Epidemic of childless and miserable 40+ women

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
S

SophieT

Guest
After a friend divorced I was helping them to find how to meet others. Was I shocked to read the comments on one singles site. . A woman wrote that her brother met women and the first thing they wanted to know was how much he made. She said that he was so sickened by the blatant status-seeking of these women that he would drive an older car just to test women out. So there does seem to be a subset of women who seek status.
I left this thread but I was notified you replied to a post of mine.

with regards to the above, there is subset of males wanting sex on the first date, so there is that too

There are plenty of decent people of both sexes around so I don't know where 'Christians' are going to find these loosers

Now if someone comes along and states those people are Christians? Yeah, well, not really

shrugs
 
S

SophieT

Guest
oh one more thing saintrose.

with regards to the person I wrote that post to, it is apparent he is writing from his own personal experience

One person's experience does not make for anything but their own experience.

that really is it for me in this thread. I didn't care for it from the get go. sorry
 

saintrose

Well-known member
May 9, 2020
906
511
63
Well we know that Communism has atheism as one of it's foundations.. And feminism is out to destroy the patriachy and lets face it God is the ultimate patriach.. It's not a co-incidence that a lot of feminists cannot stand Christianity.. Especially Bible based Christianity..
Henry Makow has written about the radical feminism. I believe in equal rights and equal pay but you have to step carefully and watch where things are leading before you buy into any mindset. But you can see the roots of communism in America. Where heading there mighty fast.
 

saintrose

Well-known member
May 9, 2020
906
511
63
I left this thread but I was notified you replied to a post of mine.

with regards to the above, there is subset of males wanting sex on the first date, so there is that too

There are plenty of decent people of both sexes around so I don't know where 'Christians' are going to find these loosers

Now if someone comes along and states those people are Christians? Yeah, well, not really

shrugs
Yes that's true too. I'm glad I'm not dating today - it must be so hard. I'm sure there are decent people around but there was a woman on Henry Makow in her 30's who can't find a good man.

George W. Bush called himself a Christian.
 

saintrose

Well-known member
May 9, 2020
906
511
63
oh one more thing saintrose.

with regards to the person I wrote that post to, it is apparent he is writing from his own personal experience

One person's experience does not make for anything but their own experience.

that really is it for me in this thread. I didn't care for it from the get go. sorry
Unsure what you are referring to but I'm sorry if it upset you. It wasn't my intention. I just happened to read that a young woman on Henry Makow was searching for a quality husband and couldn't find one. Then i had read the article about the women in their 40's that psychologists were finding were unhappy with their life choices. It's just a discussion. That's all.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
I'm sure there are decent people around but there was a woman on Henry Makow in her 30's who can't find a good man.
If people are open to long distance relationships, or if one person is willing to quit his/her job and move to another city and then start the job search again, there are more options. However, not many people are willing to do this.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
I have one couple friends, both of them were going through PhD programs in different states. They met online. They got married but the boy quit his PhD program, and moved to her city. She is fine with it now but she wanted him to get his PhD.
 

saintrose

Well-known member
May 9, 2020
906
511
63
If
people are open to long distance relationships, or if one person is willing to quit his/her job and move to another city and then start the job search again, there are more options. However, not many people are willing to do this.
That may be so; I don't know her particular circumstances, but if it was me I would move. I believe that woman had moved several times and the quality of men she was meeting was bad.
 

saintrose

Well-known member
May 9, 2020
906
511
63
I have one couple friends, both of them were going through PhD programs in different states. They met online. They got married but the boy quit his PhD program, and moved to her city. She is fine with it now but she wanted him to get his PhD.
That's good that it worked out for them. I don't think it appears to be that easy for others; especially those with heavy workloads. I think people have to really consider these things. I also watched a documentary about a couple who were both doctors and their son committed murder when he fell in with the wrong people. We live in a very difficult society now.
 

Tararose

Well-known member
Sep 30, 2020
753
564
93
Uk
www.101christiansocialnetwork.com
If it’s any consolation I know PLENTY of unhappily married women of all ages, and many of them are mothers too.

Paul was right, you sure save yourself a lot of trouble if you can remain single. Does it mean Satan won’t use it against you? Well of course he will. Just like he uses an unhappy marriage to get to married Christians, just like he messes with the kids to get at Christian parents.

I think this is just an age of discontent.

A friend of mine said that teens aren’t normal these days unless they get labelled with some disorder or other. Look at the abuse stats, abortion rates, teen pregnancy rates, people
Choosing transgender/homosexual Lifestyles, the suicide stats, divorce stats etc. and you start to see basically all of our society is just falling apart at the seams.

By 40 a woman realises she may have missed the boat and then wants what she can’t have, as is the way of discontented flesh, always wanting what we don’t have. That is, we only actually want it UNTIL we get it usually.

If Paul says slaves can find their freedom and satisfaction in Christ, there is no excuse for any of us.

Thank God we can find our satisfaction in Christ.
 
Mar 1, 2021
85
81
18
When we had our first child, my husband and I collectively made the decision for me to be a homemaker. I will be the first to admit there are long days some days when I find myself getting jealous of women who choose a career and seem to have more of a social life during the work day, but ultimately I think I get so much more satisfaction and I'm happier overall with the choice we made because I feel like I'm fulfilling a deeper purpose with my family. I definitely feel bad for other women on the other side of the fence who made different choices because it's hard to go back.

Also after reading through this thread, which is based on how women over 40 feel, I can't help but wonder if there is the same kind of issue with men, or is it a bigger deal with us (women)? I'm curious if any men have that perspective. Maybe since men are just more traditionally career driven, it's different. But it seems like if there are a lot of single women out there in need of partners, the same should be true for men! :)
 
Jul 9, 2020
846
492
63
Also after reading through this thread, which is based on how women over 40 feel, I can't help but wonder if there is the same kind of issue with men, or is it a bigger deal with us (women)? I'm curious if any men have that perspective. Maybe since men are just more traditionally career driven, it's different. But it seems like if there are a lot of single women out there in need of partners, the same should be true for men! :)
Man's perspective:
I love to hear about women that reject feminism, take care to their men and homeschool their children. Hat's off to you! Society depends on you! Without you civilization itself will soon collapse. But feminist women who reject their God given role? Career women? They disgust me! I have zero respect for them. I can't even stand to be anywhere near them.

As to the problem of so many single women in need of partners? I'm pretty confident I know the answer. It's two parts. One is indeed the presence of feminism. No actual man wants to be married to a feminist - who is invariably going to cheat on him, then divorce him, and take his kids and all his money. The other big contributor is porn. Guys get addicted to the dopamine rush of seeing a naked woman and masturbating to it. It reduces the drive to actually go out and get a real woman when all they have to do is close their eyes and have her in virtual form. And if you think it's bad now, then just wait until these sexbots get a little more realistic and the price comes down. Sexbots will be superior to a feminist in every way.

So my advise to young women: be the anti-feminist! Separate yourself as much as possible from your feminist peers. Reject everything they say and do. Hit the gym, and eat right. Reject the temptation to sleep around. Learn to enjoy cooking and taking care of a house. You will be mocked by most all women and lots of sissified men. But if you keep at it, I'm confident that you will eventually find a good man that you can raise a family with. And I truly believe that there is no greater joy than that.
 
Jul 9, 2020
846
492
63
After a friend divorced I was helping them to find how to meet others. Was I shocked to read the comments on one singles site. . A woman wrote that her brother met women and the first thing they wanted to know was how much he made. She said that he was so sickened by the blatant status-seeking of these women that he would drive an older car just to test women out. So there does seem to be a subset of women who seek status.
I found a good woman back when I was making minimum wage. I knew she wasn't in it for the $$. Now I make $$ and she's still with me. If I was in the market for a woman today, I'd sell everything, buy coins and bury them somewhere, get a rusted out junker of a truck and live in a trailer somewhere...then I would start my search.

Funny thing is that if I did that, my dates would be the same as they are now with my wife.... Go down to the grocery store, pick up some fried chicken and a gallon of iced tea... head on down to the beach (or whatever), and eat chicken while watching the waves and enjoying the sunset. If she can't enjoy that with me, then she ain't the one!
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
The other big contributor is porn. Guys get addicted to the dopamine rush of seeing a naked woman and masturbating to it. It reduces the drive to actually go out and get a real woman when all they have to do is close their eyes and have her in virtual form. And if you think it's bad now, then just wait until these sexbots get a little more realistic and the price comes down. Sexbots will be superior to a feminist in every way.
One MAJOR reason I'm cautious about marriage. Porn addiction is pervasive even among married men; it doesn't just stop once they are married. Porn addiction reduces need for intimacy with real woman including wife. There is no way a wife can compete with porn or sexbot, especially if the man prefers younger women and as the wife gets older. Wives do not want to be intimate with husbands if the husband is looking at porn; I guess it is just a bad cycle. Both female and male sexbots will become more common in the future; they are developing sexbots in a way where it is more pleasurable to have sex with a sexbot than a real human. A person can design his/her own sexbot with favorite criteria, and they can be fine tuned into being submissive slaves.
 
Jun 22, 2020
1,231
741
113
Australia
When we had our first child, my husband and I collectively made the decision for me to be a homemaker. I will be the first to admit there are long days some days when I find myself getting jealous of women who choose a career and seem to have more of a social life during the work day, but ultimately I think I get so much more satisfaction and I'm happier overall with the choice we made because I feel like I'm fulfilling a deeper purpose with my family. I definitely feel bad for other women on the other side of the fence who made different choices because it's hard to go back.

Also after reading through this thread, which is based on how women over 40 feel, I can't help but wonder if there is the same kind of issue with men, or is it a bigger deal with us (women)? I'm curious if any men have that perspective. Maybe since men are just more traditionally career driven, it's different. But it seems like if there are a lot of single women out there in need of partners, the same should be true for men! :)
The issue is definitely with both men and women... I was discussing this with TheIndianGirl earlier in this thread...

Be grateful that you have the choice to be with your family.
Most couples require the income of both parents leaving the kids with a 3rd party.
Women used to have the choice to work or raise their kids as the mans wage was enough...
But women got tricked into thinking that fulfillment in life is in your job... This almost doubled the workforce and kept wages low.
So now most women can't stay at home, they have to work.

Would you have rather been working or raising your kids? I only know one woman that said she would rather work...
When i asked my mum this question she started crying saying that she wished she could of been with us...
Like, wow... I wasn't expecting that reaction... After all these years she still felt horrible about that... It really infuriates me
I feel like society stole my mum from me and my sis... They stole her love right when we needed it the most...
And their stealing most mothers away from their children
 
Mar 1, 2021
85
81
18
Man's perspective:
I love to hear about women that reject feminism, take care to their men and homeschool their children. Hat's off to you! Society depends on you! Without you civilization itself will soon collapse. But feminist women who reject their God given role? Career women? They disgust me! I have zero respect for them. I can't even stand to be anywhere near them.

As to the problem of so many single women in need of partners? I'm pretty confident I know the answer. It's two parts. One is indeed the presence of feminism. No actual man wants to be married to a feminist - who is invariably going to cheat on him, then divorce him, and take his kids and all his money. The other big contributor is porn. Guys get addicted to the dopamine rush of seeing a naked woman and masturbating to it. It reduces the drive to actually go out and get a real woman when all they have to do is close their eyes and have her in virtual form. And if you think it's bad now, then just wait until these sexbots get a little more realistic and the price comes down. Sexbots will be superior to a feminist in every way.

So my advise to young women: be the anti-feminist! Separate yourself as much as possible from your feminist peers. Reject everything they say and do. Hit the gym, and eat right. Reject the temptation to sleep around. Learn to enjoy cooking and taking care of a house. You will be mocked by most all women and lots of sissified men. But if you keep at it, I'm confident that you will eventually find a good man that you can raise a family with. And I truly believe that there is no greater joy than that.
Thank you. As a woman I can tell you it is just as infuriating to be criticized for the choices that I have made. There was a time when I liked the idea of feminism because I just associated it with women's rights, which have come a long way in the last hundred years. But today I feel like it has a totally different meaning. Liberal feminists seem like they are just on a power trip and they want to tell me how I should be and control my life even more than a man would have a hundred years ago. "Feminism" just seems toxic now and there are too many things about it that directly contradict the Bible. I truly feel bad for those people because I know they will never have the fulfillment I have taking care of my family and also my faith in Christ.

I also agree it's too bad more women don't have this option. It is a struggle for us at times, but we make it work with a lot of budgeting. We also live in a really rural area with low cost of living. Maybe with the pandemic, more families will get out of big cities and it will get easier.
 
Mar 1, 2021
85
81
18
The issue is definitely with both men and women... I was discussing this with TheIndianGirl earlier in this thread...

Be grateful that you have the choice to be with your family.
Most couples require the income of both parents leaving the kids with a 3rd party.
Women used to have the choice to work or raise their kids as the mans wage was enough...
But women got tricked into thinking that fulfillment in life is in your job... This almost doubled the workforce and kept wages low.
So now most women can't stay at home, they have to work.

Would you have rather been working or raising your kids? I only know one woman that said she would rather work...
When i asked my mum this question she started crying saying that she wished she could of been with us...
Like, wow... I wasn't expecting that reaction... After all these years she still felt horrible about that... It really infuriates me
I feel like society stole my mum from me and my sis... They stole her love right when we needed it the most...
And their stealing most mothers away from their children
Thank you for sharing your perspective on that. I'm really sorry to hear it worked out that way, but I think it also shows you just how much your mom loved you. Hearing that definitely makes me feel even better about the choices we've made too.
 
Jul 9, 2020
846
492
63
One MAJOR reason I'm cautious about marriage. Porn addiction is pervasive even among married men; it doesn't just stop once they are married. Porn addiction reduces need for intimacy with real woman including wife. There is no way a wife can compete with porn or sexbot, especially if the man prefers younger women and as the wife gets older. Wives do not want to be intimate with husbands if the husband is looking at porn; I guess it is just a bad cycle. Both female and male sexbots will become more common in the future; they are developing sexbots in a way where it is more pleasurable to have sex with a sexbot than a real human. A person can design his/her own sexbot with favorite criteria, and they can be fine tuned into being submissive slaves.
Your fears are legitimate. Really. You could get married and your husband could be a porn addict. He could also wind up being a drug user with a propensity toward beating his wife and kids. He could also be a serial philanderer or a deadbeat that's still dependent on his parents, etc. All these and more are possibilities.

But at a certain point, I think you've got to put some trust in the God you serve. Seek Him. Seek His will. Submit your desires to His, pray about it, and then take a little step of faith. Sure, it might go poorly. But consigning yourself to growing old alone because of fear strikes me as worse. Give yourself a chance to win.
 
Mar 1, 2021
85
81
18
I didn't realize porn addiction that was this serious until I read this thread. I can't even get my mind around how that would hurt a marriage, but I did some searches and you are right about it being a problem. I had no idea. Wow. It feels like everything is against marriage these days. So sad.