Paperback writer

[Lanolin]

Theres a cure for this

I seem to be reading medical memoirs and must say its very punishing to go through medical school the amount of stress and bullying going on as its very hierarchical is phenomenal but I suppose the reward is the relationship you have with patients that you can do something that will save their lives or improve them

I have worked for hospitals thougn only as a gardener and never saw any patients ever the whole time I worked there outside on the grounds, seemed like such a shame, beautiful gardens and nobody there to appreciate them, they were all inside, possibly dying

 

[Lanolin]

Returned paperbacks ' theres a cure for this' and also 'the art of sewing' Lord knows I cant learn to sew when its cheaper to buy clothes readymade than to spend hours sewing your own, the cost of the fabric alone cant even compare, not to mention all the equipment and tools you need.

Its not wonder that so many women no longer sew. And Ive not really known men to do it. Even though they could if they wanted, its just one of those jobs men dont see as cool, while being a top chef has celebrity status now.

 

[Lanolin]

Nealry finished 'your life in your hands' by professor Jane Plant

Its very scientific and I think I should go back to reading novels. If it was a sci fi novel it would be about how, in the future, adults who were never weaned off cows milk start getting strange growths and mutating to turn bovine.

Men start getting man boobs and womens boobs start getting lumps like they are growing another udder.
But nobody knows its actually cheese thats responsible for killing the human population.

 

[jennymae]

Nealry finished 'your life in your hands' by professor Jane Plant

Its very scientific and I think I should go back to reading novels. If it was a sci fi novel it would be about how, in the future, adults who were never weaned off cows milk start getting strange growths and mutating to turn bovine.

Men start getting man boobs and womens boobs start getting lumps like they are growing another udder.
But nobody knows its actually cheese thats responsible for killing the human population.

Now that’s a cheesy one. Is that good professor a nuclear plant?

 

[Lanolin]

Now that’s a cheesy one. Is that good professor a nuclear plant?

nah shes actually scientist

I respect anyone who can wade through scientifically peer reviewed journals and pull out research and figure out what is biased and what isnt. But its very dense reading and wont be taken notice of by the population at large, but if a sci fi horror novel was made of it, maybe.

 

[Lanolin]

Read a memoir called Dear Reader about a barmaid/bookseller who worked in Harrods and taught her dad how to read.

Bookselling can be a thankless job dont I know it.
She had several recommendations but would often run her fingers along books and if her fingers tingled she knew it was the right one. Thats not quite my method but close enough.

I dont have her knack of talking to strangers about books and I seem to befriend people who never read anything and are proud they are so ignorant. But then you can tell a person by the kind of books they read. I once dated a conman whos favourite book was 'Rich Dad, poor Dad'

 

[timemeddler]

sci fi fantasy, about a mermaid, a vampire, and a werewolf and conspiracies.

 

[Lanolin]

saw a paperback in the library called Chlorine, its a YA book about a mermaid. The mermaid wants to be human of course, but shes stuck having a tail. Its set in a lot of swimming pools.

Another I came across was called The curse of the wererabbit. Its a novelisation of the Wallace and Gromit claymation about rabbits that are really werewolves. Not to be confused with Bunnicula.

My favourite are the Holly Webb books about magical animals, or injured stray kittens that get adopted into new homes.

 

[Lanolin]

Ive read plenty of conspiracy books about what happened to Princess Diana

The one her son Prince Harry wrote, was that she didnt really die but went into hiding and was going to reappear and say it was all a joke/trick she faked her own death to get away from the paps.

The one written by the bodyguard claimed he had no idea what happened, lost all his memory, but found the press too intrusive after his face got reconstructed.

The Diana Chronicles claimed she went to her astrologers who predicted her own death but she didnt heed the warnings to wear a seatbelt

 

[timemeddler]

saw a paperback in the library called Chlorine, its a YA book about a mermaid. The mermaid wants to be human of course, but shes stuck having a tail. Its set in a lot of swimming pools.

Another I came across was called The curse of the wererabbit. Its a novelisation of the Wallace and Gromit claymation about rabbits that are really werewolves. Not to be confused with Bunnicula.

My favourite are the Holly Webb books about magical animals, or injured stray kittens that get adopted into new homes.

In my story's case it a average girl who gets turned into one, and they have to figure out how and why.

 

[Lanolin]

In my story's case it a average girl who gets turned into one, and they have to figure out how and why.

Detective Lanolin on the case...did she eat too many scallops?

 

[timemeddler]

Detective Lanolin on the case...did she eat too many scallops?

no, happened after being sucked through a wormhole and turning up a few days later in puerto rico with no memory of the in between.

 

[Lanolin]

no, happened after being sucked through a wormhole and turning up a few days later in puerto rico with no memory of the in between.

Sounds a bit like The Midnight Library

Well no actually but the wormhole bit. In this one the protagonist, who is 'an average girl' goes into a library and chooses different lives from thousands of books and lives them for a while until she decides she doesn't like it and moves on to the next. Sort of like Quantum Leap (if you ever saw that tv show)

 

[Lanolin]

I finished reading Kitchens a 20th century history

My head is now full of refrigerators, electric frypans and microwaves. If the historian had carried on her study, I guess she'd have to include air fryers.

Most houses simply do not have the bench space to accomodate all these appliances. That's why they've knocked down the walls and made them open plan. Now everyone can view your messy kitchen.

 

[Lanolin]

I have to hide the kitchen book I got from the library from @Eli in case he accuses me of not doing any research.

my latest paperback is anticancer and from the tonne of research in it I am now alarmed that anything that says BPA free has probably got something worse or even more carcinogenic like BS-2

its like how people quit smoking and turned to vapes, but they are just even worse than tobacco

Arent we swimming in a sea of estrogen from VOCs and plastic chemicals anyway which is why males are turning female, not just in the animal kingdom but in humans too, and they cant help it?

Females are turning male too as Ive noticed after a certain age many females now have deep voices, short cropped hair, start growing facial hair and wearing pants after having mastectomies and hysteroectimies.

But that could be just the effects of chemo? Or steroids. I dont know.

Its like little dogs these days can fit into handbags. You think hold on is that a puppy or a dog with its legs cut off and it turns out its a corgi.

The plant kingdom is light years ahead though, theyve already figured out how to reproduce asexually and are often non binary, having their own stem cells etc. With plants you can just graft some on to each other and make another plant, though hybridisation never breeds true. The truth seems so much stranger than science fiction. Science fiction is still in its dystopian apocalyptic phase and hasnt figured out the cure for cancer yet.

In the Fasting Games, its the people who can fast the longest survivng on just chickpeas and soya beans that win after all the food sacrificed to idols that people ate has turned everyone into bovines and people have died from overeating the golden calf meat.

 

[Lanolin]

Am reading a paperback called Hedge by Jane Delury

The main character is called Maud.

Shes a garden historian with a troubled marriage and two daughters who meets a fellow landscape gardener who can excite all her passions (about gardening?) so who knows where this will end...in the bushes??

 

[Lanolin]

ugh my paperback turned into a horrible *spoiler* marriage breakup and infidelity with the daughter cutting herself and false accusations and other weird stuff. I was expecting something about hedges. Or maybe a secret garden or some kind of topiary.

The wife just ended up gardening on alcatraz island divorced and taking her two daughters. I think the moral of the story is, first husband cheats on wife, so wife cheats with someone else and they both end up happily divorced after their children find out.

 

[Lanolin]

I picked up a paperback memoir called Pageboy by Elliot Page

Its about a girl whos parents divorced when she was two. She didnt like being a girl. Her stepmother hated her very exisitence but she kept going back and forth between her parents. She got into acting and was good at it and decided she wanted to be a boy. When she saved up enough money she had top surgery and cut off her breasts and took testosterone and now she wants to be known as a he.

He still sits down at the toilet though.
I think a lot of people have this impulse to run away from home and join the circus...that sentiment hasnt changed. The circus (and the cosmeticians) makes a lot of money from all this gender dysphoria, it seems to me.

 

[Lanolin]

Two Caravans by Marina Lewyncka
I'm sure I must have read this one before but may have forgotten. It's about strawberry picking. Kind of like the Grapes of Wrath, but set in the UK.

This surprises me that there hasn't been a Great New Zealand Novel written about sheep shearing, or sharemilking, or maybe deer hunting. Or even growing kumara and the all important arrival of the potato. Most books are written about NZ disasters of some kind of another, with our failing public transport and or dangerous roads. Inevitably characters die not by gunshot or clever hidden despatches as they do in international novels but just by swerving off the road into a ditch.

 

[Lanolin]

Yellowface by Rebecca F Kuang

A white female writer steals her chinese american fellow writers manuscript and passes it off as her own, who dies in a freak accident. No this is not SWF single white female but more petty jealousies and literary tokenism. I wanted to know exactly what kind of whiteness the narrator was but the book didnt say. Was she actually English American or was she just your generic white person who went to Yale. Cue cultural appropriation.

In america theres different kinds right? Yanks, rednecks, descendants from the Mayflower, 'white trash' WASP...English, Irish, Scots or Welsh and any that came from the many many countries in Europe.

I dont know that anybody really refers to themselves as white when Asian people dont even say they are yellow and are more specific aboutwhat village/tribe they are from. We watch the simpsons or play with lego for ACTUAL yellow people.

I wanted the hungry ghost meme to take over after the narrator wrote herself into a corner.