Contentment in singlehood

[Ceph]

Hi Jared,

I read your post before church this morning, and have been thinking and praying about it all day. I am not in any way trying to be contentious, but if I may, I would like to share some of the many thoughts your post made me think about.

I fully understand the description of dying alone with no one to care or notice until it's long past your due date. I'm very thankful you brought this up, because it's a heart-breaking reality that many singles fear.

Several years ago, after my husband had left and some church members told me I could never marry again, while one said she believed I'd be married again in two years, I hit rock bottom. I was more lost and confused than ever before in my life. I'd always had problems with depression, but this was a level beyond anything I'd ever experienced before.

I often feel that sometimes, Christianity seems to make marriage into The Golden Ticket, just like in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It's the brass ring, the champion trophy, the tenure of the Christian life. All You Have To Do Is Find Your Golden Ticket, And All Will Be Well. All your sexual feelings will be met and cured, you'll never be alone again, and you'll have a family to take care of you for the rest of your life. You're going to be surrounded by a circle of loving people at the end of your life, all crying and talking about how much they love you and will miss you, and how they can't wait to see you again in heaven, and they will adoringly close your eyes as you journey on from this life into the next, basking in a sea of love.

I would like to tell a story about Betting One's Life On Finding That Golden Ticket.

I used to talk about this more openly, but now feel God leads me to only share the basic details.

One Friday night, I was literally crying out to God that all hope was lost. I was 25 years old and felt that my one chance -- because Christianity only gives you one chance -- and I had just lost my Golden Ticket to Never Being Alone and Having All The Problems Brought On By Singleness solved. There would never be another, and at 25, I had to face the hard truth (because Christianity is full of hard truths,) that I would just have to cope with being alone for the rest of my life. At the time, I couldn't bear the though of living to, say, 95, and ALWAYS being alone.

I specifically mention Friday because I had it all planned out -- I was going to take my own life. I couldn't cope with the absolute empty despair I saw as my future. I couldn't bear to think about spending my life being around other people who had all found THEIR Golden Tickets, with me always by myself. After all, I was the only failure (divorce) in my family. I told God knew what the consequences were (according to my church, automatic ticket to hell,) but I could see no other way out, and I told Him I would fail living the rest of my life as a single anyway.

I didn't work that Saturday or Sunday, and I figured people would certainly raise eyebrows Monday (I never missed work unless I was near-death sick,) but no one would actually come looking for me until at least Tuesday... maybe not even until Wednesday.) This would give me "plenty of time." I planned to die on a Friday, allowing enough time would go by to ensure my "success," because many days would pass before anyone came to check.

A phone call from an old friend I hadn't talked to in 5 months, an hour and a half a way -- who was a self-proclaimed atheist (but we'd had many talks about God and religion) -- just "happened" to call me that day, at that specific time, just to catch up. When she realized what was going on, she quietly and discreetly called another friend of mine -- whom she didn't even know and had never spoken to, but she called him to check up on me -- and he just "happened" to live close enough to show up on my doorstep. He firmly (but gently, or I would have refused to budge,) insisted on taking me to seek help. (He later said he'd come with a hammer, just in case I refused to open the door. Let's just say, I am well-known to be a bit... stubborn. He was prepared to knock out a window and literally drag me out of the house if need be.)

I don't know how close I came to dying, as all my parents would tell me is that the doctors labeled my condition as "borderline."

God saved my life through someone who claimed to be an atheist. But I have no doubt He called her to make that phone call on that particular day, at that particular time. (Any sooner, I would have been able to hold it together and not mention anything; any later, and it might have been too late.)

I heard a church sermon a few months ago saying that it's estimated that within a few years, 60% of most churches will be singles. So let's add another statistic on top of that. If 40% of churches are married's, the harsh truth is that statistics also say 50% of those marriages might end in divorce.

I'm not good at statistics, but even I can figure out that this means the time is coming -- and soon -- when the majority of the church is going to be singles -- whether due to death, divorce, or just not being married. And I'm pretty sure most would agree with me that the church is completely unprepared for this.

A very wise CC friend (who has also been through the pain of divorce) and I have talked about the fact that for those of us who have been married, even if we have a Biblical reason, some people (including my friend and myself) might have to face that fact that it might not be God's will for us to marry again. For instance, I know my depression is one of the reasons my husband left, and the girl he chose had a much happier, less doom and gloom disposition (we all worked together, so I was familiar with her personality.)

One of the reasons I have been cautious about not jumping into anything is because I don't want to put the burden of my particular troubles on anyone else again (and of course, I have a fear that they would just leave anyway.)

If God is telling some people they need to remain single, for whatever reason, especially after a divorce, this certainly isn't a teaching that's going to go viral with popularity -- but it's the hard truth. And how many divorced people are going to be willing to be told they can't marry again? But for those whom it may apply and can obey, this means we are going to have a lot of people in the church who are going to have to let go of the dream of Finding The Golden Marriage Ticket and learn how to be single -- for the REST of their lives.

But if Marriage As The Goal... can no longer be the goal -- what else is there? This is the challenge many singles are going to have to find out.

I often think about Anna, who lived with her husband 7 years before he died, and she remained unmarried (whether by choice or by calling, only God knows for sure.) But one thing is very sure -- God chose her as one of the few human beings who was able to recognize, hold, and worship baby Jesus as He began His mission to save humanity.

I don't know what the answer is, but I do know there has to be other answers other than just "God Doesn't Want Anyone To Be Alone And We All Must Be Married"...

Because if not, there are going to be a whole lot of other people who already feel, or are going to be feeling exactly what I was feeling on that particular Friday night.

The very thought of it breaks my heart.

And I'm sure this must break God's heart as well.

There are plenty of prophets throughout the Bible who have lead single lives, even one whom God had directly killed his wife (Ezekiel 24:16) to serve as a sign for the rest of His people.
I myself am soneone who's had suicidal thoughts out of the sheer dispair for the circumstances I've been through.
But there's one thing that God has sown on me, and that's to lean on His presence more than what I hope to do.
In any situation I have the living God in my mind and body, and I can enjoy living with Him in my imagination even if my body is standing still. If my plans fail, I still have Him, and he's ready to give me another place to go. I used to embrace it much, but now I'm learning to embrace it again. It seems the things I've been though have been part of a process of washing my soul clean.

I'm glad that God has preserved you, so that I could discover you and the people who are around you, and find out about the real family I have in heaven. Before I discovered you freinds, I was entirely all alone.

 

[seoulsearch]

There are plenty of prophets throughout the Bible who have lead single lives, even one whom God had directly killed his wife (Ezekiel 24:16) to serve as a sign for the rest of His people.
I myself am soneone who's had suicidal thoughts out of the sheer dispair for the circumstances I've been through.
But there's one thing that God has sown on me, and that's to lean on His presence more than what I hope to do.
In any situation I have the living God in my mind and body, and I can enjoy living with Him in my imagination even if my body is standing still. If my plans fail, I still have Him, and he's ready to give me another place to go. I used to embrace it much, but now I'm learning to embrace it again. It seems the things I've been though have been part of a process of washing my soul clean.

I'm glad that God has preserved you, so that I could discover you and the people who are around you, and find out about the real family I have in heaven. Before I discovered you freinds, I was entirely all alone.

Thank you for your kind words and for your testimony, Ceph. Your faith is an inspiration. I don't think I'm quite at the point you are yet, but your posts are certainly are good motivation! You have many talents and much knowledge to share.

We are glad you're here, and I hope you'll keep posting and reaching out to us whenever you like.

 

[Ceph]

Thank you for your kind words and for your testimony, Ceph. Your faith is an inspiration. I don't think I'm quite at the point you are yet, but your posts are certainly are good motivation! You have many talents and much knowledge to share.

We are glad you're here, and I hope you'll keep posting and reaching out to us whenever you like.

Oh, I still don't know how to receive such positive compliments yet.. but thank you.
I have also borne firsthand witness to my parents divorcing and all the calamaties that come from that at 8, and then being dual custody with my mom who had the majority of time with me, while she married a very nice person imediately after who died of brain cancer very shortly afterward.
It's alot to unpack and talk about, not that it's hard on my emotions but it's just so much.
I think for these things it's why there's a significant point throughout the bible that God will defend the fatherless and the widow.

 

[seoulsearch]

And I mention the number not as clout, but to vent my EXTREME frustration that NOT ONCE have I heard sermons on topics such as: 2. "What To Do If You/Your Parents Abandon You."
Correction: What To Do If Your Parents and/or Your Children/Family/Friends Abandon You.

Maybe a newly divorced father needs help learning how to cook for his 3 kids -- because his wife, who has gone home to the Lord, used to run the kitchen -- and now he's not sure where to begin.
Correction: I meant to just say, a newly divorced father-- not one whose wife had died.

I apologize for the many errors in my posts.

I usually make a few mistakes in my posts as it is, but this was especially bad!

My brain always works 10 times faster than my typing, so in my head, I'm usually 4 sentences ahead of something my fingers are writing out -- and it shows!

Even when I go back and read it -- sometimes 3 or 4 times, my mind often reads it the way I was wording it in my head, not the way it actually appears on the screen.

Please accept my apologies!

 

[seoulsearch]

Oh, I still don't know how to receive such positive compliments yet.. but thank you.
I have also borne firsthand witness to my parents divorcing and all the calamaties that come from that at 8, and then being dual custody with my mom who had the majority of time with me, while she married a very nice person imediately after who died of brain cancer very shortly afterward. It's alot to unpack and talk about, not that it's hard on my emotions but it's just so much.
I think for these things it's why there's a significant point throughout the bible that God will defend the fatherless and the widow.

I am so very, very sorry that you've gone through all this.

It is most definitely an entire mountain range of feelings to process!!

I'm glad God led you here. We have many people on this site who have gone through similar situations -- I hope you'll get to meet them as you continue your journey here!

I'm sorry I don't have the right words to say, but I do know that God loves you very much and that we are here to try to help you.

P.S. I meant to comment about your INCREDIBLE talents in the thread showing pictures of your obvious mechanical genius , but didn't get to it.

God has greatly blessed you, and we are blessed to have you share that with us!

 

[Kainos]

But if Marriage As The Goal... can no longer be the goal -- what else is there? This is the challenge many singles are going to have to find out..

Marriage remains the consummate purpose for you. More so than ever, when the Father has come to the fatherless.

In the fullness of time, the pain of spousal abandonment can be supplanted by the hope that comes with the expectation of being all dressed in white at the marriage supper of the Lamb.

Your big occasion is yet to come, and some of us might not get to meet you before that day. So a stroll along the banks of the pure river of water of life will be right for the occasion, after you've taken receipt of the open invitation to be His eternal Bride.

 

[Lynx]

This is splitting hairs. You’re dodging the question and moving the goal post. I’m not going to waste my time arguing like this.

If someone wants to lie to themselves and they‘re old and dying thinking “Thank God I dodged hundreds if not thousands of bullets,” that’s their prerogative. No self-respecting Christian would call that a fulfilling life.

Let’s see what the Good Book says:

1. Genesis 2:24
"That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh."

2. Ephesians 5:25
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."

3. Proverbs 18:22
"He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord."

4. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up."

5. Colossians 3:14
"And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

6. Mark 10:9
"Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

7. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs."

8. Hebrews 13:4
"Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral."

9. 1 Peter 4:8
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."

10. Proverbs 31:10
"A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies."

11. 1 Corinthians 7:3-4
"The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife."

12. Genesis 1:27-28
"So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, 'Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.'"

13. Song of Solomon 3:4
"I have found the one whom my soul loves."

14. 1 Corinthians 11:11-12
"Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God."

15. 1 Peter 3:7
"Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."

16. Proverbs 5:18-19
"May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love."

17. Ecclesiastes 9:9
"Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun."

18. Song of Solomon 4:9
"You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes."

19. 1 Corinthians 13:13
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

20. Proverbs 12:4
"A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones."

21. Ephesians 4:2-3
"Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace."

I didn't split nothing.

Just because you think it sucks doesn't mean everybody thinks it sucks.

You claim that anybody who says it does not suck is basically a liar.

If I used the same logic on you, I would claim you are just not trying hard enough to adapt to your situation. I am fine being single, so by your logic I could claim that you should be fine being single too.

But you are not me.

 

[Ceph]

I am so very, very sorry that you've gone through all this.

It is most definitely an entire mountain range of feelings to process!!

I'm glad God led you here. We have many people on this site who have gone through similar situations -- I hope you'll get to meet them as you continue your journey here!

I'm sorry I don't have the right words to say, but I do know that God loves you very much and that we are here to try to help you.

P.S. I meant to comment about your INCREDIBLE talents in the thread showing pictures of your obvious mechanical genius , but didn't get to it.

God has greatly blessed you, and we are blessed to have you share that with us!

Maybe I am more overwhelmed than I think. My heart has spent a long time damming that mountain range of feelings up, and has gotten into a mindset of 'no sense in shedding tears when things could always be worse, no sense in being suprised when it can happen to anyone'. I admit it's made me quite calloused, but I'm finding out how to lighten up.
I have no expecation from you on what to say, so never worry about that. God knows about my circumstances even more than me, so He is who I first expect an answer from in any case.
As young as I am, I've seen a lot. I've been on the internet highways for a long time, and besides practical things, have learned about people, upon people, upon people. I've probably learned too much for my own good, but don't worry about me.
I lust need to learn what it's like to have freinds.

 

[Ceph]

*Just need to learn what it's like to have freinds.
Oh my.

 

[cinder]

*Just need to learn what it's like to have freinds.
Oh my.

At least it didn't say need to learn what it's like to have fiends. No one needs to learn that.

 

[seoulsearch]

Marriage remains the consummate purpose for you. More so than ever, when the Father has come to the fatherless. In the fullness of time, the pain of spousal abandonment can be supplanted by the hope that comes with the expectation of being all dressed in white at the marriage supper of the Lamb.

Your big occasion is yet to come, and some of us might not get to meet you before that day. So a stroll along the banks of the pure river of water of life will be right for the occasion, after you've taken receipt of the open invitation to be His eternal Bride.

I feel like a bit of a dunce (not the first time, certainly not the last! ), but I never thought of it this way!

Maybe this is why so many people feel such an innate need to marry -- because we are all designed to eventually be a part of the Bride of Christ...

Thank you!

As always, @Kainos, you are a poetic blessing!

 

[seoulsearch]

Maybe I am more overwhelmed than I think. My heart has spent a long time damming that mountain range of feelings up, and has gotten into a mindset of 'no sense in shedding tears when things could always be worse, no sense in being suprised when it can happen to anyone'. I admit it's made me quite calloused, but I'm finding out how to lighten up.
I have no expecation from you on what to say, so never worry about that. God knows about my circumstances even more than me, so He is who I first expect an answer from in any case.
As young as I am, I've seen a lot. I've been on the internet highways for a long time, and besides practical things, have learned about people, upon people, upon people. I've probably learned too much for my own good, but don't worry about me.
I lust need to learn what it's like to have freinds.

Life is a tough enough journey as it is, and even more so when someone is trying to tackle everything alone. Many of us are here looking for the same things -- friendships -- and whatever else the Lord may lead us to.

I truly hope we can be of some assistance to you.

 

[seoulsearch]

At least it didn't say need to learn what it's like to have fiends. No one needs to learn that.

It's a little past my bedtime, but I can make an exception for a fellow fiend.

 

[Jared_K]

Hi Jared,

I read your post before church this morning, and have been thinking and praying about it all day. I am not in any way trying to be contentious, but if I may, I would like to share some of the many thoughts your post made me think about.

I fully understand the description of dying alone with no one to care or notice until it's long past your due date. I'm very thankful you brought this up, because it's a heart-breaking reality that many singles fear.

Several years ago, after my husband had left and some church members told me I could never marry again, while one said she believed I'd be married again in two years, I hit rock bottom. I was more lost and confused than ever before in my life. I'd always had problems with depression, but this was a level beyond anything I'd ever experienced before.

I often feel that sometimes, Christianity seems to make marriage into The Golden Ticket, just like in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It's the brass ring, the champion trophy, the tenure of the Christian life. All You Have To Do Is Find Your Golden Ticket, And All Will Be Well. All your sexual feelings will be met and cured, you'll never be alone again, and you'll have a family to take care of you for the rest of your life. You're going to be surrounded by a circle of loving people at the end of your life, all crying and talking about how much they love you and will miss you, and how they can't wait to see you again in heaven, and they will adoringly close your eyes as you journey on from this life into the next, basking in a sea of love.

I would like to tell a story about Betting One's Life On Finding That Golden Ticket.

I used to talk about this more openly, but now feel God leads me to only share the basic details.

One Friday night, I was literally crying out to God that all hope was lost. I was 25 years old and felt that my one chance -- because Christianity only gives you one chance -- and I had just lost my Golden Ticket to Never Being Alone and Having All The Problems Brought On By Singleness solved. There would never be another, and at 25, I had to face the hard truth (because Christianity is full of hard truths,) that I would just have to cope with being alone for the rest of my life. At the time, I couldn't bear the though of living to, say, 95, and ALWAYS being alone.

I specifically mention Friday because I had it all planned out -- I was going to take my own life. I couldn't cope with the absolute empty despair I saw as my future. I couldn't bear to think about spending my life being around other people who had all found THEIR Golden Tickets, with me always by myself. After all, I was the only failure (divorce) in my family. I told God knew what the consequences were (according to my church, automatic ticket to hell,) but I could see no other way out, and I told Him I would fail living the rest of my life as a single anyway.

I didn't work that Saturday or Sunday, and I figured people would certainly raise eyebrows Monday (I never missed work unless I was near-death sick,) but no one would actually come looking for me until at least Tuesday... maybe not even until Wednesday.) This would give me "plenty of time." I planned to die on a Friday, allowing enough time would go by to ensure my "success," because many days would pass before anyone came to check.

A phone call from an old friend I hadn't talked to in 5 months, an hour and a half a way -- who was a self-proclaimed atheist (but we'd had many talks about God and religion) -- just "happened" to call me that day, at that specific time, just to catch up. When she realized what was going on, she quietly and discreetly called another friend of mine -- whom she didn't even know and had never spoken to, but she called him to check up on me -- and he just "happened" to live close enough to show up on my doorstep. He firmly (but gently, or I would have refused to budge,) insisted on taking me to seek help. (He later said he'd come with a hammer, just in case I refused to open the door. Let's just say, I am well-known to be a bit... stubborn. He was prepared to knock out a window and literally drag me out of the house if need be.)

I don't know how close I came to dying, as all my parents would tell me is that the doctors labeled my condition as "borderline."

God saved my life through someone who claimed to be an atheist. But I have no doubt He called her to make that phone call on that particular day, at that particular time. (Any sooner, I would have been able to hold it together and not mention anything; any later, and it might have been too late.)

I heard a church sermon a few months ago saying that it's estimated that within a few years, 60% of most churches will be singles. So let's add another statistic on top of that. If 40% of churches are married's, the harsh truth is that statistics also say 50% of those marriages might end in divorce.

I'm not good at statistics, but even I can figure out that this means the time is coming -- and soon -- when the majority of the church is going to be singles -- whether due to death, divorce, or just not being married. And I'm pretty sure most would agree with me that the church is completely unprepared for this.

A very wise CC friend (who has also been through the pain of divorce) and I have talked about the fact that for those of us who have been married, even if we have a Biblical reason, some people (including my friend and myself) might have to face that fact that it might not be God's will for us to marry again. For instance, I know my depression is one of the reasons my husband left, and the girl he chose had a much happier, less doom and gloom disposition (we all worked together, so I was familiar with her personality.)

One of the reasons I have been cautious about not jumping into anything is because I don't want to put the burden of my particular troubles on anyone else again (and of course, I have a fear that they would just leave anyway.)

If God is telling some people they need to remain single, for whatever reason, especially after a divorce, this certainly isn't a teaching that's going to go viral with popularity -- but it's the hard truth. And how many divorced people are going to be willing to be told they can't marry again? But for those whom it may apply and can obey, this means we are going to have a lot of people in the church who are going to have to let go of the dream of Finding The Golden Marriage Ticket and learn how to be single -- for the REST of their lives.

But if Marriage As The Goal... can no longer be the goal -- what else is there? This is the challenge many singles are going to have to find out.

I often think about Anna, who lived with her husband 7 years before he died, and she remained unmarried (whether by choice or by calling, only God knows for sure.) But one thing is very sure -- God chose her as one of the few human beings who was able to recognize, hold, and worship baby Jesus as He began His mission to save humanity.

I don't know what the answer is, but I do know there has to be other answers other than just "God Doesn't Want Anyone To Be Alone And We All Must Be Married"...

Because if not, there are going to be a whole lot of other people who already feel, or are going to be feeling exactly what I was feeling on that particular Friday night.

The very thought of it breaks my heart.

And I'm sure this must break God's heart as well.

I appreciate the kind words. Everyone has missed the point of what I’m saying. Twice. I am not going to try and explain it further because no one is even trying to understand.

 

[Ceph]

I appreciate the kind words. Everyone has missed the point of what I’m saying. Twice. I am not going to try and explain it further because no one is even trying to understand.

I get what you're saying, that we shouldn't 'lie to ourselves' by saying that we're happy living a life all alone.
Sure, I'd love to have someone around to check up on me, play around with me, and help me with things.
But I can't just wave a magic wand and have the right people to do that be here. Loneliness isn't always a choice, just a circumstance we're made to endure. Why don't you go out and find the lonely person who lives in the middle of the woods and hasn't had contact with anyone besides their immediate family their whole lives? You just can't find them, neither do they know where to look for you.
But we all can have God, and God knows how to bless every person wherever they are. When I know that God is with me, I am content with having nothing else, even if it means my carcass will be left in a strange and hidden place.
I'll meet up with all of you and never be alone again after that.

 

[Jared_K]

I get what you're saying, that we shouldn't 'lie to ourselves' by saying that we're happy living a life all alone.
Sure, I'd love to have someone around to check up on me, play around with me, and help me with things.
But I can't just wave a magic wand and have the right people to do that be here. Loneliness isn't always a choice, just a circumstance we're made to endure. Why don't you go out and find the lonely person who lives in the middle of the woods and hasn't had contact with anyone besides their immediate family their whole lives? You just can't find them, neither do they know where to look for you.
But we all can have God, and God knows how to bless every person wherever they are. When I know that God is with me, I am content with having nothing else, even if it means my carcass will be left in a strange and hidden place.
I'll meet up with all of you and never be alone again after that.

That is not my point at all. I just came back to close my account, which I’ll be doing shortly after I post this message. The truth is I found someone. Almost all of my free time is going into building that relationship now.

So, as my final post on this website, listen well, because I won’t be able to repeat it after I’m gone. My point is:

God promotes love.

It’s in the Bible, I gave several examples in this very thread. The Bible is our guide from the time it was written until the end of days. It’s the living word. We can’t argue that it’s outdated or wrong. Well, I mean, you CAN, but that’s not exactly doing you any favors with the big guy. We can only study it to try and understand what He truly meant. And if people want to scoff at the Bible, ignore it, or roll their eyes at it, fine. I honestly don’t care, hence the part where I’m leaving. Any one of us here can share a life with someone and be happy. All you need is a little courage, time to heal, truly learn the meaning of selflessness and have a willingness to try again. It’s not too late for any of us. I have faith in every single one of you to change your destinies, and that belief has never faltered. I truly wish you all happiness in your journeys, but mine is leading me down a more constructive path, and I don’t need to be here to do it. Best of luck to you all, and God bless you.

Nice meeting you @seoulsearch

 

[Magenta]

I just came back to close my account, which I’ll be doing shortly after I post this message. The
truth is I found someone. Almost all of my free time is going into building that relationship now.

Surely you will be missed, and I am sorry to hear that you will be leaving us, even as I am happy to hear that you have found someone, because as I have read your posts for quite a few months now and often wondered, how is this guy still single? You have so much to offer with a good head on your shoulders, varied interest and abilities, and most of all, a very giving heart. Best of luck to you.

 

[Magenta]

Marge You know I can't wait to meet the Apostle Paul. He is always giving me reason to over search scriptures.
God called me I was single, should I stay single no not sure. He and I RDV in heaven we are gonna discuss it.

Hello Edith, I agree that Paul was an amazing man, and I simply cannot imagine living as he did, though
I would certainly say, that if Christians collectively and individually, were even a teeny weeny bit more
like Paul, the world would be unrecognizable from what it is today. Also please excuse me for asking,
but what does RDV mean? Rendezvous? That comes to mind LOL

 

[Edith]

I'm sure I could have been married by now though. I'm also sure that if I had married, it would have been a mistake. Singleness might be lonely at times, but it's way better than being with the wrong person.

I think this where the issue lies, will he or she be the right person? Will they not walk away?

Seoul, (God bless her) has changed my mind with her story. At one point I thought, if he isn't working may be I can handle that, may be I can work with someone who is not fully Christian or may be I can manage one who is not fully committed to God. You see I was trying to lower my standards. but I can't really. What if I lower mine and he heightens his. No no no better stay single than compromise and be hurt.

 

[Edith]

That is not my point at all. I just came back to close my account, which I’ll be doing shortly after I post this message. The truth is I found someone. Almost all of my free time is going into building that relationship now.

So, as my final post on this website, listen well, because I won’t be able to repeat it after I’m gone. My point is:

Hallelujah thank you for coming and edifying us. May God see you through. we definitely will miss you
byebye