I haven't been here for long or had a lot of time to interact, but in the moment I have, this thread caught my eye. Men and women both have better outcomes when they define what they want and aim for that. It takes courage and effort, neither of which was necessarily instilled into us from our upbringing. (For those it was, they're likely married - they found what they wanted and they are putting the effort into keeping it that way. If they are widowed, they know what worked so they are trying it again and not raising the questions we are dealing with here)
Would it be fair to say that all of us had at least some twinges of loneliness, some wish that this whole process were easier, that there were more people in our path that are reasonable options for a life-long spouse partner? Relationships take work, but a lot of the work is on ourselves, to BE that better person, and we should be working to BE that person whether anyone else see it or not.
But the other side is taking the risk to establish friendships that could lead to knowing someone long enough to ascertain whether the person is spouse material. And after that, there is the commitment.
I faced the fact that, even at my advanced age, I'd prefer to spend the rest of my life as a beloved, supportive helpmeet (to use KJV) fit for a man of God and I put my information on an app. So far I've spoken with 4 spammers and met two decent human beings. I started the communication off with the clear understanding that I'm not in this to flirt and be hurt. I'm in this to communicate as a friend, neighbor, sister, fellow church member. So far that's worked. And to me it makes sense because first we need to know how to be a friend to everyone, even if we are as introverted as I can be, since this thing called life isn't all about me but is about US. It may be that neither nice man is spouse material, since the position has a high list of qualifications, but I feel like I'm ahead because I've gained the acquaintance of two really nice brothers in faith. I don't plan to invest what I can't afford to lose, which is my heart. At my age, it would be easy to feel rushed since folks up in this period, where our years in age make for a comfortable room temperature or the daily average temperature in areas between Florida and the equator, our acquaintances are starting to drop off and we attend far too many funerals.
I agree with the sensible information given before I started posting. I'd encourage you, dear brother, to get that bigger view of things, and to find your position in the Body of Christ and walk in that first. Yes, it's not good for man to be alone, so seeking that one person is a natural inclination. Keep in mind that you need to be all you can be and it's fair to expect her to be at least most of what she can be, as long as you're willing to encourage her into the rest of her best. She's out there waiting, I feel sure, so don't be afraid to take the first step and make those contacts or send those PMs, since many of us are still of the mindset that it's not becoming a woman to be too forward.
I probably have kids or grandkids your age, so if you need an old person sounding board, I imagine any of us old foggies would be glad to give you honest feedback.
I think you can do this, and I'd encourage you to get started.
pm someone, lol. Time is flying by, in case no one is noticing.