Single forever
- Thread starter Kojikun
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At the expense of seeming a bit harsh, I'd like to say something to help you reset your mindset:
*No one owes you anything. Not even God.*
Out of God's abundant grace he provided himself as your savior. Isn't that enough? He died for you. Must he also pet all your feelings and provide you with everything you wish for in life?
Presuming that you ought to have things and that God is evil for not giving you what you desire is a significant level of arrogance. (I know this because I have also been this person). Why are you owed anything by God?
You might be saying, "But you don't know me. I'm such a good person who lives so solidly for God." He still owes you nothing.
OR You might be saying, "In this-and-that verse of the bible it says that God sees and rewards this-and-that." Again, God owes you nothing.
Any virtue we have is only a manifestation of the work of the Holy Spirit within us. Any good deed we do is only the right response to God's work of salvation for us.
You've basically attached yourself to a behavioristic cycle that implies that God is some kind of Santa in the sky rewarding you with presents for your good deeds. You've extended this expectation to Christian women, presuming that they are some kind of human vending machine--if you insert the right coinage and push the right buttons, you'll get what you want.
All of this is about you and your expectations. None of it is about God or Christian women.
I spent an unfortunate amount of my early adulthood discontent and slightly bitter because I'd been so good. I'd been a model daughter. I regularly deliberated about doing what was right...and then choosing it, even when it was hard. I had rejected all the frippery of the world--drinking, drugs, sex, etc. I had eschewed fun and embraced responsibility. Underneath all of my "goodness," was a hidden expectation. If I did all this, then God would surely give me what I desired. This attachment to such expectation led me to disappointment when God, in fact, did not give me all I desired. This disappointment made me distrustful of God and deeply unhappy.
Until I realized that I was at fault.
It was deeply painful to admit that I'd been doing good as a means to manipulate God. (I truly am invested in doing what is right). I had to see a part of myself that was wildly corrupted, control-seeking, and blaming. And *spoiler alert* doing this work did not result in me getting what I desired.
But it did free me. It freed me to love God more transparently. It freed me from seeing others as commodities. It freed me to love others in a way that benefits them regardless of my own gain.
I hope it has made me more like Jesus.
*No one owes you anything. Not even God.*
Out of God's abundant grace he provided himself as your savior. Isn't that enough? He died for you. Must he also pet all your feelings and provide you with everything you wish for in life?
Presuming that you ought to have things and that God is evil for not giving you what you desire is a significant level of arrogance. (I know this because I have also been this person). Why are you owed anything by God?
You might be saying, "But you don't know me. I'm such a good person who lives so solidly for God." He still owes you nothing.
OR You might be saying, "In this-and-that verse of the bible it says that God sees and rewards this-and-that." Again, God owes you nothing.
Any virtue we have is only a manifestation of the work of the Holy Spirit within us. Any good deed we do is only the right response to God's work of salvation for us.
You've basically attached yourself to a behavioristic cycle that implies that God is some kind of Santa in the sky rewarding you with presents for your good deeds. You've extended this expectation to Christian women, presuming that they are some kind of human vending machine--if you insert the right coinage and push the right buttons, you'll get what you want.
All of this is about you and your expectations. None of it is about God or Christian women.
I spent an unfortunate amount of my early adulthood discontent and slightly bitter because I'd been so good. I'd been a model daughter. I regularly deliberated about doing what was right...and then choosing it, even when it was hard. I had rejected all the frippery of the world--drinking, drugs, sex, etc. I had eschewed fun and embraced responsibility. Underneath all of my "goodness," was a hidden expectation. If I did all this, then God would surely give me what I desired. This attachment to such expectation led me to disappointment when God, in fact, did not give me all I desired. This disappointment made me distrustful of God and deeply unhappy.
Until I realized that I was at fault.
It was deeply painful to admit that I'd been doing good as a means to manipulate God. (I truly am invested in doing what is right). I had to see a part of myself that was wildly corrupted, control-seeking, and blaming. And *spoiler alert* doing this work did not result in me getting what I desired.
But it did free me. It freed me to love God more transparently. It freed me from seeing others as commodities. It freed me to love others in a way that benefits them regardless of my own gain.
I hope it has made me more like Jesus.
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Yes, I know he doesn't. He has given me plenty I dont deserve. I unfortunately get a tad dramatic when im backed into a corner. Its something I need to work on. Im taking a break from dating. Im looking to get a job so I spend less time thinking and more time doing things as my abundance of free time isnt helping me much. I always have some issue I struggle with as im a compulsive worrier.
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