I called my mom at 5 a.m. and asked her how people do this.
She was only sort of awake, but she didn't ask what I meant. She just said, "Well, sometimes they call their mothers in the wee hours of the morning...and sometimes they just cry, Cristen. That's what people do when it hurts. And when they stop crying, they blow their nose, feel silly, and get through the day."
I told her I was sorry for calling so early, hung up, and went and got a roll of toilet paper...because Kleenex is too fancy...and sat down and cried.
And then after a while, the sun starting peeking over the mountains, and I seemed to be all cried out, so I blew my nose, felt a little silly, and started a pot of coffee.
My sister sent me a text message asking if I wanted to paint some of the decorations for her wedding.
My kids both woke up smiling and snugly.
This coffee is fabulous.
I'm okay.