What can you offer?

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This beautiful tumbleweed...

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maxwel said:
The False Dilemma is clearly asserted in the second paragraph of the Opening Post



False Dilemma in Opening Post:

1. Method A: A christian can be unassertive, and wait for God to bring a girl to drop in his lap.
"I don't believe God brings anyone a spouse."

2. Method B: A Christian can be assertive, and go out and get a spouse without any help from God.
"I believe we have to go on our own to meet someone"



If there is any questions that I'm misunderstanding Tommy, and this isn't what he meant... we can look at other posts in this thread, or in other threads, and find his point of view on this issue is exactly as I state it.

Again, my point is not to accuse Tommy of any bad intentions.
You can make an assertion and have perfectly good intentions.
My point is simply to show that this IS a false dilemma, and we should be taking a more balanced and biblical approach.



Lynx,
Are you genuinely accusing me of all kinds of bad intentions because I'm suggesting we put God back into our search for a spouse?
I'm suggesting we put God back into our search for a spouse... and... you're upset with me in some way?
Seriously?
I would expect you to be in complete agreement.

The things I'm talking about were asserted right in the opening post... and you're accusing me of bad intentions for mentioning them.
I don't think I've accused you, or Tommy, or anyone else of any bad intentions... but you feel fine to accuse me of bad intentions.

Very odd.

I suppose if I'd gone off topic by talking about bratwurst, like everyone else, that would be fine.
But if I carefully examine the actual words in the OP, and talk about something which is both IN THE OPENING POST, and also MEANINGFUL... then I'm a bad guy?

Very odd.

Maybe you've had a bad day.
Maybe you've had several bad days.
Maybe I remind you of someone else that had a bad day.
Maybe you just misunderstood my intentions.
Maybe I said things in some particular way that just sounded offensive to you.
Maybe you just discriminate against the whole cyclops race.
I have no idea.

How about we all take a deep breath and relax.

If I've offended you in some personal way, then I apologize.

But disagreeing with Tommy doesn't happen to be a sin,
and I can disagree with someone and still like the person just fine.

I think we all need to relax.
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Good Day Maxwel, I'm in complete agreement with you.

When I read the following statement:
Tommy379 said:
I don't believe God brings anyone a spouse. I don't believe in soul mates. I believe we have to go on our own to meet someone, and make the decision to marry them.
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I had to clean my eyeglasses because I thought they were foggy and I wasn't seeing clearly. Especially since others were disagreeing with you.

But you are correct and you did not stray from the point. You only commented on what was previously said in the opening post.

So don't let anyone discourage you :)
 
Kim82 said:
Good Day Maxwel, I'm in complete agreement with you.

When I read the following statement: I had to clean my eyeglasses because I thought they were foggy and I wasn't seeing clearly. Especially since others were disagreeing with you.

But you are correct and you did not stray from the point. You only commented on what was previously said in the opening post.

So don't let anyone discourage you :)
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Can you cite one single instance in the past 2000 years, God took control of a persons mind, and made them love another person?
Can you cite a single time, a man prayed for a wife to be given to him, and the sky opened up, and a woman fell into his lap?
 
Tommy379 said:
Can you cite one single instance in the past 2000 years, God took control of a persons mind, and made them love another person?
Can you cite a single time, a man prayed for a wife to be given to him, and the sky opened up, and a woman fell into his lap?
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Tommy, please have yourself a wonderful day. I'm not going there with you.
 
Tommy379 said:
The threads, where we list what we will accept or not accept in a potential lover, is cute and fun; but I believe it could be more constructive, to see what you think you could offer a potential mate.

I don't believe God brings anyone a spouse. I don't believe in soul mates. I believe we have to go on our own to meet someone, and make the decision to marry them. I believe the time between meeting someone and marriage, is the time you date, and sell yourself to them......To give reasons why this person should choose you.

This could be fun, or it could be a difficult exercise that reveals how we value ourselves. Some members here might spot great things about you, that you never realized about yourself. They could also disagree with your assessment of yourself. Members here read what you write, they remember it, and analyze it. I know, because it's what I find myself doing.

I got this idea this morning, reading repies to another thread called: I wouldn't marry....
I used the thread just to lay down some jokes, I don't really think I answered the question. I don't think I can. I saw some people post entire list of either characteristics or vices, they wouldn't accept in a mate. That is fine to know what you want in someone, but I don't know that I could make demands for a particular kind of person. This led me to think, if I had high standards for a bride, what could I offer them in return?



I guess now I have to start this.




Besides being the world's sexiest man (Aaron Rodgers not included, he's dreamy) I can fix most things broken.

I can repair your car. Not just simple repairs, I spent several years as a mechanic, and I can tell you why your engine light is on. I can repair the reason it is on. I will keep up with your vehicles service, my darlin will not be broke down on the side of the road. Even my ex wife misses this about me.

I come with a large assortment of tools.

I will keep the house up. I can drive a #16 with two hits of my California framer. I can paint, lay tile, hang a door on the hinges, glaze window panes in, plumbing, most electrical, install appliances, and drywall.

I can cook meat, and I'm a grill master.

I can split firewood with an axe.

I'm somewhat literate.

I haven't piloted an aircraft in years, but if the pilot has a heart attack, we should be fine.

I grew up sailing.

I can do some gun smithing. I've built a few of my own weapons, and I'm damned good with them.

I'm sure this list is far from what all I can do for a woman, but it really is just gravy for the potatoes.

I don't lie. I'd like to, but I'm no good at it. My deception would be discovered before I could utter the words. I always lose at poker. If it's strip poker, I don't mind too much. Don't ask me if your clothes make you look fat, if you don't want the truth.
If I love you, I will love you. I won't leave or cheat. I will carry my end of the vows. On the macro level, I will be happy with you, although I can't make you happy, it's not really my job. It's your burden to be happy with me. If the grass is a bit dry and dying on my side, I assume it's the same on the other. I don't like dead grass, and will call chemlawn if I have to.
I will accept your advice and counsel, but I will lead you in worship of our Lord.
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Ok.this is my first day and first post here..i agree with you...or the first part of your post..seems the older people get and the more hurt theyve experienced the longer the list of "charactor traits" are demanded in finding someone...question is..here is GOD in all of this? If we see how couples were brought together in the Bible...they didnt have "lists"..they actually relied on God and based thier descisions on attributes that would make relationship last..something our society has lost sight of...sadly
 
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Waggles said:
(ASV) Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, And obtaineth favor of Jehovah.

(CEV) A man's greatest treasure is his wife-- she is a gift from the LORD.

(GNB) Find a wife and you find a good thing; it shows that the LORD is good to you.

Proverbs 18:22
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Yeah I firmly believe these scriptures, and my favourite love story is Abraham sends out his servantvto find a bride for Isaac. God was involved totally. What I don’t understand is I am still waiting on my Rebecca. Any thoughts?
 
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