Forget it. You sound annoyed.
I actually don’t have any friends left to talk to. I’m sincerely not trying to throw a self-pity party, I really don’t have a person to talk with anymore. And for a number of reasons, struggling with clinical depression, addiction, taking meds, my brain chemistry has actually been screwed up and i feel basically dead inside. Im not making things up. I genuinely seek God’s healing grace because I genuinely want it with everything i have left. I got nowhere else to turn. That’s all.