Something to think about in fellowship

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Willow

Willow

Well-known member
#1
Oct 10, 2021
435
405
63
ohio
#1
Sometimes feel like I am back in high school in some of these forums or in chat. At times I sit back and just watch and listen .Many times gives me ideas how to pray for some. We have the clicks, we have at times the cyber bullies and we have the ones trying to fit in. Oh and cannot forget the spoofers.
Learning to watch and listen can tell you alot . I try to keep things light, I figure we need a stress reliever . Have good fellowship with other believers. Maybe put yourself in their shoes and pray you see people thru his eyes.
Most of all many need to stop trying to find fault in everyone. It does not make you look smarter ,but ignorant and at times uncaring.
I think maybe the world has taught some it is ok to be rude and nasty rather right or wrong. There is a difference between giving the truth in love and being arrogant. I have been there and done that. I thought I had to be right. But fruits of the spirit are; The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control . Just a thought when you do not agree with someone. It is ok to not agree, it is not ok to belittle and hit below the belt ,when discussing things. I am not sure how that is going to change anyone's thinking.Plus the fact they have to want to change. Also only God can change them. Best to drop it at times and agree to disagree. Then give it to God.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#2
Aug 13, 2014
27,741
9,661
113
#2
Willow said:
Best to drop it at times and agree to disagree. Then give it to God.
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Unfortunately pride will often not permit that. Ya just gotta prove you are right, even if the people who said you are wrong are miles and miles away and you'll never meet them.

Also it's easier to be a jerk to words on a screen than to people in the same room.

duty_calls.png
 
Mii

Mii

Well-known member
#4
Mar 23, 2019
2,082
1,330
113
#4
Well, for me it's not "too" much different because of the internet. It's still the collective body of Christ and this is on public display. In private? Quite a different story.

It's not that I'm hypocritical, it's just that the extremes are much deeper. I actually find it easier to walk away from an internet disagreement than one in person because I legitimately have to "walk away" or cause them to do so.

Walking away always feels weird and awkward in person and well...I guess I'll stop now because of what I said in the first sentence ;)


But yeah, I think that sometimes we need to intentionally remember that we are still children and still maturing.
None of us always "has it all". It's true that some have a lot...but even if you do, that doesn't mean that you'll ever be able to impart your words in a way that speaks to someone.

There is a verse in Proverbs 25:11 that I like and have been trying to remember when I feel a person should hear something "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver." and then verse 12 is similar. There's a timing to saying something and you personally may not ever have that timing present itself to you. In fact, it seems probable that if indeed it is the Holy Spirit giving you insight into that person, it may not even be you that speaks it. Why do "you" need to be that person so long as it is done somewhere? Just pray about it.

For me (and this has happened at least twice on CC that I recall) I just get up from the PC and go on a walk before responding. It's a forum, not a chatroom...you have that ability due to the pacing. Make use of it. A good half the time when I walk away...I realize it wasn't that important "RIGHT THEN" or it cools me down a little bit to take a step back and I can respond calmly.

OR let someone else handle it. If you REALLY think that this is something the Lord wants something posted...then it will be. I've seen it things handled pretty well by mods and other users when I get "too close" to something and walk away. Like when there's a troll or something...no reason why you can't "pass the baton" so to speak. It's pretty cool actually.



I do wonder if people did this more often or at all...what CC would be like. Excepting trolls, flamers, etc. ofc.

Great post btw, welcome to CC
 
Subhumanoidal

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
#5
Sep 17, 2018
4,102
3,200
113
#5
Willow said:
Sometimes feel like I am back in high school in some of these forums or in chat. At times I sit back and just watch and listen .Many times gives me ideas how to pray for some. We have the clicks, we have at times the cyber bullies and we have the ones trying to fit in. Oh and cannot forget the spoofers.
Learning to watch and listen can tell you alot . I try to keep things light, I figure we need a stress reliever . Have good fellowship with other believers. Maybe put yourself in their shoes and pray you see people thru his eyes.
Most of all many need to stop trying to find fault in everyone. It does not make you look smarter ,but ignorant and at times uncaring.
I think maybe the world has taught some it is ok to be rude and nasty rather right or wrong. There is a difference between giving the truth in love and being arrogant. I have been there and done that. I thought I had to be right. But fruits of the spirit are; The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control . Just a thought when you do not agree with someone. It is ok to not agree, it is not ok to belittle and hit below the belt ,when discussing things. I am not sure how that is going to change anyone's thinking.Plus the fact they have to want to change. Also only God can change them. Best to drop it at times and agree to disagree. Then give it to God.
Click to expand...
A well intended post, but one that has fallen continuously on deaf ears for years and years on this site.
Appearing to always be right is often the greater magnitude here than being right with God.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#6
Aug 13, 2014
27,741
9,661
113
#6
Subhumanoidal said:
A well intended post, but one that has fallen continuously on deaf ears for years and years on this site.
Appearing to always be right is often the greater magnitude here than being right with God.
Click to expand...
It's entertaining though... Sometimes on a slow day I have been known to think to myself, "Oh good, an argumentative person just popped up in Singles" and grab the popcorn.
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#7
May 23, 2009
16,713
5,623
113
#7
Lynx said:
It's entertaining though... Sometimes on a slow day I have been known to think to myself, "Oh good, an argumentative person just popped up in Singles" and grab the popcorn.
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Hey now!

I resemble that remark. :ROFL:

Well at least your popcorn bucket is never empty. :geek:
 
birdinmypalm

birdinmypalm

Member
#10
Feb 23, 2021
81
78
18
#10
Mii said:
Well, for me it's not "too" much different because of the internet. It's still the collective body of Christ and this is on public display. In private? Quite a different story.

It's not that I'm hypocritical, it's just that the extremes are much deeper. I actually find it easier to walk away from an internet disagreement than one in person because I legitimately have to "walk away" or cause them to do so.

Walking away always feels weird and awkward in person and well...I guess I'll stop now because of what I said in the first sentence ;)


But yeah, I think that sometimes we need to intentionally remember that we are still children and still maturing.
None of us always "has it all". It's true that some have a lot...but even if you do, that doesn't mean that you'll ever be able to impart your words in a way that speaks to someone.

There is a verse in Proverbs 25:11 that I like and have been trying to remember when I feel a person should hear something "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver." and then verse 12 is similar. There's a timing to saying something and you personally may not ever have that timing present itself to you. In fact, it seems probable that if indeed it is the Holy Spirit giving you insight into that person, it may not even be you that speaks it. Why do "you" need to be that person so long as it is done somewhere? Just pray about it.

For me (and this has happened at least twice on CC that I recall) I just get up from the PC and go on a walk before responding. It's a forum, not a chatroom...you have that ability due to the pacing. Make use of it. A good half the time when I walk away...I realize it wasn't that important "RIGHT THEN" or it cools me down a little bit to take a step back and I can respond calmly.

OR let someone else handle it. If you REALLY think that this is something the Lord wants something posted...then it will be. I've seen it things handled pretty well by mods and other users when I get "too close" to something and walk away. Like when there's a troll or something...no reason why you can't "pass the baton" so to speak. It's pretty cool actually.



I do wonder if people did this more often or at all...what CC would be like. Excepting trolls, flamers, etc. ofc.

Great post btw, welcome to CC
Click to expand...
This recently happened to me in the Conspiracy Forum. I got tangled up in a thread that was really upsetting me. Everyone was quoting me, so the alerts kept coming and I kept getting drawn back in. One person in particular was hatefully argumentative. Each time, my blood would boil and I felt so angry! I would start to respond and then stop (and erase) because I realized how upset I was. Type and erase. Type and erase. 😯🤐 It's hard not to respond. I felt like I needed to defend myself. And defend God! To prove with all the Scriptures, when I really just wanted to say, "Have you read the Bible?" But that would be my anger in action. Each time, I had to force myself away from the keyboard.

Although I used to thrive on that kind of internet battle ... I just don't have the heart for it anymore. I've seen many wonderful forums get destroyed by internal warfare. This should never happen on a Christian site.

I just learned how to put a person on Ignore! Yay! Think of all the harsh exchanges this will avoid! WooHoo!
 
Mii

Mii

Well-known member
#11
Mar 23, 2019
2,082
1,330
113
#11
birdinmypalm said:
This recently happened to me in the Conspiracy Forum. I got tangled up in a thread that was really upsetting me. Everyone was quoting me, so the alerts kept coming and I kept getting drawn back in. One person in particular was hatefully argumentative. Each time, my blood would boil and I felt so angry! I would start to respond and then stop (and erase) because I realized how upset I was. Type and erase. Type and erase. 😯🤐 It's hard not to respond. I felt like I needed to defend myself. And defend God! To prove with all the Scriptures, when I really just wanted to say, "Have you read the Bible?" But that would be my anger in action. Each time, I had to force myself away from the keyboard.


I just learned how to put a person on Ignore! Yay! Think of all the harsh exchanges this will avoid! WooHoo!
Click to expand...
Yeah there are some people that aren't believers on this site and it can be like "casting your pearls..."

They just suck up all the energy it takes you to respond to them and it appears to do nothing. I've learned to just quote them and wait for a response (though it is hard) and then maybe quote once more...if they "still" don't respond, I move on, although it is difficult sometimes.

With regard to deletions/edits...sometimes it seems there is no real way to respond to someone. It is irritating and different than being in person and "walking away" looks differently, but it has the added benefit of a opportunity to grow in maturity and focus on self-control as a fruit of the spirit.


That's why the initial post about the fruits of the Spirit I like so much...it's easy to forget (or at least for it to take a "sideline") but then I reallly "want" to still post but is that what I "need" to do? Would the Lord have me do that? Most times the answer is no.

Reminds me of James and John being called the Boanerges and why they were called that. Paraphrase: Lord, shall we call down fire from heaven to devour them?!?!? Jesus: Calm down, you are forgetting yourself. Look toward me, and leave them to me.

It's a funny thing that I've learned quite a bit on this forum on what being an image bearer is. I've learned SO much more about discord and dissention and to be mindful not to be involved in that at all as much as is possible.



Peacemaking when others are at each others throats is another topic entirely but "that" is challenging on the internet too lol. People hate that, but every so often there seems to be a time and a place where it is productive.
 
birdinmypalm

birdinmypalm

Member
#12
Feb 23, 2021
81
78
18
#12
Mii said:
Yeah there are some people that aren't believers on this site and it can be like "casting your pearls..."

They just suck up all the energy it takes you to respond to them and it appears to do nothing. I've learned to just quote them and wait for a response (though it is hard) and then maybe quote once more...if they "still" don't respond, I move on, although it is difficult sometimes.

With regard to deletions/edits...sometimes it seems there is no real way to respond to someone. It is irritating and different than being in person and "walking away" looks differently, but it has the added benefit of a opportunity to grow in maturity and focus on self-control as a fruit of the spirit.


That's why the initial post about the fruits of the Spirit I like so much...it's easy to forget (or at least for it to take a "sideline") but then I reallly "want" to still post but is that what I "need" to do? Would the Lord have me do that? Most times the answer is no.

Reminds me of James and John being called the Boanerges and why they were called that. Paraphrase: Lord, shall we call down fire from heaven to devour them?!?!? Jesus: Calm down, you are forgetting yourself. Look toward me, and leave them to me.

It's a funny thing that I've learned quite a bit on this forum on what being an image bearer is. I've learned SO much more about discord and dissention and to be mindful not to be involved in that at all as much as is possible.



Peacemaking when others are at each others throats is another topic entirely but "that" is challenging on the internet too lol. People hate that, but every so often there seems to be a time and a place where it is productive.
Click to expand...
I love all that you said, Mii. Most especially, I'm glad you reminded us of that moment that James and John had with Jesus. Perfect. :)
 
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