wishing for death

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Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
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some people might recall Nicky Cruz teen challenge by evangelist David wilkerson.
Nicky Cruz was puerto riccan and involved in gangs and witchcraft. He was a hard core hater. He hated himself so much he wanted to die. He wanted everyone else to die too! The last thing he wanted to do was become a christian.

Nicky was about to kill someone with a knife. David challenged him in Times Square. He said if you cut me up into a million pieces, all those million pieces would still cry out I love you.
he then took his shoes off and gave him to him?! and walked round Time square in his socks.

God works in mysterious ways. Nicky was converted. Today nicky Cruz has a huge ministry.

lol I love this story
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
59,812
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This is the peace I have:
The Divine is not petty; therefore it does not care if you pursue it or not. It IS. Whether you are worshiping it or not. It is not dependent on it. Your free will is ACTUALLY free will. Not the fear based "Choose me or Burn".
Therefore I do not really care that I don't know what happens when I die.
Not everyone subscribes to that choose or burn dogma. Some find it wholly repugnant, being neither aligned with the Truth of God's revealed written Word, nor His character. Free will is a misnomer. We have self will, either aligned with God's will, or not :D

Since giving this religion up and looking into others, I have come to see the exaggeration and false things we were taught. "christians are the only persecuted people" - no - actually every religion is persecuted if they are a minority. The reason Christians are ALWAYS persecuted everywhere is because they cannot coexist without preaching and trying to convert people. Never satisfied to show respect and dignity to other cultures and beliefs. The fact that I believed I could "compleely" know something as unfathomable as the mystery of spiritality and life after death is so arrogant and I blush admitting that I subscribed to it.
I don't know who taught you those false things... but I am glad you have left empty religion behind.
 

Belka

Junior Member
Aug 24, 2017
226
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@Heart_Melody

I want to comment to say that your understanding of the Scriptures regarding rape is incorrect (as is that of many people, unfortunately). God does not condone rape at all, in fact rape was punishable by death. Please read the below (it's not a long read):
From: https://www.livingwaters.com/does-the-bible-say-a-rape-victim-must-marry-her-rapist/

“Where is, ‘Thou shalt not rape’…?” —Pat C., Facebook question
While the Bible doesn’t say, “Thou shalt not rape” in the Ten Commandments, it is summed up in the essence of the moral Law, which says to love your neighbor as yourself. Love does not rape.

Hebrew criminal law considered rape such a serious crime that rapists were to be put to death:

“But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die” (Deuteronomy 22:25, KJV).​
Yet there are some who believe that the Scriptures say that the victim of the rapist had to marry him. He wasn’t to be punished, but to be rewarded with the woman as his prize. Here is the verse used to justify that belief:

“If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and LAY HOLD ON HER, and lie with her, and they be found; Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days”(Deuteronomy 22:28-29, KJV, caps added).​
Unbelievably, (in the light of the previous verse saying that a rapist was to be put to death) a number of modern translations interpret “lay hold on her” as rape.

The Hebrew word “tapas” means to “take hold of something,” to grasp it in hand, and (by application) to capture or seize something.

In Genesis 4:21, it used for “handling” the flute.

If a man raped a woman, he was to be put to death. Killed. That means he is dead (no longer alive), and a dead man can’t marry the woman he raped. He can’t marry her because he’s dead.

So for those who can figure out that dead men don’t marry women, coupled with the fact that the verse says “if THEY be found,” implying both were guilty, this verse obviously refers to consensual sex.

It’s similar to what we nowadays call a “shotgun” wedding. They had to get married.

__


There is a similar misunderstanding about slavery described in the Bible, and many people don't understand it the way it's meant to be understood -- it requires actual studying of the Scriptures and the cultural context, not just "plain reading". (I actually looked into it myself because I was confused and wanted to know the truth about the matter, just like with the "rape" verses.)

I suggest this article (it's long but it's quite exhaustive) if you or anyone else ever wants to read about it: https://emergencenj.org/blog/2019/01/04/does-the-bible-condone-slavery
(Though I know you most likely won't, which is OK, perhaps one day you'll come back to this and read about it)

Lastly, we do need the Holy Spirit to understand the Scriptures and to know God's nature. It is not a bunch of bologna and it's not arrogant to say so. The Word of God says so and there are many, many people who can attest to the truth of this:

1 Corinthians 2:10-14
But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit. For the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God. For what man knows the things of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so no one knows the things of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God.

These things we also speak, not in words which man’s wisdom teaches but which the Holy Spirit teaches, comparing spiritual things with spiritual. But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.

__

May the Father's will be done in your life in Jesus' name. May He lead you back to Him so you can finally meet Him for real and experience the love He has for you.
Take care of yourself!
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
59,812
29,190
113
I don’t understand why people receive fear instilling teaching when God is all about the prince of peace. He loves us so much and we all are the ones that twist things up.

I would never see anyone damned because I try to see everyone how God sees us. I will say He gives us free will to make choices that gives us consequences good and bad. Eternity is a long time... much much more than on earth. I don’t say this to make anyone fearful, but in hopes to embrace love, peace, and security in Christ. He did all the work, all we have to do is accept it and try to live for Him.

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

God is love and is perfect... He drives out fear.


1 John:4-18 :)
 
H

Heart_Melody

Guest
@Heart_Melody

I want to comment to say that your understanding of the Scriptures regarding rape is incorrect (as is that of many people, unfortunately). God does not condone rape at all, in fact rape was punishable by death. Please read the below (it's not a long read):
From: https://www.livingwaters.com/does-the-bible-say-a-rape-victim-must-marry-her-rapist/

“Where is, ‘Thou shalt not rape’…?” —Pat C., Facebook question
While the Bible doesn’t say, “Thou shalt not rape” in the Ten Commandments, it is summed up in the essence of the moral Law, which says to love your neighbor as yourself. Love does not rape.

Hebrew criminal law considered rape such a serious crime that rapists were to be put to death:

“But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die” (Deuteronomy 22:25, KJV).​
Yet there are some who believe that the Scriptures say that the victim of the rapist had to marry him. He wasn’t to be punished, but to be rewarded with the woman as his prize. Here is the verse used to justify that belief:

“If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and LAY HOLD ON HER, and lie with her, and they be found; Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days”(Deuteronomy 22:28-29, KJV, caps added).​
Unbelievably, (in the light of the previous verse saying that a rapist was to be put to death) a number of modern translations interpret “lay hold on her” as rape.

The Hebrew word “tapas” means to “take hold of something,” to grasp it in hand, and (by application) to capture or seize something.

In Genesis 4:21, it used for “handling” the flute.

If a man raped a woman, he was to be put to death. Killed. That means he is dead (no longer alive), and a dead man can’t marry the woman he raped. He can’t marry her because he’s dead.

So for those who can figure out that dead men don’t marry women, coupled with the fact that the verse says “if THEY be found,” implying both were guilty, this verse obviously refers to consensual sex.

It’s similar to what we nowadays call a “shotgun” wedding. They had to get married.

__


There is a similar misunderstanding about slavery described in the Bible, and many people don't understand it the way it's meant to be understood -- it requires actual studying of the Scriptures and the cultural context, not just "plain reading". (I actually looked into it myself because I was confused and wanted to know the truth about the matter, just like with the "rape" verses.)

I suggest this article (it's long but it's quite exhaustive) if you or anyone else ever wants to read about it: https://emergencenj.org/blog/2019/01/04/does-the-bible-condone-slavery
(Though I know you most likely won't, which is OK, perhaps one day you'll come back to this and read about it)

Lastly, we do need the Holy Spirit to understand the Scriptures and to know God's nature. It is not a bunch of bologna and it's not arrogant to say so. The Word of God says so and there are many, many people who can attest to the truth of this:

1 Corinthians 2:10-14
But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit. For the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God. For what man knows the things of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so no one knows the things of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God.

These things we also speak, not in words which man’s wisdom teaches but which the Holy Spirit teaches, comparing spiritual things with spiritual. But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.

__

May the Father's will be done in your life in Jesus' name. May He lead you back to Him so you can finally meet Him for real and experience the love He has for you.
Take care of yourself!

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 states: If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her - In the same passage it also states that in some cases the woman must be stones because she clearly didn't scream enough - implying I am guessing that she must have enjoyed herself.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,608
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I did not realize that everyone was still commenting on this post.
I happened to realize it as I was just curious to see if there were any messages on here I should respond to.

What about when you find out that Heaven and Hell do exist, and that it is not about empty religion but it’s about a real relationship shop with the Saviour who loves you and gave Himself for you? XX

Well on an update note - I got much much worse that when I first had sent this message.
I saw my physician and he recognized that I needed to see his Counselor - We speak about once a month now.
Not long after meeting her I decided that Christianity just is not the way for me to go any longer.

And since I have left this behind I have been happier and more at peace than I can remember. I do thank you all for your encouraging messages. For reaching out and sharing your wisdom and experiences and I do really hope that they will help people. It looks like many people have read through the thread and been reminded either of one thing or another thing.


I have a hard time coming to grips with the fact that I spent so many years on a religion/practice that brought me so little joy - based on a fear instilling teaching. But I mean, fretting is also not smart, because I would just waste even more time that I could have spent following and practicing something that I belong to.


Realizing that this somehow makes me damned in all your eyes, I have to say - I am also okay with that. I do not want to waste this life being miserable and then find out that Hell and Heaven never even existed. What a waste of time, for me.
But naturally if this is your path - if it truly delights you to do your devotions, to defend the bible and the things you believe in, then that does make me happy for you. It just isn't for me.


So thanks once more for kindness here - I did not want to disappear without telling you how thankful I truly am for the time you all took to speak a prayer, to write a note or message to me and to encourage me at a time when I was so low.


Love,
HM
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
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Hey Heart Melody, it’s a deception to believe that Christianity was your problem; don’t be robbed of the most precious thing- He is the Pearl of great price and nothing else compares 💞 x
 

Belka

Junior Member
Aug 24, 2017
226
231
43
My last piece of advice is to seek God for yourself and to take the time to study the Scriptures in depth. I had a lot of misconceptions about God and His ways even as I was reading the Bible as a new believer and thought that He was cruel. It took time and prayer and research to have my mind and heart changed and to finally be able to see His beauty and goodness.

Once you truly get to know the Holy Spirit you realize that He is the most loving, kind, and patient Person in the whole universe. No one loves more than Jesus. And if you think that your moral standard is higher than God's, you are mistaken. He is the Perfect Judge and His mercy is perfect. But most of the time we just misunderstand the Scriptures and the intent of the Lord.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
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No I was a Wiccan most my life before being inroduced to this faith by a family I had no chance knowing. And wouldn't have unless I converted to christianity. Bu in the end they only would like me if I jumped at their bidding no matter how miserable I was.

So I will do what makes me happy :) And go back to who I was always meant to be. I have learned a lot during practicing this religion - I will take the good I learned and apply it in my life- but let go of all the heart break and abuse I endured at the hand of many christian organizations and work places.

I am confident enough now to be who I am meant to be instead of who I think my family wanted me to be I think- confident that if they will love me, they can love me for who I am - and if not -then I am not loosing anything, don't you agree?Same with god really.
God does love you Heart Melody, so much, that He died for you. Does this mean nothing to you? 😔 x
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
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Well, the Bible says that before Jesus returns there will be a great falling away, and here it is folks.
It seems things have to get really bad in our lives, for many of us, before we realise how much we need Him.
I hope that HeartMelody does not harden her heart in the day of adversity, but that she always remembers she can call upon Him and be saved, by trusting Him.
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,052
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Deuteronomy 22:28-29 states: If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her - In the same passage it also states that in some cases the woman must be stones because she clearly didn't scream enough - implying I am guessing that she must have enjoyed herself.
I can't find the last thing you are referring to.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,608
1,317
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Deuteronomy 22:28-29 states: If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her - In the same passage it also states that in some cases the woman must be stones because she clearly didn't scream enough - implying I am guessing that she must have enjoyed herself.
If a verse in the Bible seems unrighteous it’s usually an inaccurate translation or there is a lack of understanding somewhere. One thing is for sure, God is righteous and everything He does is based on love because the Bible tells us He IS love. We are mere humans, and I personally have found that when there have been verses that troubled me, I have asked the Lord for help and understanding. Most times, I eventually find that a revelation comes to me one way or another, and very rarely, I have to just trust Him, which I know I can, because I KNOW Him, and He is so real and amazing that words fail me.
I realise it can be very frustrating at times when we don’t understand something but the question is, Do we trust Him? Will we? Because it is impossible to please Him without trusting Him.
The truth with you, Heart Melody, seems to be that you were following religion, thinking it was Christianity... because if you had really known Him, I fail to see how you could ever abandon Him indefinitely, especially after what He did.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,608
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Deuteronomy 22:28-29 states: If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her - In the same passage it also states that in some cases the woman must be stones because she clearly didn't scream enough - implying I am guessing that she must have enjoyed herself.
I also don’t think the verse is implying what you say it is. Please quote where the verse is found then we can discuss it; because it is important that if a man is wrongly accused of rape then this too needs to be assessed.
 

Kireina

Well-known member
Aug 26, 2020
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I think she left already I can see that there is a word "guest" under her username...but there is a possibility that she'll come back and will read all of the responses here...one day....🕗


The best thing we could do is pray for God's continued favor and for God's light to shine on her way and that one day God would bring her back.... 😇🙏🏼

Please Take care @Hear_Melody God bless you ❤
 

BlessedByGod

Well-known member
Sep 28, 2019
12,196
7,026
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I think she left already I can see that there is a word "guest" under her username...but there is a possibility that she'll come back and will read all of the responses here...one day....🕗


The best thing we could do is pray for God's continued favor and for God's light to shine on her way and that one day God would bring her back.... 😇🙏🏼

Please Take care @Hear_Melody God bless you ❤
I couldn't agree more...
 

Johari

Junior Member
Dec 24, 2013
87
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I saw this video in my feed and thought of you OP.

Edit: I just read the previous comments...well even if she's not a member maybe she'll still see this video.
 

BlessedByGod

Well-known member
Sep 28, 2019
12,196
7,026
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I saw this video in my feed and thought of you OP.

Edit: I just read the previous comments...well even if she's not a member maybe she'll still see this video.
Or maybe someone else finding this way to this thread could use this (haven't watched it) or all of the other fine Blessings and Love that they are needing to hear. May she be Blesses to have her heart be opened to the truth that can and will save her life and bring her peace in God.