Wow! So as someone who was in ministry I'm gonna take a different view than most will
Not to put words in your mouth, but it sounds like you are taking the "us against them" approach that some pastors take toward the peasants sitting in the pews.
is the guy on the couch a Christian or not?
What difference does it make? Both the Christian and non-Christian need a leader who they can count on during spiritual hard times. And neither are getting that now, in most instances.
The non-Christian needs to hear the Gospel, and the Christian needs guidance on how to spread the Good News. Unfortunately, neither are receiving those things.
Never heard a pastor say that in all my years.
Maybe you just aren't willing to hear it.
But still, your pastor shouldn't have to guilt you (the guy on the couch) into going to church.
You are right, especially since it never, ever, ever, works. So, I say again, Pastors, please stop doing it. Because it is having a negative effect.