Is it a sin to live your whole life alone? (socially isolated)

[clarance91]

No school. no job, no friends since i was 14. Never been with a women. Never talk to anyone. No internet friends. I only go out when its dark. I cant go out without hiding my body and face with a hoodie and cap.

I have therapists but its not helping.

The reason to why i am doing this is because i am 1 of 10 on the look scale and is very weird. I am too ashamed over myself to be part of the society. And people bully me all the time/make fun of me, in internet and also irl, so why should i even bother talking to people, get a job etc when i will be bullied even more? I have 0 % to be in a relationship with a women or getting a friend so its pointless for me to be part of the society.

I tried to fix my flaws, i have 100+ flaws, but nothing worked to fix my flaws.
I feel very bad, i have been depressed for 12 years. but i will not end my social isolation, i will keep living like this until i die.
So my question is how i deal with this sadness, i want to be happy with my life.

Is it a sin to live like this?

 

[JaumeJ]

No school. no job, no friends since i was 14. Never been with a women. Never talk to anyone. No internet friends. I only go out when its dark. I cant go out without hiding my body and face with a hoodie and cap.

I have therapists but its not helping.

The reason to why i am doing this is because i am 1 of 10 on the look scale and is very weird. I am too ashamed over myself to be part of the society. And people bully me all the time/make fun of me, in internet and also irl, so why should i even bother talking to people, get a job etc when i will be bullied even more? I have 0 % to be in a relationship with a women or getting a friend so its pointless for me to be part of the society.

I tried to fix my flaws, i have 100+ flaws, but nothing worked to fix my flaws.
I feel very bad, i have been depressed for 12 years. but i will not end my social isolation, i will keep living like this until i die.
So my question is how i deal with this sadness, i want to be happy with my life.

Is it a sin to live like this?

It is not a sin. When I came to the cross I was even told I would be pretty much alone in my wlk here in this age.

Sorry to do a "look-at-me" here, but it seems relative to your plight. It sounds dreadful and fearful to me, providing all you say is true. No, I am not doubting your word, just kind of harboring the hope that you are because of the manner you describe the situation.

You are not anywhere on a scale of visual acceptability with man in the sight of God, you are beautiful in His eyes. Never doubt this.

As I age I have come to realize how everything, even things that seem bad, are a gift, and every evil overcome is another step to the glory of god, to His throne.

This is going to sound odd, but, when you pray and honestly as our Father for Hi moving in your life, try to muster up the strength to thank Him regardless for your being. I know this sounds awful, but there is a response in this action. I should not, thereefore I will not list the many awful things I thank God for, and somehow they become less burdensome. We do not forget but we do learn from everything.

I do not believe you need to go hoody, ever. May you be given super strength and wisdom from our Father in all areas so you may walk freely and in joy the Way given you personally by our blessed Jesus, amen-

 

[RickyZ]

My first question is, have you been here before? Your post is almost identical to one posted by another member a few months back.

Second observation is, you say you want to be happy yet you also say you are not going to leave your unhappy place. Sorry, that's just not possible.

Is it a sin? God tells us to do for others before ourselves. Is that possible to do in isolation? God loves us as we are ... so shouldn't you find some love for yourself if God does? Or do you make God out to be a liar by claiming you are unlovable?

Lastly, the issue could be your environment. If an ugly duckling walks into a pretty-people's party yes you will feel ugly. But how about if you volunteered at something like a burn ward - they will probably think you are beautiful compared to their scars.

It's said that beauty is skin deep, while ugly goes clear to the bone. If you make what's inside of you beautiful, it will show outwardly to others who will find you beautiful as well.

Maybe you should watch "Shallow Hal".

 

[trofimus]

No, it is not a sin.

On the other hand, you can socialize quite well through internet, like on this site, if you like. Most of us are anonymous here.

 

[JaumeJ]

Rickyz is spot on in his reasoning, however there can be circumstances for each of that are for the individual's good, even for salvation's sake.

It is written God will in no wise turn away a broken heart. Min was so, and I turned to god, and He heard me and entered into me, but my heart was broken for the sake of what mankind wa s doing to himself. I knew there was nothing I could truly do to alleviate the pain of innocents around this world, and He showed me there is a blessed and joyous outcome to all in spite of appearances.

I suppose this was a graphic lesson just for me never to judge by appearances but with right judgment. Yes, God is always good, and He is always the source of understanding and wisdom

Now is your pain strictly for yourself, or are you concerned with how people are to each other and to you? I believe your situation is certainly heart-breaking, but again, is it strictly for yourself or for all men? The latter is what I see, so remember what Jesus said on the cross after all His agony for each of us, even in His abject agony He cried out, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." We must all attempt to be the same in our individual agonies and say, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."

 

[Zmouth]

Yes it is a sin or you wouldn't be asking, but it isn't yours but ours if you are not back in school after summer break.

 

[Mel85]

I tried to fix my flaws, i have 100+ flaws, but nothing worked to fix my flaws

Hello, thanks for sharing, what stood out to me in your post was the part I quoted in bold...... the fact that you are “trying to fix yourself” makes things even more harder for yourself because we cannot fix ourselves - but the Good news is that JESUS can.

I’ve been in dark times of having the mentality of “trying to fix my issues/problems/myself” and always ended up either making things worse or not fixing it at all. When I surrendered to Jesus, I asked Him to take complete control of my life and I trusted that He would. This also meant that I knew and believed that He would fix all my problems. It wasn’t pretty to begin with and took time to heal through forgiveness but through Christ, He lead me out of those “unfixable” issues/problems that I struggled with and gave me Hope and righteous direction through the Holy Spirit.

The beautiful thing about God is that He wants you, as broken, lost, depressed, anti social as you say or feel, God wants ALL of you.... 2Cor 12:9 “But he (Jesus) said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

I encourage you to surrender all to God and that He is the only source of Hope and guidance in our lives. He is the Light in the darkness that we face in this corrupted world. Trust in Him and He will set your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).

May the peace of Jesus be with you forever.

 

[so-jesus-e-deus]

Is it a sin to live like this?

Yes. After all, how are we going to love the neighbor as Jesus love us socially isolated?

 

[mar09]

Yes. After all, how are we going to love the neighbor as Jesus love us socially isolated?

I was thinking along these lines too.

 

[tourist]

No school. no job, no friends since i was 14. Never been with a women. Never talk to anyone. No internet friends. I only go out when its dark. I cant go out without hiding my body and face with a hoodie and cap.

I have therapists but its not helping.

The reason to why i am doing this is because i am 1 of 10 on the look scale and is very weird. I am too ashamed over myself to be part of the society. And people bully me all the time/make fun of me, in internet and also irl, so why should i even bother talking to people, get a job etc when i will be bullied even more? I have 0 % to be in a relationship with a women or getting a friend so its pointless for me to be part of the society.

I tried to fix my flaws, i have 100+ flaws, but nothing worked to fix my flaws.
I feel very bad, i have been depressed for 12 years. but i will not end my social isolation, i will keep living like this until i die.
So my question is how i deal with this sadness, i want to be happy with my life.

Is it a sin to live like this?

No, but it is indeed sad and it would be a tragedy to live your entire life this way. You have no reason at all to be ashamed of yourself or your appearance, if people can't accept you as you are then that's their problem. About the flaws, these are only your perceived flaws but some of them probably aren't flaws at all. The remaining true flaws can only be addressed over a period of time with the grace of God and your willingness to accept change in your life. It was very sad for me to read your post and I will certainly say a prayer for you. God has big plans for you and I will pray for God to give you the strength and courage to take the first step out the door and into the world.

 

[Deade]

Well Clarance, our looks are always skewed by our biases. Anyone that stares into a mirror long enough will dread looking any longer. Just make yourself presentable and think no more about it. Instead, build your character.

You can even start that online where you character is all they will see. Quit thinking negatively about yourself and work on those social skills. Ask God for help--He likes that.

 

[Jewel5712]

No school. no job, no friends since i was 14. Never been with a women. Never talk to anyone. No internet friends. I only go out when its dark. I cant go out without hiding my body and face with a hoodie and cap.

I have therapists but its not helping.

The reason to why i am doing this is because i am 1 of 10 on the look scale and is very weird. I am too ashamed over myself to be part of the society. And people bully me all the time/make fun of me, in internet and also irl, so why should i even bother talking to people, get a job etc when i will be bullied even more? I have 0 % to be in a relationship with a women or getting a friend so its pointless for me to be part of the society.

I tried to fix my flaws, i have 100+ flaws, but nothing worked to fix my flaws.
I feel very bad, i have been depressed for 12 years. but i will not end my social isolation, i will keep living like this until i die.
So my question is how i deal with this sadness, i want to be happy with my life.

Is it a sin to live like this?

Please dont take this for lack of compassion..its NOT a sin but its a waste of a life that Jesus died for!

 

[pottersclay]

My friend you being ripped off. Funny weird strange I'm sure you not alone. You are just as important to God as the next. And just as loved.
Time to get over yourself and on with the mission. Isolation is not the answer, we were born with a purpose regardless of our set backs. God chooses the foolish to confound the wise.
Now the God that I serve is the God of the impossible....he makes beauty from ashes....he breathes life into dust....he raises the dead .....he humbles the proud....he give Grace to the humble.....do you know him?....
Rise up in faith my friend...take hold of that thing God has promised you.
He equips the called he doesn't call the equiped. He's a chain breaker, a prison shaking God.
Now he knew you and formed you before you were in the womb and gave you purpose.
So stop saying am I ready for the world and start saying.....by the holy spirit is the world ready for me (you).

God bless .....potter

 

[Iconoclast]

Why are you trying to conform to the worlds standards and not God's? There is always a way.
You feel you are ugly? date a blind girl...it is the persons spirit that you commune with.
look for the inner beauty of those you meet.

 

[JPPT1974]

Hey I am single, never married, no children, do not plan on it. But really love being single and happy and focusing on Christ than be miserable and being married. Marriage is not for everybody. Just like being single is not for everybody. Only follow God in what He wants or how to live your life.

 

[Iconoclast]

Hey I am single, never married, no children, do not plan on it. But really love being single and happy and focusing on Christ than be miserable and being married. Marriage is not for everybody. Just like being single is not for everybody. Only follow God in what He wants or how to live your life.

7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.
8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I.
9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
32 But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:
33 But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.
34 There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.
35 And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.

 

[theanointedsinner]

what would Apostle Paul think about this in 1 Cor 7:27 - if you are single, do not seek to be married

 

[OneFaith]

No school. no job, no friends since i was 14. Never been with a women. Never talk to anyone. No internet friends. I only go out when its dark. I cant go out without hiding my body and face with a hoodie and cap.

I have therapists but its not helping.

The reason to why i am doing this is because i am 1 of 10 on the look scale and is very weird. I am too ashamed over myself to be part of the society. And people bully me all the time/make fun of me, in internet and also irl, so why should i even bother talking to people, get a job etc when i will be bullied even more? I have 0 % to be in a relationship with a women or getting a friend so its pointless for me to be part of the society.

I tried to fix my flaws, i have 100+ flaws, but nothing worked to fix my flaws.
I feel very bad, i have been depressed for 12 years. but i will not end my social isolation, i will keep living like this until i die.
So my question is how i deal with this sadness, i want to be happy with my life.

Is it a sin to live like this?

"He who knows the good he ought to do yet chooses not to do it, sins." We are to make money for the poor if we can. We are to go to church to encourage others and worship God. People such as the elephant man, and Rocky Dennis made friends. Everyone at church is supposed to make friends of God's children.

Jesus was purposely unbecoming so that no one would be attracted to Him in that way. He was without girlfriend or wife His entire earthly life. Paul says it is better not to marry so you can avoid marital problems and concentrate on the Lords work. But if you can't, that you should marry. No matter how hideous you think you look (which doesn't matter, and I doubt is as bad as you say) there is a girl who thinks she looks worse, and would be happy to be with you. Haven't you ever seen the movie Shrek? I remember the movie about the elephant man, and thinking I would have been his friend. I don't care what people look like, i care about how kind they are.

You assume, but you don't know you will live the rest of your life this way. I was in depression for many years, decades, i too thought it would never change. But now when I'm reminded of it, I think "oh yeah, I remember that." I took the focus off of me- "What happened to me? What are my wants and needs?" Turned into "What happened to them? What are their wants and needs? I can certainly identify with their pain. How can I help them?"

We all have a cross, a thorn. God called Moses to be a public speaker when he had a problem with his mouth. God said "Who made man's mouth? Was it not I?" What we view as obstacles God gave us for our story- our personal testimony of how we brought glory to God. You are no exception. God has a purpose for you. Take your focus off yourself and focus on what He wants you to do. Every christian's story has an enemy and/or an obstacle.

 

[Dan58]

No school. no job, no friends since i was 14. Never been with a women. Never talk to anyone. No internet friends. I only go out when its dark. I cant go out without hiding my body and face with a hoodie and cap.

Its no sin to live your life alone, but complete isolation and remaining inactive may be a 'pride' issue? You shouldn't hide from the world, force yourself to get out and live, and try not to care what others may think or say. You wrote; "I will not end my social isolation, i will keep living like this until i die. So my question is how i deal with this sadness?" You deal with it by ending the cause, which is your determination to stay reclusive and solitary. Appearance is just one aspect of who you are. Intellect, personality, and carrying yourself with confidence are all attractive attributes.. And as far as women go, not all of them rank very high on the looks scale either.

"Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven" (Matthew 5: 14-16)

 

[glf1]

Below is about Jesus
Is 53:2,3 "For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him. He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not."

The Lord understands better than anyone!

Mt 11:28-30 "Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

Give the hurt to Jesus along with yourself. Seek him, he is found in the scriptures by the ministry of the Spirit. and he promises: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.