Hey Court - your story reads a little like a cliff note. A lot of information packed in, so help me understand. So you were married to your husband who was involved in a crime and three weeks later (after you found out, I guess) you filed a restraining order. A question here would be - typically a restraining order is meant to protect you from physical harm - so were you in danger of being harmed?). Then, did your father pass away while you were married or did he pass before you were married which is the reason you weren't thinking straight with your married choice?
So, you were divorced and you agreed to be married again around Thanksgiving (was this a year ago?) because he was apparently still in your life. He drugged you and you were remarried. So - did he drug you without your knowledge? Or did you knowingly do some drugs with him? And once under the influence, did you go along with being married again or was the marriage forced upon you? And just so I know, what happened with the restraining order during this time?
Then, you were divorced a second time. So, a question might be - did your husband serve any time in prison? How long a period of time did all this transpire. Is he still in your life and are you willing to wait for him to "clean up his life"? Are there any indications he's doing so?
There are a couple of biblical allowances for divorce - one is sexual immorality or more explicitly adultery and another is an unequally yoked marriage, meaning that one partner is not a believer and abandons the marriage. If you consider these two reasons carefully, I think you could understand the ramifications of each and how far reaching they are.
Marriage is considered by God as a "one flesh" union and it's meant to be an unbreakable covenant between us and God. It's an important symbol as God is meant to be the Husband and His church as the Bride. When a covenant between you and your husband is broken, it symbolizes a break in His union as well.
I'm not going to talk about your ex husband here - I'm going to talk about you. When your husband committed a crime, did you feel the one-ness of marriage? When you filed a restraining order was your "union before God" a consideration? When you were under the influence of drugs, did you think about God's covenant that He made to us before you were married a second time?
Neither you or I are in the heart changing business, Court. This is God's territory. But by our own introspection and conviction, I believe that by living a life as a Bride of God we are symbolic of our covenant to Him. And because we were "touched" by God in His image, we are also symbolic to other people as well. This in itself is witness. In your case this could serve as witness to your ex. Or maybe it won't. His choices are his.
Finally - you are already divorced. You made this choice before knowing the answers you seek and there is always always consequence. We are by the Grace of our God of Israel the forgiven sinner, but the sin itself plays on. So, I would read His Word and understand Matthew 19:9 and 1 Corinthians 7 and see exactly where you fall but mostly where you're going from here.
God speed Court!
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