You would have to convince me that Timothy, who definitely was a pastor, was in fact married. And worse, you would have to convince me that the Apostle John (who was also an elder and pastor) was married! There is no reason to believe so in either case.
Also.....what of widowers? Should the wife die, is he immediately disqualified?
Furthermore, the requirement regarding marriage is as follows:
Tit 1:6
If any be blameless, the husband of
one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly.
1Ti 3:2
A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of
one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach;
1Ti 3:12
Let the deacons be the husbands of
one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.
Polygamy was the issue at hand. Not the fact of being married itself.
2Jo 1:1
This letter is from John, the elder (
presbyteros ).
I am writing to the chosen lady and to her children, whom I love in the truth—as does everyone else who knows the truth—
3Jo 1:1
This letter is from John, the elder (
presbyteros ).
I am writing to Gaius, my dear friend, whom I love in the truth.