife stuck at home with nobody to talk to and nowhere to go, especially in the early years. And who's to say your home is actually in working order, or even if you can afford one these days.
Govts around the world can and do population control, or require workers for this and that (or not) or they encourage people to marry and have lots of children for the sake of hidden agendas eg. Singapore has govt sponsored dating, and Quebec wanted more french to reproduce so they would outnumber the English. lol. Then other countries are like...we lost all our men in the war, so women have to run the country by themselves. Lets make them work and not marry because we lose a worker if a woman is at home looking after babies.
I've seen ads in newspapers saying 'sponsor a girl child, so that she' doesn't get pregnant or marry when shes 13 years old". Of course men want to marry someone as soon as they come of age, (cos otherwise who will help them?!) and I think they don't really see the consequences a lot of the time or understand what women really want, or even know what love can mean in a marriage.
Paul did tell young widows to remarry, probably so they wouldn't become a burden to others in the church. He also told wives to ask their husbands questions about faith at home and to keep silent!
I think if you can't contain yourself, then its good to marry but it comes with huge obligations that many actually can't handle. Plus for a lot of women, it's not fun being married, men seem to get a better deal going wherever they want, while wife stuck at home with nobody to talk to and nowhere to go, especially in the early years. And who's to say your home is actually in working order, or even if you can afford one these days.
Govts around the world can and do population control, or require workers for this and that (or not) or they encourage people to marry and have lots of children for the sake of hidden agendas eg. Singapore has govt sponsored dating, and Quebec wanted more french to reproduce so they would outnumber the English. lol. Then other countries are like...we lost all our men in the war, so women have to run the country by themselves. Lets make them work and not marry because we lose a worker if a woman is at home looking after babies.
I've seen ads in newspapers saying 'sponsor a girl child, so that she' doesn't get pregnant or marry when shes 13 years old". Of course men want to marry someone as soon as they come of age, (cos otherwise who will help them?!) and I think they don't really see the consequences a lot of the time or understand what women really want, or even know what love can mean in a marriage.
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I did not disparage EVERY woman who did not meet MY standards
Gomer had more red flags than I-79 construction zone.
Do you know why God commands the prophet to marry a whore?
God used that marriage as a major warning to His people Judah with His judgement upon the tribes of Israel.
It was not directed personally to you or any other individual on this forum. It was directed to the majority of what passes for Christian churches in America. A lot more read these threads than join.
I commended many times the awesome parenting and children that resulted from such parenting that followed God's Word. I've worked with them in many ways. I learned much from their examples too.
I gave credit where it was due, but will not sully the honorable hard work of very decent young people and parenting with what passes for the norm right now. Those successful families did not happen by accident.
I could give a dozen examples of what the average was like growing up in the public fool system. I went to a secular university and know what it was like to know christians and non christians. I am not insensitive to the families suffering because their children are addicted to heroine or those who nail their daughters bedroom windows closed because they keep sneaking out at night to go to other bedrooms. They don't outgrow that. It progressively gets worse. How many times have I been asked to pray for their families? I don't know.
In this particular thread, a question was raised and I answered it honestly.
You speak of clarity, I will be even clearer, My standards are to obey what God says about finding marriage material. It's more than just the Gomer example. She was not an example of what God intends for a believer. He gave many of those in Proverbs. All if it is good and very clear what His intent is for family and marriage. Would you like examples for clarity?
I will simply post a few verses from one chapter of that one book of Hosea.
You are entitled to disagree about my attitude as being "not a Godly attitude".
How is my agreement with God a not Godly attitude? Just so you can see what His attitude is, just read the short book. You'll see if anything, God's attitude of approval and disapproval is far beyond the average pastor's teaching.
This is just an extremely small sample from the entire Bible warning nations and individuals against the following behavior in chapter 4.
"The beginning of the word of the LORD by Hosea. And the LORD said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee a wife of whoredoms and children of whoredoms: for the land hath committed great whoredom, departing from the LORD.
6My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children. 7As they were increased, so they sinned against me: therefore will I change their glory into shame. 8They eat up the sin of my people, and they set their heart on their iniquity. 9And there shall be, like people, like priest: and I will punish them for their ways, and reward them their doings.
10For they shall eat, and not have enough: they shall commit whoredom, and shall not increase: because they have left off to take heed to the LORD. 11Whoredom and wine and new wine take away the heart. 12My people ask counsel at their stocks, and their staff declareth unto them: for the spirit of whoredoms hath caused them to err, and they have gone a whoring from under their God.
13They sacrifice upon the tops of the mountains, and burn incense upon the hills, under oaks and poplars and elms, because the shadow thereof is good: therefore your daughters shall commit whoredom, and your spouses shall commit adultery.
15Though thou, Israel, play the harlot, yet let not Judah offend; and come not ye unto Gilgal, neither go ye up to Bethaven, nor swear, The LORD liveth. 16For Israel slideth back as a backsliding heifer: now the LORD will feed them as a lamb in a large place. 17Ephraim is joined to idols: let him alone. 18Their drink is sour: they have committed whoredom continually: her rulers with shame do love...."
It gets worse when you read the judgements on Israel. With exceptions American christianity has gone the way of the world, the flesh and the devil for a long time.
God has been patient and has begun sending the first stage of judgement upon my nation. Unfortunately, we all will suffer to a degree regardless of our walk with God.
In addition to thanking the many parents reading this post, I will throw a big thanks to the multitude of pastors out there in internetland for the job of bringing great judgement upon our nation!
☕😐📖
G
I would think with so many internet dating sites that it would be a numbers game with inevitable success to find someone, but according to men and women that I've spoken with they make it sound like most of the people they meet on those sites are frigging nuts! 
No, I hate dating sites, having found them to be momentarily entertaining, but ultimately a complete waste of time.
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I would think with so many internet dating sites that it would be a numbers game with inevitable success to find someone, but according to men and women that I've spoken with they make it sound like most of the people they meet on those sites are frigging nuts!
I never hear anything from people who ARE nuts and using dating sites. I hear a lot about how many crazy people there are on dating sites, but where are they in real life? Hmm...
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Yes I do. There is a number of reasons. I rededicated my life 1-9-2022, before that finding a date was simpler. Now it is hard to find a single Christian women, never mind one that may have a connection with. For me, I attend a smaller Baptist Church and there are no women single my age or even a little older/younger. Me personally would rather have someone older but have an open mind as well. Finding a women who truly loves the lord is not an easy task. I have learned that it is in the Lord's hands and his timing. I need to be patient and have my focus on him. Maybe it is not in his will for me to be married or maybe he has a women who is the right one because he has someone greater than I would choose on my own. The best choice is to stay faithful to the lord and let him work in our lives. His way is far greater than the way we may choose to go.
But over all, yes I find it much harder now to date.
But over all, yes I find it much harder now to date.
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One more thing I wanted to add. Something that makes it hard, is technology. I think it promotes many things. Christians can even be exposed to things weather on TV or their phones, that set a way of expectation. Like there is a check list. I do understand that it's a natural trait as humans but I think people go to far sometimes. Technology can influence that trait. This is just my own opinion it's not a fact.
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With regards to Gomer, which really is a picture of Israel..
Gomer can be seen as being attracted to other men or you could frame it this way that she was tempted all the time, or even preyed on by others (with bribery) to forget her husband. Gomer is blamed, but what about her lovers that went with her? Was she only one doing all the enticing? Or were they just naturally attracted to her anyway, for simply being a woman?
I think most women can understand being hit on by men who don't truly love you and just want a good time. If you fall for that then as long as you know that's all that its ever going to be and they will ditch you the moment you get up out of that bed.
Gomer can be seen as being attracted to other men or you could frame it this way that she was tempted all the time, or even preyed on by others (with bribery) to forget her husband. Gomer is blamed, but what about her lovers that went with her? Was she only one doing all the enticing? Or were they just naturally attracted to her anyway, for simply being a woman?
I think most women can understand being hit on by men who don't truly love you and just want a good time. If you fall for that then as long as you know that's all that its ever going to be and they will ditch you the moment you get up out of that bed.
I don't know about American christianity being much different from everyone else's christianity.. but I do think Babylon has a hold on women and men who are only thinking of their flesh all the time. Anyone in their teens-twenties will be a bunch of hormones anyway I think its encouraged that people want more/the world than to actually think about what true love is. People mistakenly think sex is the same as love or that lust is love, because that's what makes people feel good or wanted. But body possession isn't really love and sex is not always about making love.
Most girls growing up cannot handle their first relationships and heartbreaks or what it means to give their body to someone, because sex is promoted as fun and life giving (after all, it leads to babies !) but they soon find out that nobody's actually really fully prepared for that part. And men aren't either. Young men should go to hospitals and see women giving birth and their screams to understand what they will have a hand in doing lol.
Most girls growing up cannot handle their first relationships and heartbreaks or what it means to give their body to someone, because sex is promoted as fun and life giving (after all, it leads to babies !) but they soon find out that nobody's actually really fully prepared for that part. And men aren't either. Young men should go to hospitals and see women giving birth and their screams to understand what they will have a hand in doing lol.
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I don't totally disagree with you......but I do think you are blaming only men. What about women? Women do the exact same thing. Yes womens hearts break......but so doesn't mean. I know mine has many of times. When a women gets pregnant......isn't she involved in the act as well? (I'm not referring to rape or things of that nature) I'm talking between two people who sleep together. This is where technology has a role in this as well. Sex is exposed so easily even for children. It is easy to have perverted things available for all to see. But women are just as guilty as men as far as "hitting on" "ditching" things of that subject. This world is taking god out of it and sin is raising. The lack of god in people's lives is showing stronger. It's so easy for the world to be worldly with technology alone. With all the availability of perverse images and actions, it's effecting minds and actions people do. People need to repent and put their minds on the lord and the world.
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