Do you believe in a soulmate? POLL

[Sonflower]

Soulmates are a myth, in my opinion. I believe God gives us guidelines for spouses, like being equally yoked, but there is a lot of freedom to choose who we want to spend our lives with. I agree with the statement that God has the best plan in mind and sometimes we choose different but the term "soulmate" indicates that if you don't choose that one perfect person your marriage won't be as good or fulfilling as it could have been. I disagree with that wholeheartedly. With God at the center of any relationship and some work you can have an extremely fulfilling marriage. People have this idea that "if I find my soulmate everything will work out" and I think that makes us lazy about a marriage relationship. If you're not proactive in a marriage relationship it will fall apart. It takes work.

 

[Solemateleft]

Soulmates are a myth, in my opinion. I believe God gives us guidelines for spouses, like being equally yoked, but there is a lot of freedom to choose who we want to spend our lives with. I agree with the statement that God has the best plan in mind and sometimes we choose different but the term "soulmate" indicates that if you don't choose that one perfect person your marriage won't be as good or fulfilling as it could have been. I disagree with that wholeheartedly. With God at the center of any relationship and some work you can have an extremely fulfilling marriage. People have this idea that "if I find my soulmate everything will work out" and I think that makes us lazy about a marriage relationship. If you're not proactive in a marriage relationship it will fall apart. It takes work.

Wolves, Swans, Beavers and Bald Eagles...

I completely agree with all your rationalization regarding it takes work to make a marriage work...
IMHO, I believe that when two people have both decided to love each other unconditionally and decide to never give up on 'working together' to strive to be there for each other and to make each other happy; till death do us part... In my book (definition) these are as realistic a soulmate as humanly possible.
I completely agree with the flawed logic of there only being one; that would be fantastically and mathematically unrealistic.
I believe that we are intended to grow where we are planted (yes, we have abundant choices) just as an egg is concieved in a womb...
Humans can take a page from the monogamous species that our Lord has created: Wolves, Swans, Beavers and Bald Eagles, for example...
They don't over think their quest to find their life long partner and grow a family where they are planted. They don't contemplate the notion of only one (from a distant land), they work to make it work with the one they chose...
IMHO, their life long unconditional commitment to the one they chose, inherently makes them soulmates (analogy); assuming in the case of humans we are also seeking a faith based relationship mutually supportive of each other along our journey towards salvation...

 

[Sonflower]

IMHO, their life long unconditional commitment to the one they chose, inherently makes them soulmates (analogy); assuming in the case of humans we are also seeking a faith based relationship mutually supportive of each other along our journey towards salvation...

I agree with everything you said but wanted to specifically point out this. I do 100% agree, whoever you choose - once you make the covenant before God with that person - they become your soulmate.

 

[tourist]

I used to believe there was no such thing. Now I do. It took me fourty six years to find it.

Better late than never. I pray that the visit with your man goes well and very enjoyable and joyous.

 

[tourist]

Soulmates are a myth, in my opinion. I believe God gives us guidelines for spouses, like being equally yoked, but there is a lot of freedom to choose who we want to spend our lives with. I agree with the statement that God has the best plan in mind and sometimes we choose different but the term "soulmate" indicates that if you don't choose that one perfect person your marriage won't be as good or fulfilling as it could have been. I disagree with that wholeheartedly. With God at the center of any relationship and some work you can have an extremely fulfilling marriage. People have this idea that "if I find my soulmate everything will work out" and I think that makes us lazy about a marriage relationship. If you're not proactive in a marriage relationship it will fall apart. It takes work.

I believe exactly like you believe regarding soul mates. I do believe that God can search and find a suitable spouse that you can be very pleased with but the marriage itself takes a lot of work and prayer.

 

[Deade]

I believe exactly like you believe regarding soul mates. I do believe that God can search and find a suitable spouse that you can be very pleased with but the marriage itself takes a lot of work and prayer.

I agree, a relationship is what you make it. I have had two fairly long marriages and I messed both them up. I have learned a lot from those. First, you have to shelve your ego. A relationship is about compromise. But not for only one partner: there has to be a middle ground that you can achieve. If we are compassionate and willing to change, we will make it work. You both will have to give a little.

That said, love is what really conquers our hearts. Wives have a hard time submitting to a man that she is doubtful he has her best interest at heart. That is because the man hasn't learned love properly. The kind of love that you would lay down your life before you would harm. When you love like that their hopes and dreams matter to you, before you own even. The closest we come is parent-child love. I mean the kind of love where the parent is active with the child from birth. It really gripes me to see a man too manly to change-feed-bath a baby. They are giving up a bond that will last a lifetime.

What I have learned that I did wrong in both my marriages, was not resolving an issue when it came up. I knew it is what destroyed my first marriage. But I found myself doing it again, even when I knew better. Once enough time has gone by you can't get back to where you were. That is why we are not to let the sun set on our anger. We are creatures of habit, and those habits will destroy us. God help us.

 

[p_rehbein]

.........sigh,,,,,,,,soulmates going down in flames..........

we b losing in da Poll

what's next?

Jiff Peanut Butter goes extinct?

 

[zeroturbulence]

Cant believe this threads only a week old. Feels more like a month to me.

 

[tourist]

I agree, a relationship is what you make it. I have had two fairly long marriages and I messed both them up. I have learned a lot from those. First, you have to shelve your ego. A relationship is about compromise. But not for only one partner: there has to be a middle ground that you can achieve. If we are compassionate and willing to change, we will make it work. You both will have to give a little.

That said, love is what really conquers our hearts. Wives have a hard time submitting to a man that she is doubtful he has her best interest at heart. That is because the man hasn't learned love properly. The kind of love that you would lay down your life before you would harm. When you love like that their hopes and dreams matter to you, before you own even. The closest we come is parent-child love. I mean the kind of love where the parent is active with the child from birth. It really gripes me to see a man too manly to change-feed-bath a baby. They are giving up a bond that will last a lifetime.

What I have learned that I did wrong in both my marriages, was not resolving an issue when it came up. I knew it is what destroyed my first marriage. But I found myself doing it again, even when I knew better. Once enough time has gone by you can't get back to where you were. That is why we are not to let the sun set on our anger. We are creatures of habit, and those habits will destroy us. God help us.

My first marriage at the age of 23 that lasted for 6 1/2 years was a total disaster but I learned a lot on how to be a good husband despite having a lazy cheating abusive spouse.

Your estimation of submitting is right on target and merits serious consideration by those men that are contemplating marriage. You really have to put your wife's best interests above your own. I did the bottle feeding and diaper changing thing too. It really is an excellent way to bond with the little baby.

What I learned later on from scripture is to not let the sun set on your anger as you learned yourself. Actually the bible is chock full of stuff to help a man become a better husband and father. After that, I learned to try to avoid anger altogether towards a spouse. It is best to not sweat the small stuff and to be patient and understanding for that which is more important.

I enjoyed your post very much and found it to be a very refreshing perspective.

 

[Leftheri]

I truly believe that soul mates exists. I've had over 40 of them... and the proof is in the pudding.

 

[Rechazado]

I guess they should exist, however i haven't found one. As i see this earth with a moon around, as i'm told planets have moons turning around, i May infer there is a sunny person we could cling to specially; however, i haven't found a single orbit i called "mine" and I belong another place.

 

[toinena]

Better late than never. I pray that the visit with your man goes well and very enjoyable and joyous.

It is going very well. Very well indeed.

 

[Rechazado]

I've seen people discuss the concept of "soul mates" many times on the forum over the years, and I think that when I was younger, I used to believe in them.

However, something that someone posted a long time ago really made me rethink my stance: if God does makes one, just one, ultimate soulmate for you--what happens if, let's say, they make a wrong choice in their life (like drinking or texting while driving), and they are killed before you even have a chance to meet them?

Are you then doomed to spend the rest of your life alone, because that "one ultimate soulmate" God had for you is no longer living?

These kinds of questions make me lean towards more of a believe in workable compatibility rather than supposedly one true soul mate.

The older I get, the more I also think about how our culture defines marriage and a supposed soulmate rather as opposed to what God intended it to be. In today's world, a "soul mate" or even "marriage partner" means someone who makes us feel on top of the world 24/7, and if that feeling somehow ends, most people will move on.

But yet, God commanded His prophet, Hosea, to marry Gomer, a woman who was already known to be promiscuous, and ran to other men while she was married to Hosea--to the point where he would even have to go after her and retrieve her from these other men.

Did God specifically make Gomer to be Hosea's "soulmate"? If so, I'm pretty sure this is a soulmate that no one would want.

Whether or not God does make "soulmates", the purpose of marriage is still the same--to carry out God's will in our lives. In the case of Hosea and Gomer, His will was to give the people a real-live illustration of how God kept taking Israel back every time she ran to other gods.

And this, to be honest, sometimes makes me afraid to ask God what He truly wants my life to be.

Few years back, i met "my" Gomer. I accepted all she said, her 3 children, the challenge she set on me to keep it up, but she remained seeking "her" soulmate and obviously i wasn't enough as i also thought previous women weren't what i look after... Our hearts are deseiving!

 

[tourist]

It is going very well. Very well indeed.

I am very happy to hear this and is an answered prayer.

 

[CharliRenee]

I posted this in another thread, lol, that had nothing to do with this. I thought I was posting it here...

Let me try again, lol...

I want to say again that while it would be such a beautiful outcome to find a man of God who wanted a woman of God, to be able to know and experience that kind of love on earth would be divine to say the least, oh how sweet and rewarding that must be, but I know regardless when it comes to Happily ever after, my only true soulmate is He...

"For your husband is your Maker, Whose name is the Lord of hosts; And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, Who is called the God of all the earth.
Isaiah 54:5 NASB

 

[SimpleGardner]

moot

 

[Rasputin_OZ]

marrying your soulmate does not mean it will be perfect marriage, that is just the beginning.

I believe God does make our mates, and he ensures we meet them, that is how amazing he is.

yes we have choices, yes we make mistakes, the world interferes see Jacobs marriage to Rachal and Leah.

But as most above said, marriage is work, laying down our lives one for each other.

Read song of Solomon for how to speak of your spouse, loving words and building them up

 

[SimpleGardner]

In so many ways the notion of "LOVE" between a couple has become founded in "fairy tale" thinking. How "that person" will make me happy! For just a moment try to imagine the world 150 years ago and back thousands of years. The one consist theme was survival. Everyone pulled their weight or they did not survive. A man and woman did not have government programs to support them. They didn't have large corporations to employ them. They didn't have grocery stores to obtain food from. No they had the land their hands and each other as well as their offspring to establish a pattern of living that made life tolerable. When they looked at their mates they saw the other half of that "pattern of life" that sustained them. Their appreciation ran far deeper that a cute text or a dinner out. Many of the notions of love today are challenging because the patterns of life today require little dependence on one another which is one of the key constituents of a "relationship".

So, if you are looking for a "true mate", look for a "true life", one according the pattern given by our Creator!

 

[1christian1]

I believe so. God knows the special person for each one of us that will be suitable and just perfect for us. Of course, there are those who are devoted to being single and they don't necessarily have the desire to marry. Anyway, just saying. I'm not sure about everyone though.

God has set out our lives in motion, so wouldn't he already ordain that soulmate you're going to spend the rest of your life with?

I think I had that a couple of times and did'nt appreciate it or see it or see it for what it was...

 

[TamLynn]

I think I had that a couple of times and did'nt appreciate it or see it or see it for what it was...

With that reflection in mind, perhaps you'll know the next time. 💜