Love Advice with Dr. Des

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
UCA4J

UCA4J

Banned
#121
Nov 15, 2020
1,897
362
83
Newcastle, NSW, Australia
#121
Ruby123 said:
Dear Dr Des,

This is a true story. I know a couple who just met exactly a month ago and have decided to get engaged. Am I the only one who thinks this is crazy? Apparently they feel that it was divinely orchestrated. The way they met, the astounding number of things they have in common, the number of boxes each tick, the comfortableness they feel with each other, the way they fit into each others family etc etc. Is this a recipe for disaster or could it work? It is his second marriage and her first.
Click to expand...
it may just work.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#122
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,317
113
#122
Ruby123 said:
Dear Dr Des,

This is a true story. I know a couple who just met exactly a month ago and have decided to get engaged. Am I the only one who thinks this is crazy? Apparently they feel that it was divinely orchestrated. The way they met, the astounding number of things they have in common, the number of boxes each tick, the comfortableness they feel with each other, the way they fit into each others family etc etc. Is this a recipe for disaster or could it work? It is his second marriage and her first.
Click to expand...
Sounds like recipe for disaster to me. I would explain, but it would take too long... but I could be wrong too.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#123
Aug 13, 2014
27,726
9,657
113
#123
oyster67 said:
I am from USA. Sounds a little bit like Baseball. You know a lot more about Cricket than I know about Baseball:). Sounds like it would be fascinating to watch! Have you ever played Cricket?
Click to expand...
Quote from Raphael:

"Cricket? NOBODY understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is before you can understand cricket."
 
R

Ruby123

Guest
#124
#124
zeroturbulence said:
Sounds like recipe for disaster to me. I would explain, but it would take too long... but I could be wrong too.
Click to expand...
I agree, Both parties are usually on their best behavior so early on in the piece so they really don't know the "real person" just yet. Perhaps they will get a shock. I have heard so many people say that their partner has changed and they weren't like that in the beginning. Well they have changed because what they were in the beginning was not the real them. Now they feel comfortable enough to be the real them or they feel the other is too emotionally invested to just walk away from them.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#125
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,317
113
#125
Ruby123 said:
I agree, Both parties are usually on their best behavior so early on in the piece so they really don't know the "real person" just yet. Perhaps they will get a shock. I have heard so many people say that their partner has changed and they weren't like that in the beginning. Well they have changed because what they were in the beginning was not the real them. Now they feel comfortable enough to be the real them or they feel the other is too emotionally invested to just walk away from them.
Click to expand...
Yea one month is too soon to know what a person's really like.
 
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#126
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#126
Oh man this is a serious question. Well, assuming they have gone through the traditional steps of answering the troll's riddles before crossing the bridge, summoning the invisible swordsman, and wiring the dowery to my bank account in Monaco...

Honestly, I've heard of these things working out more often than the traditional months of courtship. Speaking anecdotally.

I'd just be happy for them, I guess. Somewhat jealous too.

But there is a lot not being said here. I've never seen them together. Maybe they give off weird, forced vibes.

Ruby123 said:
Dear Dr Des,

This is a true story. I know a couple who just met exactly a month ago and have decided to get engaged. Am I the only one who thinks this is crazy? Apparently they feel that it was divinely orchestrated. The way they met, the astounding number of things they have in common, the number of boxes each tick, the comfortableness they feel with each other, the way they fit into each others family etc etc. Is this a recipe for disaster or could it work? It is his second marriage and her first.
Click to expand...
 
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#128
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#128
zeroturbulence said:
Sounds like recipe for disaster to me. I would explain, but it would take too long... but I could be wrong too.
Click to expand...
I won't totally disagree here. I dated a girl for four years who became an atheist two years in. She totally changed.

But yeah, we these things you always have to hedge. Most Christians stay Christians. Sometimes a month is enough. Sometimes it isn't. Relationships are great things and great things are never exact.
 
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#129
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#129
But seriously, answer the troll's riddles before crossing the bridge. If you attempt to cross the bridge, he'll either club you to death or get the troll shaman to curse you.
 
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#130
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#130
Missed this one.


Step 1: Buy yourself a strong fishing rod. One that can take a swordfish.

Step 2: Hook the book Masculine Christianity by Zachary Garris on the other end.

Step 3: Travel to the closest Christian college campus and perch yourself on a high wall.

Step 4: If she grabs it, reel her in.


Now you do have some wiggle room here. If you don't have a local Christian college, a megachurch letting out should do. Just make sure you have enough pocket change for a trip to Golden Corral.

Masculine Christianity is probably the best option, but there are others out there. Classical philosophy from Aristotle to Seneca will net you a wise lady. How Should We Then Live by Francis Schaeffer has also had some good results.

Just avoid Joel Osteen, romance novels, self-help tripe, and White Fragility.



Eph519 said:
How does one find a lovely lady who loves God? A real proverbs 31 woman.
Click to expand...
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#131
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,317
113
#131
Desdichado said:
But seriously, answer the troll's riddles before crossing the bridge. If you attempt to cross the bridge, he'll either club you to death or get the troll shaman to curse you.
Click to expand...
What are these questions/riddles, oh great Doctor? :)
 
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#132
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#132
Oh depends. Trolls are like people. Their IQ is on a curve. Stupid trolls (usually Stone Trolls) will go with classics like "What's black, white and red all over?"

More intelligent trolls (usually Water Trolls) tend to craft personalized riddles that only the couple can solve. This is what makes it an important rite of passage.


zeroturbulence said:
What are these questions/riddles, oh great Doctor? :)
Click to expand...
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#133
May 23, 2009
16,707
5,617
113
#133
Desdichado said:
My first question comes from "Lonely in Long Island"

He wants to know how he can find this girl. It can be done in five easy steps:



Step 1: Locate the seeing stone.

Step 2: Kill the evil wizard guarding the seeing stone.

Step 3: Ask the seeing stone for the location of the girl.

Step 4: Confirm location.

Step 5: Thow a cloth over the seeing stone before the Dark Lord sees what you're up to.
Click to expand...
Desdichado said:
Missed this one.


Step 1: Buy yourself a strong fishing rod. One that can take a swordfish.

Step 2: Hook the book Masculine Christianity by Zachary Garris on the other end.

Step 3: Travel to the closest Christian college campus and perch yourself on a high wall.

Step 4: If she grabs it, reel her in.


Now you do have some wiggle room here. If you don't have a local Christian college, a megachurch letting out should do. Just make sure you have enough pocket change for a trip to Golden Corral.

Masculine Christianity is probably the best option, but there are others out there. Classical philosophy from Aristotle to Seneca will net you a wise lady. How Should We Then Live by Francis Schaeffer has also had some good results.

Just avoid Joel Osteen, romance novels, self-help tripe, and White Fragility.
Click to expand...
Dang nab it, Desdi!!!

I just posted my thread without seeing these extra steps!!!

https://christianchat.com/christian...r-true-love-via-desdis-5-simple-steps.196886/

Well, if nothing else, this may or may not set it up for a sequel. :censored::cautious::p
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#134
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,317
113
#134
Desdichado said:
Oh depends. Trolls are like people. Their IQ is on a curve. Stupid trolls (usually Stone Trolls) will go with classics like "What's black, white and red all over?"

More intelligent trolls (usually Water Trolls) tend to craft personalized riddles that only the couple can solve. This is what makes it an important rite of passage.
Click to expand...
Oh I thought you meant actual questions like do you mind if I snore a lot lol.

 
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#135
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#135
Desdichado

Desdichado

Senior Member
#136
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
839
113
#136
I prefer to keep all my business here. Otherwise, people will miss gems like that one.
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#137
May 23, 2009
16,707
5,617
113
#137
Desdichado said:
Spin-off threads?!

I'm not ready for this kind of fame, Seoul!
Click to expand...
I figure everybody else is doing it, why not here as well??!!!

Besides.

Just wait about 5 months, and someone is bound to do a reboot/remake anyways.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#138
Aug 13, 2014
27,726
9,657
113
#138
5 months? I thought it was 11... They must be accelerating faster than I thought.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.