In life

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ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
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#21
Believe it or not there is much I had to leave out to try to keep it rated pg and I have seen those who have had it much worse than even me. I never understood why life seemed to have it out for me from birth even people in my life seemed to just cause damage to me or abandon me or never listen to me. Just to know what it was like to be cared about just to matter just to know what it is like to actually be loved this is what brought me to him I was in bed one night crying and just out of desperation said to him to please show me he was real just so I could know I was not all alone in this life.

I woke up in a pure white place standing next to father himself there was this massive river of rainbow colors so vivid and beautiful I was pouring tears I have never seen beauty that did that to me before he said to me this river was his plan and I could only keep saying to him thank you for showing me this over and over again.

Even this wasn't enough to bring me to him but it was the spark
I have always been a stubborn a child but that also means I put up a fight I honestly don't know how to give up and trust me sometimes I wished I knew how. But my friend no suffering is not in your future not all are called to suffer and the time ofg suffering is nearing it's end anyways.

Like you I discovered the hidden wonders of worship true worship in spirit and truth, the life that flows in it how it turns you into a giddy kid bouncing up and down unable to not dance for him unable to give him enough honor and praise to the point where you just shoot it up with everything in you

This was when he said to me this is thge key to open the floodgates, it all goes into the great unknown after that they mystery and wonder.
Like you I write poems with him I have a thread called a thread of Blain's psalms where he usually says pick up your pen I never know what I am going to write until I start and then words just pour out on their own so much I have to try to type as fast as I can.

And like you I have been given such precious treasures from him hidden beaities and secrets of him his kingdom and us and that is actually why I came back on here after so long he called me his little spark
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
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#22
These things you write are precious experiences that you have had. Please give me time to digest and reply
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
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#23
You are spot on in every way here. sometimes just to sit there and just be loved by him just letting him wrap you in his arms it's warm it's home.
I couldn't have said what you said any better: "...just to sit there and just be loved by him just letting him wrap you in his arms it's warm it's home. "
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
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#24
We have so much in common, experience of Him, poetry, why does He love us so much mere creatures, frail children of dust!
I have felt this way many times, what you have said: "......
unable to give him enough honor and praise to the point where you just shoot it up with everything in you"

So much we have experienced of the same things.

He has softened my heart so much that it doesn't take much to make me feel great emotion, sometimes weep. I care and love so much more than I ever did. I love other people more. I have much more compassion for people. I was doing a procedure at the Hospital Monday and something happened that to me was beautiful. The nurse had such a loving heart that it made me cry, she came over and we hugged each other, we both realized we loved each other. It was His love that did it in us. I may never see this nurse again but I will remember what happened.

Another recent experience: i got out of my car the other day and a neighbor lady who was a widow I have known for many years was coming out of her driveway, He gave me such unexpected love for her that I was crying and after a few seconds she was too (or nearly so). I said how can I help you. Turns out I did a small job in her backyard a year ago maybe (a drain that got plugged up) and needed to be unstuck again. So in response to what i asked her she asked me to help with that again. I have for a long time seen that she both had great anger and great love in her. So I told her that. And in that process I told her I love her with God's love (she knew it!!) and I asked her why she was angry and i told her I saw great love in her as well. She related why. I asked her if she was going to church and was she close to our Master and she said she was not but she was more close to Him some time ago before her husband died and related issues. She eventually told me why she was angry and I urged her to let go of it and to return to get close to Him.

I took a course to help homeless people years ago inspired by reading that was what He wanted me to do. At the end of the course I realized I didn't care at all about homeless people. So that was it for then. Now years later I care. I have made several contacts with homeless people. Many don't want help, what they want is recognition that the have worth and you care about them. I want to give it to them. God has worked on me over those years between taking the course and now!

I am caught off guard all the time. He will do, say, or have me realize something which is very surprising but very good. Seems like living life on the edge.

Several times I am overwhelmed with the knowledge of how good He is and how undeserving I am. I understand Mary Magdalen's love for Him and the great thankfulness to Him. I have the same feeling of thankfulness as her for saving me as if I had been in her skin. I also know of her great anxiety when she said "Where have you put in", I feel how she felt!

Emotion for emotion's sake is no good but it sure can be a good propellant to actually do the good too!
 

Blain

The Word Weaver
Aug 28, 2012
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#25
After reading this I am not sure how else to explain explain it but to call it kindred spirits. That love and care you spoke of how he softened your heart he did that with me as well. I have always cared about people always had a loving heart but to weep for people to be suddenly able to connect them emotionally and spiritually like that it requires a heart such as yours.

The invisable hands that the heart has and the unseen lips it speaks this is how the holy spirit works. Even just being on here I am now able to sense things about people just from reading their words I can tell if a person is dry or full of water I can feel bitterness in people or life in them if someone is emotional I can feel it as if they are my own.

Normally this would be discounted as we are often told to not trust how we feel to not rely on emotions or feelings, but Jesus went through every emotion including anger and fear he didn't sin in them either and the human heart whether people realize it or not runs on emotions and feelings that is how humans connect to each other

But then when ones heart is full of his love the emotions we go through are different and for a different reason it isn't relying on them or anything it is just a more intimate way for him to reach out to others.
 

Blain

The Word Weaver
Aug 28, 2012
19,504
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#26
This song here it is the song of my heart
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
976
495
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#27
After reading this I am not sure how else to explain explain it but to call it kindred spirits. That love and care you spoke of how he softened your heart he did that with me as well. I have always cared about people always had a loving heart but to weep for people to be suddenly able to connect them emotionally and spiritually like that it requires a heart such as yours.

The invisable hands that the heart has and the unseen lips it speaks this is how the holy spirit works. Even just being on here I am now able to sense things about people just from reading their words I can tell if a person is dry or full of water I can feel bitterness in people or life in them if someone is emotional I can feel it as if they are my own.

Normally this would be discounted as we are often told to not trust how we feel to not rely on emotions or feelings, but Jesus went through every emotion including anger and fear he didn't sin in them either and the human heart whether people realize it or not runs on emotions and feelings that is how humans connect to each other

But then when ones heart is full of his love the emotions we go through are different and for a different reason it isn't relying on them or anything it is just a more intimate way for him to reach out to others.
What you say helps me! I didn't understand what you said but it is true.

A little while ago I was talking to a pastor of a church I was thinking of attending and when I mentioned that I wanted to join because of how the people were I felt a sudden burst of feeling, couldn't talk! Then later(!) I found out what it meant: It meant that that in that congregation were people that love Him.

It seems like it takes much more faith from my past old ways of thinking that its psychological or made up. When He loves me all that goes away. I know its no accident or psychological effects.
 

Blain

The Word Weaver
Aug 28, 2012
19,504
2,711
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#28
What you say helps me! I didn't understand what you said but it is true.

A little while ago I was talking to a pastor of a church I was thinking of attending and when I mentioned that I wanted to join because of how the people were I felt a sudden burst of feeling, couldn't talk! Then later(!) I found out what it meant: It meant that that in that congregation were people that love Him.

It seems like it takes much more faith from my past old ways of thinking that its psychological or made up. When He loves me all that goes away. I know its no accident or psychological effects.
Yes I can sometimes be difficult to understand when the spirit takes over I speak of deep things that don't make sense to normal people such is the way he operates but the truth in it can be felt if one is able to percieve it.

And yes his love drowns everything else out the truth is in it and it is as I know you already know more than what we as humans know love as even as Christians his love is a rare thing. Operating in his love drives you as if your on auto mode
 

Poinsetta

Well-known member
Nov 24, 2018
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#29
With every breath that we breathe is a breath that you have blessed us with. With every day we see the morning and the setting of the sun because you have gifted us. With these in mind, lord is it your name we speak with the breath of life? Is it your name others hear when we speak? Is it you that is seen when we are before those who know you not? Our lives are a blessing that you have given us.

In my life you are the name spoken. In the home you have provided me with, it is you that dwells in the rooms. In my heart you sit for you have the thrown to it. Mind, body and soul are yours to have and to keep. You are in my home , in my heart, mind, body,and soul for you are with me. How great thou art words I love to speak.you are truth and love. How you shine your grace and mercy upon us. Even in hard times you are with us, that is your promise that you keep. For you are faithful. You are just and forgiving.

I rejoice and praise your name. I humbly bow to you, for I love you. May I be the servant that you want me to be. May I spread your word to others with love. For you have placed your way at our feet and I pray we stay true to it. Why do you love us so much, so much that Jesus has died for us? I love you father please be glorified in all that I do. Praise your holy name

I love you dear friend. 💐