I have debated and gone back and forth in my mind about whether to post this or not. It's somewhat raw and leaves me kind of vulnerable and I don't trust easily so to put it on the internet is terrifying, especially considered there's literally only one other person I have shared this with within the 2 years that I wrote it. But, I'm just going to put it out there, maybe it will help someone else or give someone a deeper perspective of me.
I wrote this about 2 years ago or so. It's about both my personal physical scars and emotional scars (though mainly the physical) but it could go for any kind of scar or pain in life, really. Also, the way it's spaced is the way I wrote it, so it is supposed to be in this type of format, though it may look a bit strange.
Anyway, enough rambling. Here we go.
----------------------------------------------
Scars
My scars are
Constant
Visible
Reminders of who I once was.
Reminders of what I did to YOUR temple.
Even when covered
They scream at me
They are still there.
I try to remember how it was YOUR pain, YOUR suffering, YOUR scars, YOUR LOVE that saved me.
That made me realize that I don't have to hurt myself
To feel better.
That I don't have to see myself bleed
To get the pain inside to come out.
But my scars are still there
To haunt me.
God, how can You love me when I did this to myself?
How can You call me
Beautiful
Loved
Valuable?
When my scars are
Hideous
Unlovable.
Jesus, how could someone perfect like You
Love someone as imperfect as me?
Then I hear You gently say
"There is nothing you can do
Nothing you can't look like
Nothing that you can do or will do that will keep you from being
MY HOLY CHILD."
My scars scream truth mixed with lies and I struggle to hear God over the noise.
But I know God's love.
It can set me free
From the chains of myself.
I can hardly fathom it.
You say that all things work together for YOUR glory.
Could it be that my scars are
Constant
Visible
Reminders of who I once was
But, now,
Constant
Visible
Reminders of how You saved my soul and restored me?
I wrote this about 2 years ago or so. It's about both my personal physical scars and emotional scars (though mainly the physical) but it could go for any kind of scar or pain in life, really. Also, the way it's spaced is the way I wrote it, so it is supposed to be in this type of format, though it may look a bit strange.
Anyway, enough rambling. Here we go.
----------------------------------------------
Scars
My scars are
Constant
Visible
Reminders of who I once was.
Reminders of what I did to YOUR temple.
Even when covered
They scream at me
They are still there.
I try to remember how it was YOUR pain, YOUR suffering, YOUR scars, YOUR LOVE that saved me.
That made me realize that I don't have to hurt myself
To feel better.
That I don't have to see myself bleed
To get the pain inside to come out.
But my scars are still there
To haunt me.
God, how can You love me when I did this to myself?
How can You call me
Beautiful
Loved
Valuable?
When my scars are
Hideous
Unlovable.
Jesus, how could someone perfect like You
Love someone as imperfect as me?
Then I hear You gently say
"There is nothing you can do
Nothing you can't look like
Nothing that you can do or will do that will keep you from being
MY HOLY CHILD."
My scars scream truth mixed with lies and I struggle to hear God over the noise.
But I know God's love.
It can set me free
From the chains of myself.
I can hardly fathom it.
You say that all things work together for YOUR glory.
Could it be that my scars are
Constant
Visible
Reminders of who I once was
But, now,
Constant
Visible
Reminders of how You saved my soul and restored me?
