This is going to get a little off topic so forgive me but I thought I should provide some context. I personally didn’t agree with what “old Sage” said on that particular comment but I chose to disregard it. To be fair Old Sage didn’t know the full story either.
My wife’s BP situation is that during pregnancy with our son she was diagnosed with high BP. The doctor gave prescription on it essentially for during the pregnancy to make sure she remained at a safe level. We’re going on 5 years now after the birth and she’s still on it. She switched doctors but chose to keep the old prescription. She in passing conversation told me that her doctors visit went well. The doctors told her she could get off the medication if she wanted. She has chosen to continue. She is scared as soon as she gets off these meds it’s going to kill her. Absolutely convinced of it. I urged her to take the doctors suggestion and get off them for a while just to see where your BP is naturally at and if needed we can restart the medication again… didn’t go over to well. She got way emotional claimed immediately that I was being unloving and evidently wanted her to die. Cause evidently that’s what she had convinced herself is going to happen the day she stops taking them…. It was not one of our shining examples of how we should talk to each other at all. That is the context of that situation which I was using as an example of the emotional roller coaster my wife sends us on with any and I mean any serious adult conversation and it happened again when I confronted her about not going to this.
Thanks for the background information. But it is still her choice to make, with her doctor. If the doctor thinks she should go off, that is a different story than what our banned friend said, which was about him not wanting to kiss or touch her for fear he would get the med inside himself. Totally controlling and selfish.
However, your point that she is not going to die, is important to know. Have you ever had heart disease or high blood pressure? I have, and it was one of the most anxiety producing situations I have ever been in. I was also terrified I would drop dead at any moment from another heart & vascular issue. I could have died hundreds of times from pneumonia. RA threatens my health, and a close friend died in Feb of Rhuematoid Lung Disease, which I also have.
But heart is so much scarier. I was put on meds immediately, after my heart incident, and the symptoms mostly subsided. But for over a solid month, I lived in terror, with horrible anxiety. I really had to take it to God. In the end, I was comforted by the knowledge that God is sovereign & in control. God knows when it is time for me to die, so trusting him is vital. In addition, the heart meds helped me tremendously, so I relaxed and went back to enjoying my life, including doing heart rehab.
Your wife sounds like she needs counselling or behaviour management. If she goes off the BP meds, and her BP goes up, she can just return to taking them. It is also important for her to realize if she goes off her meds, it is unlikely she will drop dead today. That is magical thinking. The pills are not magically keeping her alive.
The Bible tells us to be anxious for nothing. (Phil 4:6-7) Those are very wise words. We do need to take precautions, of course. If we have a life threatening condition, we should follow our doctor's orders, exercise, stay out of the sun, or observe COVID protocols, for example, and take the prescribed medications. Heart specialists are good to negotiate with. When the first statin really bothered me, my cardiologist let me try 3 others. Then she declared I was statin intolerant, and I haven't been in them since 2019.
Your wife sounds very immature as a Christian. Does she read her Bible, pray & go to a Bible believing church? If not, you have found the source of your marital issues. If you don't either, time for you to be the man, and an example. Plus, regardless of the marriage, you will personally grow into a mature Christian. You just can't will yourself into maturity. Instead, God has given us some easy disciplines to follow. By being consistent, the Holy Spirit has really transformed me. I'm not perfect, of course! But so radically changed from when God first saved me!!
That's what you need to work on. As for your wife, she has low self esteem, thinking you, who love her, wants to kill her. Plus some paranoia. She may have intrusive thoughts, and might need need some psych meds till she can get in control of these inner demons.
"Heavenly Father, I pray for our brother and his marriage issues. Open up some doors that would help them listen & communicate more. Encourage them to pray, read the whole Bible through, yearly, study the Word of God. Transform them by the renewing of their minds (Rms 12:2) please touch his wife, & give her a special touch to wipe away her fears, anxieties & worries. Give her the peace that passes understanding! In Jesus name I pray, Amen!"
Try memorizing this passage, and make it part of who you are. Maybe one day, your wife will
See there is a way out of the darkness!
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Phil 4:6-7
1
1
