thoughts on...purity

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i'm not on my own answer, but this seems to just be the right answer, as no one has proved to me differently yet. And yes I'd love the OK to kiss, I don't need that from anyone except God, maybe you should understand I wanted ADVICE, not PERMISSION. I beg to differ about the teens saying its okay to kiss, 25% of the girls I hang out with (not all christian either) think kissing it icky, lol. but serisouly, they think its wrong.
 
I don't think I could ever see myself lasting six months without kissing someone I really like. I think that love is something that should be demonstrated, and kissing is but one example of something demonstrable you can do to make your partner feel loved. In terms of temptation, if you're really adamant about waiting until you're married to have sex, I can respect that, but I think that if you deprive your self from something quite harmless like kissing, then that might lead you to doing something which you would consider to be much worse.
 
Baptistrw said:
Your first kiss should be at the alter. Aint no sense in lighting the oven when you can't cook with it. I honestly think you're way too young to be dating but that's another story....
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I've heard a lot of people say that? What's so bad about kissing? And Baptist what do you believe is the right age to date?
 
My grandfather is a very wise man. And one day he said sam... NO TOUCHEY TOUCHEY........ and this is the motto i like to live by
 
okay, so kissing is a perfectly harmless way of showing your affection. The occasional kiss on the cheek or lips is fine. It's a way to show your affection to someone you truly care about in a more physical way. As long as you keep balance between the non physical and the physical kissing should be perfectly innocent
 
SamIam said:
My grandfather is a very wise man. And one day he said sam... NO TOUCHEY TOUCHEY........ and this is the motto i like to live by
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That's so funny! I guess NO TOUCHEY TOUCHEY is something to live by. I think that kissing is ok, but when it comes down to embracing and touching other than a hug that last a maximum of 2 seconds is really a place to draw the line. (and when i say kissing I mean pecks, no spit swappage!)
 
yes ik i sound like i'm contradicting myself, but i didn't explain fully in my first message
 
that you for everyone who answered, this helps a lot. right now i'm going through some tough decisions, becuase i made the mistake that chrstian guys that want to wait for sex don't also want to wait for other things. he got really irrateted that i wouldn't let him touch my butt, and kept asking why. i told him that it was something i only wanted my husband to do, and he said it was a stupid reason. idk...just so confused. and dont worry anyone im not giving into this, im just not really sure how to help him understand why. and also, i told him i wanted to make out with him (thankfuly my parents wont let us yet) and then i rethought the whole making out thing. and i just dont know. we've been going out for a year now and i feel bad for not kissing him, i'm not sure what to say about the making out, or even if i want to still do it, and i want him to stop thinking about my butt!! again, thanks for EVERYOEN that has commented, i love you, and am saying a thanks prayer for ya right now!
 
by dont also wan tot wait for other things, i met he DOES want to wait till hes marreid for sex, he DOESN'T want to wait to touch my butt or make out.
 
ok, you might think im bein old, but i bn there done that. here goes. kissing...too far as that can lead to more intimate things, hugging, holding hands....in front of others is best. Anything else, is too far. Basically think..."Would I do this in front of my parents?" If you wouldn't do it in front of your parents, then hon, you shouldn't be doin it at all.

My family said the same stuff to me when I was going out with my bf at the time, I didn't listen, I really regretted what we did.
 
personaly i dont think theres anythin wrong wiv kissing! its a great way to show ure affection&as long as u dont go too far i dont see anything wrong wiv it!!
 
thanks everyone! you are all really helping so so so much! I think that the advice about not doing it if you woudn't in front of your parents is awesome, and especially for me (i hate PDA, lol) anyways thanks holly and climbing upward! :D
 
Hey! I just want to say I am very proud of you. You seem really mature and I am proud that you have been mature enough in this situation to involve your parents and Let them know what is going on. You sound like you are very grounded and that God is your rock. Don't ever let that go. I am a youth minister and I see teens all the time who push the limit and who end up falling ALL the time. They end up compromising their morals and giving in to temptation. It is refreshing to see a teen who is willing to wait. I do have some girls who have made a vow to not even date in high school. Some have decided to give a year of their life to God after high school either on a mission trip in a Christian college or in some form of ministry and then worry about a partner. And some have decided to date. Everyone is different. Again I give you mad props for staying pure in a sin filled world. It is AWESOME!!!
 
Yeah I agree with Melissaakastorm. There is a verse that says don't let someone dispise your youthfulness and when someone tears someone down just because they are younger that's just wrong. We should be setting examples for the younger generation. Encouraging them to do better. Not to fall into sin, but set apart from the world. Keep going strong, however don't forget just because your a "strong" Christian doesn't keep you separate from everyone else and not sin. Just keep watch and be mindful of everything you are doing.

Personally I think kissing should be saved and for reasons lots of people have pointed out on the forums. It does lead to other things. Also if you kiss you do give part of your intamacy to that person. Think about it this way. . .How would you like for all of your past relationships to show up at your wedding and tell your spouse how wonderful that kiss or making out session was that you had back in the day. Think of your future wife/husband instead of using the most selfish excuse to try and just get what you want. Because that's all that is when you say that you have to show effection towards that person. If you truly love that person then you will wait. If you kiss are you doing it for that other person or are you doing it for your own personal gain? Think of that before you lock lips with someone you don't even know if your going to spend the rest of your life with.
 
Modest indulgence, however also helps prevent explosions. I think this is important to keep in mind, especially when you are dealing with strong repressed desires.
 
I am a teenager, and I have some advice.

I know my profile states that I was born in 1985, but I am very protective of my identity over the internet. I use the year 1985 as a default date of birth.

I think that it is alright to kiss when you are a teenager, especially if you have already been dating for six months. Buddha once heard a man explaining strings on an instrument to another man: "If the string is too loose, it will not play, if it is too tight, it will snap." I think you should find the middle ground. In this scenario.

I have been raised with a lot of atheists, and I have heard of many people engaging in sexual activities with multiple partners simultaneously. I believe that this is terrible. At the same time i know of teenagers having very intimate and sexual relationships with one partner for a number of years. I am not advocating that you engage in anything but kissing with your boyfriend, especially because you are a young teenager, but I do believe that it is important to establish sexual chemistry with someone before you marry them.

I think that sex is a very important part of being human, and that if you are going to make the commitment to remain with someone for the rest of your life you should ensure that your sexual connection is a strong one.

It sounds to me that you and your boyfriend are very careful about resisting temptation. I think that if you were to kiss and keep your physicality at kissing it would be proof that you are mature enough to handle kissing. If you find yourselves going too far you will immediately know and you will have the strength to stop. If you don't have the strength I am willing to be shame will stop you in your tracks.

I hope that this helps with your decision, and I hope you make the one that works for you!
-Zalen
 
Zalen said:
I am a teenager, and I have some advice.

I know my profile states that I was born in 1985, but I am very protective of my identity over the internet. I use the year 1985 as a default date of birth.

I think that it is alright to kiss when you are a teenager, especially if you have already been dating for six months. Buddha once heard a man explaining strings on an instrument to another man: "If the string is too loose, it will not play, if it is too tight, it will snap." I think you should find the middle ground. In this scenario.

I have been raised with a lot of atheists, and I have heard of many people engaging in sexual activities with multiple partners simultaneously. I believe that this is terrible. At the same time i know of teenagers having very intimate and sexual relationships with one partner for a number of years. I am not advocating that you engage in anything but kissing with your boyfriend, especially because you are a young teenager, but I do believe that it is important to establish sexual chemistry with someone before you marry them.

I think that sex is a very important part of being human, and that if you are going to make the commitment to remain with someone for the rest of your life you should ensure that your sexual connection is a strong one.

It sounds to me that you and your boyfriend are very careful about resisting temptation. I think that if you were to kiss and keep your physicality at kissing it would be proof that you are mature enough to handle kissing. If you find yourselves going too far you will immediately know and you will have the strength to stop. If you don't have the strength I am willing to be shame will stop you in your tracks.

I hope that this helps with your decision, and I hope you make the one that works for you!
-Zalen
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I have one thing to say to that. “Now flee from youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart” (2 Timothy 2:22); “But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts” (Romans 13:14)
 
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