I had fun... Moments lol. Never gonna be stuck in a car for 20 hours again though just to get somewhere lol.I missed you. Welcome back ! Have fun ???
You know, I'm pretty self aware... I think I know what a jerk looks like. What one acts like. I'm not as openly caring as some. Not so... loving or tender as others. I tried to be at one point. But you know? People walked all over me. Used me. This just didn't help with the bitterness I tried to let go of.
Yeah, that sounds like me. Pushing people away just seems like the most logical way to avoid feeling worse then I usually do.
He's always text/chat poking people! O:Does what...?? Homer Simpson & Ugly look alike or something? I don't see it. Or is this some sort of inside joke between you two crazy kids?
I feel like I tend to be involved when you have these moments xDI'm not entirely sure if I'm awake or just having a really weird dream right now.
Setting standards is very good. But the thing is the friends keeping those standards. Otherwise it does not really matter. In fact, I just lost my gf and good friend because she did not hold to what she said she would do.
Good morning everyone.
Just a side thought I wanted to talk about and see what you all think. I have a heart full of love, like I literally cannot hate people even if they hate me. I just can't, I love haha.
But.. I love with this feeling that I will be hurt. Everyone in my life I have loved has hurt me. And now I love knowing I will be hurt. I have been like this a long time. But after this break up, it seems to be even worse. Does anyone else ever feel like this?
It almost feels like a fake love, like "I love you, but you will hurt me and this love will not matter" Of course its real love, but not full love.
Its confusing me, and I really don't know what to do..
You know I often feel a bit under achieved when I work the Sunday School kids. The woman before me is an actual teacher, teacher. She was very organized and really good. She taught SS for years. Not me, I got thrown in. It was like,, oh great you're human, you breath, you're not to scary, you can teach Sunday school. In other words, it's very hard to find volunteers. So I go, and I do my best. It's not even a big class, but I still feel like, how will I keep there attention?
One week I was feeling pretty crappy about it because I had a bad day, but then one of the kids hugged me and said, thanks for the rice crispy treats and letting us throw balls at you and each other.
OK, so I'm not perfect, but heck I'm the one who brings good food and doesn't mind being whacked with a ball. So I'm good with them and God.![]()
So...it's time to stop the junk food kick I've been on. I feel 10 different kinds of craptastical, and now this swollen ankles/feet thing...yeah. I let myself get stuck in this rut of "convenience" meals, i.e, frozen pizzas and other effortless junk because I was having issues giving a hoot about anything at all, let alone what I ate. I mean, under normal circumstances, I'm not exactly a health nut (no offense to those here who eat healthy!) but the last 3 or so weeks have been too much even for me.
I have no idea how I've stayed right at 210 through all this. I don't honestly care what the scale says but ugh, I've got to get my energy back.
Dang, this means I'll have to like...COOK. Woe is me!