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[NotMakingThisUp]

Hmm... I think I should put a clarification on that reply I made last night.

If some newbie had rolled up and said that, I would have said something like "Haha! It would probably be the other way around. I'd be making HER nervous."

If one of my friends, who knows me, said that, I would know they were joking and I would return the joke. Like if seoul said it, I'd threaten to give Winston away to a needy child.

But YOU... You seem to enjoy throwing shade, as the kids say. I keep getting the impression that you take an almost gleeful delight in finding ways to make people look bad. Of course I have never met you in person, so I don't know for sure. Probably better so. But that is the impression I keep getting.

It gets annoying. So last night my annoyance runneth over.

Chill, Lynx. Or at least consider it, especially when someone’s gone flamethrower at you.
Words mean things. Words are like numbers.
You put the numbers together, you get the answers,
You put the words together, you get the answers.
You put the wrong words together, you get the wrong answers.
You shared words with-whoever. Consider the possibility that when words you share falls on non-listening ears makes your words wasted. (wrong words, wrong answers).
Listening is different than hearing. Clearly, we’re all capable of flame-throwing back. Call it self defense, but the need for Fire-with-fire only makes for burnt involvement. Not warm relationship. Relationships are a function of choice. Not necessity.
To yourself, just say ‘thanks for sharing, whoever.‘
Then, get back in a place where true relationship lies ahead and is worth having. Be faithful(?).
Also, don’t ‘need’ yourself in responding at me. Okay choose responding and okay not to. Your choices; no one else’s ! -KF

 

[NotMakingThisUp]

I would say u r a 5 . Definitely not ugly but , nothing special looks wise . I hope u find happiness and , that u bring happiness to your other half .

I would say u r a 5 . Definitely not ugly but , nothing special looks wise . I hope u find happiness and , that u bring happiness to your other half .

Consider. If you want to be attractive, be interested. Claiming ’Not Photogenic’ makes you ‘interesting.‘
Circus clown car shows are interesting.
Picture-perfects are for picture-frames, so, stop framing yourself???-KF

 

[Lynx]

Chill, Lynx. Or at least consider it, especially when someone’s gone flamethrower at you.
Words mean things. Words are like numbers.
You put the numbers together, you get the answers,
You put the words together, you get the answers.
You put the wrong words together, you get the wrong answers.
You shared words with-whoever. Consider the possibility that when words you share falls on non-listening ears makes your words wasted. (wrong words, wrong answers).
Listening is different than hearing. Clearly, we’re all capable of flame-throwing back. Call it self defense, but the need for Fire-with-fire only makes for burnt involvement. Not warm relationship. Relationships are a function of choice. Not necessity.
To yourself, just say ‘thanks for sharing, whoever.‘
Then, get back in a place where true relationship lies ahead and is worth having. Be faithful(?).
Also, don’t ‘need’ yourself in responding at me. Okay choose responding and okay not to. Your choices; no one else’s ! -KF

First, howdy and welcome to the forum.

Second, although this is in general good advice, in this particular case it is not applicable.

 

[NotMakingThisUp]

First, howdy and welcome to the forum.

Second, although this is in general good advice, in this particular case it is not applicable.

First, howdy and welcome to the forum.

Second, although this is in general good advice, in this particular case it is not applicable.

Thanks for replying, Lynx; for being a generous listener! It’s important to me to know how I stand in communication with others.

 

[GaryA]

Hi Gary.... that's a lot for us to have to remember, just so we can interpret your tone . Do you think you could learn to use emojis more? They are more universally understood and there's quite a few to pick from . Hard to get mad at the face lol .

It is not something that you should have to remember; rather, it is something you should be able to pick up on - and understand - based on what you learned from English grammar and the way we use various forms of emphasis in different situations - including the internet.

What do we use italics for? What do we use bold for? What about other forms of emphasis? What do they mean?

What I am trying to do is to use what knowledge and understanding I have of these things to "fashion" my posts in a way that others can better understand as opposed to just reading "dry text" (no emphasis whatsoever) and trying to understand 'nuance' from that. (It is not perfect, but surely it is better than "dry text"...?)

I am not particularly predisposed to using 'hieroglyphic' language to communicate effectively - I was taught how to use words for that purpose - with various forms of 'emphasis' used to clarify the more subtle aspects of communication that are normally included in conversation where body language exists - but that are missing in situations like this.

It is a sad thing that society is being "dumbed-down" so much - it seems to be reverting back to hieroglyphics as a method of communications. (Is that not what 'smilies'/'emojis'/etc. really are - a 'picture-word' form of communication?)

Think about it. And, I mean - really think about it. What is happening? Where is it headed?

Why is cognitive/intelligent conversation shrinking and disappearing from every-day life?

And - by this I mean - a thought-provoking type of conversation among average common folk.

I can agree that smilies/emojis/etc. can be fun to use and get an idea across that we wish to convey.

But - does giving up on 'normal' communication skills in trade for learning the new language of 10,000 smiles/emojis really seem like a good idea?

What happened to reading words and using our minds to think about what we have read and determine the meaning through the words?

Generations of the past could remember a whole lot more - we even memorized telephone numbers - and, it was no great feat or pain or suffering to do so. Now, the kids today operating cash registers cannot count change in their own mind. It is really sad to see...

It used to be that the language, grammar, and emphasis that we used in the past was "more universally understood" - because, everyone was taught it and had a common understanding of it.

It used to be that smilies/emojis were supposed to be used sparingly.

Could it actually be true that you want me to use more smilies/emojis so that you do not have to think more intelligently about the words you are reading?

"Food for thought..."

 

[GaryA]

Hi Gary.... that's a lot for us to have to remember, just so we can interpret your tone . Do you think you could learn to use emojis more? They are more universally understood and there's quite a few to pick from . Hard to get mad at the face lol .

I really do appreciate the "kind gentle gesture" that you put into this response - it did not go unnoticed.

And, I am not trying to be too harsh with my response; rather, I am trying to be realistic about what I think the real problem is - a "dumbing-down" of society.

 

[GaryA]

Hi Gary.... that's a lot for us to have to remember, just so we can interpret your tone . Do you think you could learn to use emojis more? They are more universally understood and there's quite a few to pick from . Hard to get mad at the face lol .

Oh - and, by the way - yes, I could probably learn to use a few more emojis in places where it would be appropriate...

 

[GaryA]

Hi Gary.... that's a lot for us to have to remember, just so we can interpret your tone . Do you think you could learn to use emojis more? They are more universally understood and there's quite a few to pick from . Hard to get mad at the face lol .

Oh - and, one other thing - just to show you that I really do have a "softer" (playful) side...

Hard to get mad at the face lol .

Well - in that case...

 

[Lynx]

=^.^=

 

[Snackersmom]

It is not something that you should have to remember; rather, it is something you should be able to pick up on - and understand - based on what you learned from English grammar..... ...Could it actually be true that you want me to use more smilies/emojis so that you do not have to think more intelligently about the words you are reading?

"Food for thought..."

You are entitled to your opinion on the usage of emojis, but I can assure you my suggestion to utilize them more frequently had nothing to do with any personal desire to "think less intelligently" .

You stated in post 276 that when you place a sentence in italics it can imply NO LESS THAN 3 DIFFERENT TONES. THAT is too many to expect us to interpret, especially considering that NONE of your 3 possible interpretations actually follow the generally accepted guidelines for using italics.

I wouldn't have even stepped in with the emoji suggestion, except for the fact you have REPEATEDLY lamented that your posts are misunderstood. So I tried to help. And you replied with a rather insulting insinuation.

Pro tip: placing an insulting assertion in bold italics and calling it "food for thought" does not make it any less insulting.

I am not angry though. And there is no need to apologize. But please at least CONSIDER the possibility that the problem is not with our understanding, but rather with your communication.

 

[GaryA]

Okay. I am incapable of communicating effectively with other people. I will try nothing but dry text for a while and see how well that works. My remark was not intended to insult you. It was only intended to get you to think about it from a psychological point of view. At least try to believe that. Thank you for trying to help.

 

[Snackersmom]

Okay. I am incapable of communicating effectively with other people. I will try nothing but dry text for a while and see how well that works. My remark was not intended to insult you. It was only intended to get you to think about it from a psychological point of view. At least try to believe that. Thank you for trying to help.

Naw.... if I thought you were incapable of effective communication I wouldn't have bothered trying to help. So don't feel discouraged .

I did not think you were trying to insult me, and I'm not upset. My concern is more for your interactions with other people, because saying unintentionally insulting things is a common theme for you. But please don't let that discourage you either; it's just something to pray about and be conscious of. Onward upward!

As far as your attempt to get me to look at things from a psychological point of view..... if you knew me better you would know that is not necessary, I already look at pretty much everything from a psychological standpoint . But I assure you once again, the emoji suggestion was NOT for my benefit/understanding; I do not find you particularly difficult to understand but I see why others do.

Anyway.... all the best, and don't be discouraged. it will take some prayer and effort but I believe in you!

 

[GaryA]

Okay. I am incapable of communicating effectively with other people. I will try nothing but dry text for a while and see how well that works.

On the other hand...

Everything I do on here - and, I mean everything - is intended to be beneficial to others. Including, first and foremost, the way I write my posts. I did not say I was perfect. I said I tried to use what I do know to the best of my ability to communicate as effectively as possible. And, I am not going to apologize for it. My only request is that others at least try to meet me half way.

If any random person has a particular writing style - and, you get to know that person through their writing style - then, why am I any different? That is my writing style. And, again, it has the best of intent for the good of others. I use the various forms of emphasis to try to make up for what cannot be "seen" with this form of communication. And, there is not always a smiley/emoji to correctly explain some particular thing I am trying to get across.

Do I sometimes overdo it? Perhaps. Again, I am not perfect. But, I would like to assure you that my intentions are the absolute best in the world.

The only other option seems to be to write 50,000 more words to explain all of the "unseen" things that need further emphasis to properly communicate what I am trying to communicate.

My concern is more for your interactions with other people, because saying unintentionally insulting things is a common theme for you.

From your perspective...

Perhaps - just maybe - this comes from a generation gap of sorts - where-and-when I come from, folks do not carry their feelings on their sleeve nearly so much as later generations seem to these days. As far as I can tell, most of the cases on here where someone feels insulted by something I say - they are in a later/younger generation; whereas, most of the older folks are not affected in the same way nearly as much. Just a thought...

As far as your attempt to get me to look at things from a psychological point of view..... if you knew me better you would know that is not necessary, I already look at pretty much everything from a psychological standpoint . But I assure you once again, the emoji suggestion was NOT for my benefit/understanding; I do not find you particularly difficult to understand but I see why others do.

No - I do know you better - and, that is why I said it - to give you something to think about and consider. I followed it with the "food for thought" statement just to make sure you understood that it was only to get you to think about it. No accusations or insults intended - strictly a suggestion for a psychological thought exercise.

Finally, a statement to show you that I do appreciate you - thank you for the reminder to continually work towards the best balance of all available methods to produce the best result possible. (In spite of what may appear to some, my general motive really is to try to improve-as-I-go.)

 

[Lynx]

 

[Kekeli]

Well....I wonder how many gals are going to fit your idea of not being 'low hanging fruit'? Sounds like this idea could vastly limit your prospects . How beautiful are you contemplating? It also may sound to some a burden of needing to get along with a family you don't as much. I applaud you putting your preferences out there, and I hope there's gals that feel they could manage and/or qualify re your list.
I would like to think simple Christian chemistry with another person at some function would suffice as starters. Maybe adjust the list and be open to the Holy Spirit guiding you. I personally think true Christian people are beautiful bc it comes from the heart, the love of Christ in them. Also, what your Pastor said had to be a joke, there are many many fine girls desiring a family, just scroll the previous pages here and see. God bless you with the perfect gal for you, IJNA✝

Very true.This's godly advice.Brother! Take it

 

[Edith]

On the other hand...

Everything I do on here - and, I mean everything - is intended to be beneficial to others. Including, first and foremost, the way I write my posts. I did not say I was perfect. I said I tried to use what I do know to the best of my ability to communicate as effectively as possible. And, I am not going to apologize for it. My only request is that others at least try to meet me half way.

If any random person has a particular writing style - and, you get to know that person through their writing style - then, why am I any different? That is my writing style. And, again, it has the best of intent for the good of others. I use the various forms of emphasis to try to make up for what cannot be "seen" with this form of communication. And, there is not always a smiley/emoji to correctly explain some particular thing I am trying to get across.

Do I sometimes overdo it? Perhaps. Again, I am not perfect. But, I would like to assure you that my intentions are the absolute best in the world.

The only other option seems to be to write 50,000 more words to explain all of the "unseen" things that need further emphasis to properly communicate what I am trying to communicate.


From your perspective...

Perhaps - just maybe - this comes from a generation gap of sorts - where-and-when I come from, folks do not carry their feelings on their sleeve nearly so much as later generations seem to these days. As far as I can tell, most of the cases on here where someone feels insulted by something I say - they are in a later/younger generation; whereas, most of the older folks are not affected in the same way nearly as much. Just a thought...


No - I do know you better - and, that is why I said it - to give you something to think about and consider. I followed it with the "food for thought" statement just to make sure you understood that it was only to get you to think about it. No accusations or insults intended - strictly a suggestion for a psychological thought exercise.

Finally, a statement to show you that I do appreciate you - thank you for the reminder to continually work towards the best balance of all available methods to produce the best result possible. (In spite of what may appear to some, my general motive really is to try to improve-as-I-go.)

Hey Gary
Something I have learned recently as an evangelist is, even if what you are going to say is true, still be cautious and look for better ways to say it. You don't benefit anything at being right and hurting the other. How ever you want to admonish, edify and build in to Christlikeness. So release the truth in bits.

 

[Edith]

Very true.This's godly advice.Brother! Take it

Hello and welcome Kekeli
If I am not mistaken TabinRivCA is a lady

 

[Lynx]

Very true.This's godly advice.Brother! Take it

Howdy and welcome to the forum.

 

[GaryA]

Hey Gary
Something I have learned recently as an evangelist is, even if what you are going to say is true, still be cautious and look for better ways to say it. You don't benefit anything at being right and hurting the other. How ever you want to admonish, edify and build in to Christlikeness. So release the truth in bits.

Yes - I know that 'tact' is important. And, I know that different people have different levels of ability to handle the straight-forward truth they are being shown. However, on a platform such as this - it also does no good to always operate at the "lowest" level as if everyone who reads what you write must have three close friends and a box of tissues with them as they read it. Even that alone by itself will upset people who can handle more.

So - in the final analysis - you shoot for what would seem to fit most readers appropriately. For example - young or old - most folks on here are adults - and, should be able to handle processing certain ideas without being totally thrown off emotionally. Therefore, as a rule, I am not going to talk to them like little children. I expect that they have a certain level of maturity.

One evidence of that - sometimes lacking with some folks on here - but, generally present with most - is the ability to not be quick to assume the worst intent of the posts of others and look for and focus on the negative - even if it does not exist in the post they are reading. There are a few on here who will look for and focus on any-end-every imaginable negative thing they can conjure up out of their imagination as they read my posts - just because it is me - just because they do not like me - and, possibly, while not realizing that they are even doing it.

I tend to not hold grudges and have nothing at all against these folks. I am actually a fairly laid back and live-and-let-live kind of guy. However, I know what I believe - and, if stated with confidence - some folks "just can't handle" that.

It is never my intent to insult or belittle anyone - only, some are quick to assume that is the case. And, some of them are quick to assume that it is always the case without exception. But, it is simply not true.

Some on here do not seem to be able to handle it well if I "tell it like it is"/"tell it like I see it"; albeit, I say fairly often that everyone should treat every post (including mine) like it is simply the opinion of the author. I write what I write to be thought-provoking - to get people to think...

I am "releasing the truth in bits" - any more than that and people really cannot handle it.

And, of course, 'admonish, edify and build' is actually the goal - to help others to grow.

So - what I am saying is - the variation of personality types on this platform is wide - and, you cannot please everyone all the time. You can only estimate the 'average', 'median', or 'most' target audience - whatever seems appropriate for the discussion - to address with your thoughts on the topic.

I have learned to accept that some will "squeal" simply because it is me - someone else could say the very same exact thing and they would be okay with it.

But - whether they are willing to come to grips with reality or not - the "dumbing-down" thing is very real.

And - one of the most 'liberating' things a person can do is to realize and accept in humility the truth that they have been lied to about most everything since birth. But, that it is not their fault - they were only a victim of the evil intentions of evil men. THEN - they can begin to "grow" in ways they never imagined - shedding all manner of doubt and fear - having a clear conscience about the reality of the world they live in - no longer shackled by deception - able to lead others to the truth - knowing how to make a difference - not afraid to speak the truth in love for the sake of the people.

Such people do not feel insulted or get their feelings hurt by the truth - they embrace it. They stay humble because the truth - the real truth - keeps them humble. Their only hope is that they will be able to help others see the truth - because, it is absolutely necessary for the aforementioned 'difference' to be made.

Once you understand the real truth about the world we live in, a difference can be made - but, not alone as one person. Why? Because, the masses are "being played" by masterful evil men who have studied more than anyone how the human psyche works and have gone to great lengths to exploit it for their own benefit and the "enslavement" of the masses.

Until you understand how the world really works - you will only follow after the things that are done to make you 'react' in the way that "they" want you to - never reaching the proper conclusion (knowledge and understanding) so that you know what to not 'react' to. You can only make a difference if you "escape" the 'MATRIX' they have forced you into - controlling your thoughts and actions without you even realizing it.

The movie was/is not just entertainment - it is a documentary of the reality you live in - whereby, you do not realize just how much of your life is being manipulated in so many ways - to keep you enslaved in/to the 'system'.

Those who can "see" - and, who "know" - and, who "care" - are trying to get others to "wake up" to the reality of the world they live in - to "escape the MATRIX" - so that they can "become a part of the solution and not remain part of the problem"...

The problem - and, why the world is in the shape it is in - is that there are waaaaaaaaaay too many "dumbed-down" people in the world who are way too proud to admit that it is even possible and refuse to look at, see, realize, understand, and accept the reality of it.

The problem is that they feel "insulted" if you try to get them to wake up.

It is not their fault - they are a victim of evil doings. Yet, they have too much pride.

If they would only swallow their pride - so that they could be humble enough to obtain the awareness and discernment (please see the related statements in my signature) - so that they could see the truth - then they would wake up - "escape the MATRIX" - and, be in a better position to actually make a difference in the world.

In reality, there is much more to my posts than most folks realize - I am not some guy with an attitude trying to troll everyone with insults; rather, I am someone who cares enough to try to get others to focus on some very important things regarding the real truth of the world we live in.

I wish for everyone to know and understand the truth - about the Lord Jesus Christ - and, about the reality of the world they live in - which Satan is largely in control of right now. Christians of all people need to understand how Satan - their greatest enemy - who 'deceiveth the whole world' (Revelation 12:9) - "operates" in turning the world into his personal playground - all of which is based on lies.

No person will be able to fully understand the true reality of the world they live in unless they are willing to humble themselves to the point of realizing and accepting that they have in fact been deceived about nearly everything for their entire life. And, until they "wake up" to this conclusion - and, obtain a sufficient understanding of it - they will continue to support the 'system' that has them "enslaved" - and, will not understand what they must do to avoid the 'pitfalls' of it - for the sake of health and other things as well.

My intentions are the absolute best in the world. Unfortunately, I cannot help it if some folks cannot - or refuse - to see it that way.

 

[Lynx]

TLDR: