I think you're missing my point, which began in a conversation with loveme1.
Just knowing what I am supposed to do and how I am supposed to be does not make me
be that way. And in fact, if I try hard to be and do that way, I only fool myself by thinking my outward behavior is holiness.
Stunned, you have put yourself back under law by trying to control behavior.
You are not a murderer...you have a new nature. What you are not seeing is the renewed mind. These things that you are angry about are justified to be angry over. Someone isn't treating you right. Confrontation and discussing should be the way to settle.
Have you confronted your mother? And then I think that you look at others and see that they are not condemned in mind as you are allowing yourself to be, and that makes you angry too. But, this is actually at the Lord. Like why don't they do what I am doing.
Jesus already made the way for you to be free. Free from condemnation that comes from our own heart. That is by identifying with Jesus and His resurrection life only.
Then in working out your salvation....bless your enemies. If that is all you can do because of the process of renewing your mind, then that is enough for now. Eventually your conscience will agree with the testimony of the Cross, the blood, and the Resurrection life that is found only from Him.
This is what you came here in this thread first with, and you are still struggling with it. So eternally-grateful was correct. He saw beyond your words.
McGee gave you good advice. It's temptation and the devil is jabbing at you with all kinds of darts.