Well the time to have done that was in 2014 when Russia annexed Crimea. After that why did Ukraine not work with Finland, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, and Poland (all on the western border of Russia) and make a defense alliance for themselves?
It is now too late to show Russia anything. And here is the reason why NATO will fail to stop Russia militarily: China will step right into the conflict. since China has a mutual agreement with Russia.
"China and Russia currently enjoy the best relations they have had since the late 1950s. Although they have no formal alliance, the two countries do have an informal agreement to coordinate diplomatic and economic moves, and build up an alliance against the United States."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/China–Russia_relations
But they have also said that there are no limits to their alliance.
At the same time China did present a comprehensive peace proposal for Ukraine.
https://www.fmprc.gov.cn/mfa_eng/zxxx_662805/202302/t20230224_11030713.html
Within that proposal, here is what they said: "
Resuming peace talks. Dialogue and negotiation are the only viable solution to the Ukraine crisis. All efforts conducive to the peaceful settlement of the crisis must be encouraged and supported. The international community should stay committed to the right approach of promoting talks for peace, help parties to the conflict open the door to a political settlement as soon as possible, and create conditions and platforms for the resumption of negotiation. China will continue to play a constructive role in this regard."
So how did NATO respond?
"The proposals however cut little ice with NATO.
"China doesn't have much credibility because they have not been able to condemn the illegal invasion of Ukraine," NATO Secretary-General Jens Stoltenberg told reporters in Tallinn." But neither does NATO, since NATO did not condemn the illegal invasions of Iraq and Afghanistan by the USA.
At the very least, the NATO Secretary General should have met with Xi Jinping to determine exactly what could be negotiated on both sides. But no. Biden, Blinken, NATO, etc simply dismissed this peace plan because it did not originate with them. Now NATO wants to talk about nuclear conflict, and that is really irresponsible.