For the Men: Would You Choose Single Fatherhood Over Abortion if Given the Choice?

[Eli1]

@seoulsearch i don’t comment on abortion since I consider a very personal topic for whoever has to go through it but I did read your personal testimony.
I hope you are at peace with your situation and may God always bless you and protect you and guide you.

 

[seoulsearch]

@seoulsearch i don’t comment on abortion since I consider a very personal topic for whoever has to go through it but I did read your personal testimony.
I hope you are at peace with your situation and may God always bless you and protect you and guide you.

Thank you so much for you time and your compassion. 🌹💕

 

[Lynx]

A woman has a right to choose.

There are two outcomes when a mother gives birth,

Option [1] She willingly wanted this child, and she will love it and care for it.
Option [2] She was forced to have this child because our government forces her to.

In Option [2] she did not want this child and resents our government forcing her to have it. This resentment is passed on to the child. The child grows up with a mother that hates this child. She focuses all her anger at the child and this child grows up unwanted.

Which child has a better chance of growing up wilt compassion and love in their heart; [1] or [2] - ?

-

Hmm... Interesting post history you have there. You seem to be seeking threads about abortion so you can post the same thing in all of them.

 

[Lynx]

A woman has a right to choose.

There are two outcomes when a mother gives birth,

Option [1] She willingly wanted this child, and she will love it and care for it.
Option [2] She was forced to have this child because our government forces her to.

In Option [2] she did not want this child and resents our government forcing her to have it. This resentment is passed on to the child. The child grows up with a mother that hates this child. She focuses all her anger at the child and this child grows up unwanted.

Which child has a better chance of growing up wilt compassion and love in their heart; [1] or [2] - ?

-

Also, that list of options is VERY narrow. You have never seen any other outcome except these two?

I mean... I'm a rube in a small town in southwest Tennessee. Nothing ever happens here. But even I have seen many different outcomes in this scenario.

Surely you have seen other results than the ones you listed. You MUST live in a less backwoods place than where I live. There is nowhere to go from southwest Tennessee except more metro.

 

[Lanolin]

please tell me why you chose what you chose
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weird, its now the GOVERNMENT who forces a mother to have children?

um..No. The only thing a government does in my country is offer to look after the child if the mother cannot. They become wards of the state and get fostered or adopted out.

If the mother does not do this (her choice) she can still look after the child herself although she may need to apply for benefits, but she can also NOT do this, neglect her child, abandon it or treat it badly. However nobody can FORCE her to look after a child if she doesnt want to.

and this applies whether a mother is married or unmarried, whether the dad is present or absent.

Option 3 also seems totally ommited...God intervenes, changes peoples hearts and protects the child. This is a christian forum - you think believers dont have this option?

 

[Lanolin]

You can also be FORCED to have an abortion, in fact, many women undergo this trauma.

 

[Lily-Keith]

You are certainly not alone in your opinion.

I am adopted by parents who are not even my own race. All my life, people have asked me, "But what about your 'real' parents?"

I have real parents, and they are the parents I'm talking about that I proudly claim now.

My birth parents, for whatever reason, made the decision to abandon their me as their child. I don't know their circumstances and have learned over the years to try not to hold it against them, as God tells us to let go and forgive.

I have heard many, many people say that they could never raise a child who was "not their own," that adoption is "unnatural," and that the only true children that count are biological ones.

I understand this.

But every now and then, God does a miracle. (After all, Moses was also adopted, and Jesus was adopted by Joseph.)

I told God once, if my birth mother and father ever came looking for me, I would have to call them some kind of respectful title from their own language and culture, but I could never call them "Mom and Dad."

The ironic thing to me is that I could never see my biological parents as my "Mom and Dad," because my REAL parents were a young white couple who started out in a $5000 trailer who cried out to God for a child.

And as far as I'm concerned, they are the only "Mom and Dad" that I have.

BUT, I do understand that people think differently and that biological ties are very important to most people.

It's just that I don't have them and never will, and yet I know I couldn't love these two people any more than I do, even if we had the same genes.

Hey cool! I was adopted as well. I also can never see my bio parents as my 'real parents'. I believe a real family is built on God's love and providence, whether or not you're blood related.

 

[Lanolin]

most young women get abortions because nobody actually ever told them how babies were made and what sex is, or what contraception does (and how it works)

Hands up who never had any sex education and had to find out the hard way?

 

[HealthAndHappiness]

Let's see.......
Hmmm......
Raising a gift from the Lord.....
Or murder?


I've prayed for a good woman and my own child/children that I hope to be blessed with from that marriage some day. I'll let NObody kill my children. I've trained men, women and children how to defend life.
Why would a sane man kill his own?

My favorite TV show growing up were old reruns about a widower who raised his boy by himself after his wife died. I liked it because I could identify with the main character Chuck Connors played. Most of the episodes had a good moral to the story. Many of them were Biblical lessons that he taught his boy.

 

[Treeboy]

Children of single parents should automatically b given to the father unless he is a serious abuser or can't b found. Single mothers have done a terrible job over the last 70 years there is no statistic that does not sway heavily against them. They can't pay their bills and need billions from state and local govts. This will also give them time to chase their careers I hear about endlessly. In America they are getting 150bil per year in child support.

They had all the time and opportunity to prove themsleves and failed. Raising the majority of our moralless criminals. They are destroying society as long as they get there kids by default and cash prizes we will b in a societal decline.

 

[Lanolin]

I heard in the US, fundamentalist mormons milk child support off the govt. They dont declare who the father is and pretend to be single mothers..the dad can practice polygamy that way.

Apparently one 'dad' had 45 children from different mothers. Crazy

but then all their children get raised in a cult...so..?!

 

[Lynx]

Children of single parents should automatically b given to the father unless he is a serious abuser or can't b found. Single mothers have done a terrible job over the last 70 years there is no statistic that does not sway heavily against them. They can't pay their bills and need billions from state and local govts. This will also give them time to chase their careers I hear about endlessly. In America they are getting 150bil per year in child support.

They had all the time and opportunity to prove themsleves and failed. Raising the majority of our moralless criminals. They are destroying society as long as they get there kids by default and cash prizes we will b in a societal decline.

Standard anti-woman stuff.

Howdy Treeboy. Good to see some things never change.

Ah well. At least we know you're still alive and well.

 

[stilllearning]

A woman has a right to choose.

There are two outcomes when a mother gives birth,

Option [1] She willingly wanted this child, and she will love it and care for it.
Option [2] She was forced to have this child because our government forces her to.

In Option [2] she did not want this child and resents our government forcing her to have it. This resentment is passed on to the child. The child grows up with a mother that hates this child. She focuses all her anger at the child and this child grows up unwanted.

Which child has a better chance of growing up wilt compassion and love in their heart; [1] or [2] - ?

-

You are adding to the problem you profess to be against. Prior to abortion a woman had to be picky had to chose the right man for her. As the consequence was a child with someone who may not love her or be there for her. So your solution is to make personal responsibility void. When you make it so there is no cost or consequence for sin then sin abounds.

Abortion has made it easy for two people who have no love or emotions for each other to just engage the lust of their flesh for momentarily satisfaction. Then your solution is hey just kill the life they made as lust trumps life and there should be no responsibility for ones actions.

When there is responsibility for ones actions there is at least some second thought should I do this as there is a price to pay. So your solution to unwanted being born is to keep in place what has exponential added to unwanted being born. I have never found what is helping create the problem by keeping it in place to solve the problem.

 

[seoulsearch]

Hey cool! I was adopted as well. I also can never see my bio parents as my 'real parents'. I believe a real family is built on God's love and providence, whether or not you're blood related.

Hi Lily!

Thanks so much for sharing this. 🌹

It's always great to meet another fellow adoptee.

Many blessings to you and your God-given family! 🥰

 

[Lily-Keith]

Hi Lily!

Thanks so much for sharing this. 🌹

It's always great to meet another fellow adoptee.

Many blessings to you and your God-given family! 🥰

Same to you!
Thank you so much!
Hope you have a blessed weekend

 

[Krumbeard]

Hey Everyone,

Someone brought up an important point in the "Why Are Women Expected to be the Gatekeepers of Virginity?" thread.

This poster pointed out that many women are choosing to commit the sin of abortion after fornication, creating, as the poster said, "about as bad a combo as you can get."

For whatever reason, I have known a few women (through work settings) who have had abortions and have heard their reasons for doing so, and have seen the sorrow for doing so. As an adopted child myself, I listen to them because I always wonder if many years ago, my own birth mother might have considered doing the same thing while carrying me.

I am curious as to how the men here on CC feel about this issue.

* If you were in a situation in which the woman you were involved with became pregnant (whether married or single, as married people get abortions, too,) and for whatever reason, she did not want to carry the baby to term, would you fight for the right to have that baby born, then take the child and raise him or her completely by yourself? Why or why not

* Would you just step back and allow the mother to make the decision? Why or why not?

* If you were granted custody of the child, would you grant the mother partial custody or visitation rights? Why or why not?

* Would you take the mother to court for her part of the financial support of the child?

I have known one man whose girlfriend aborted their child without telling him, and another man who took the mother of his child to court for visitation rights because she didn't want anything to do with him (he also pays for his child's financial needs voluntarily), so I've had a glimpse into how these things have affected the men involved very deeply.

I fully support a father's right and decision to save the life of his child, but am wondering how men feel about taking on the task of becoming a single father.

What would you choose to do in that situation?

All are welcome to post -- although this is a question specifically for the men, the ladies are most welcome to answer with their observations and viewpoints, too.

Because this is a very sensitive subject, I'm going to also post a poll as a way of allowing those who might not want to answer publicly to still have a voice in this conversation. It will be anonymous and multiple choice in case you identify with more than one answer.

HOWEVER, please do not let the poll be a substitution for a discussion. If you are willing, please share your reasons as to why you chose the answer(s) you did here. It will be impossible for me to include every answer someone might give (and the polling function only allows a certain number of answers anyway), so if you don't see your answer in the poll, please be sure to post it here as well.

I'm looking forward to seeing the discussion this will bring about.

Well, I hope it never comes to that, but I can now say the answer is simple. I would raise the child.

Now back up 20ish years...the answer is still just as simple but I honestly don't know what I would have done. Hopefully the same.