Interracial dating. What are your thoughts?

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Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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what is a race? if you just talking physical characteristics, there doesnt seem to be any rhyme or reason to how people look, we are all mixtures of our parents unless our parents married their clone or twin.

I am not sure why blondes are the prefered hair colour ok Goldilocks you may have won the lottery of hair colour BUT there are downsides to being blonde...you have no eyebrows, you have to keep having to wear mascara to make your eyes stand out, you have peach fuzz, and people only really like you for your hair. If you try to shave it or colour it a different colour, people will be alarmed that youve become mentallly ill.

Also, everyone that wants to be blonde goes a bit crazy because the bleach goes straight through their skull into their brain and its a poisonous chemical. Plus all the blonde jokes, like you cannot be a lawyer like Reese witherspoon was in Legally Blonde and that you must have a supply of pink clothes and high heels because of Barbie.
 

Sweetest1

New member
Mar 17, 2023
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I think interracial is beautiful. "Interfaith" confuses me tho. 😅
 

Lanolin

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Interfaith --- Thats when all the religious people hang out together and ask each other about their faith it just keeps out the atheists I guess.
 

I_am_Canadian

Senior Member
Dec 8, 2014
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I'm black, Haitian. But I find myself attracted to mostly men of other races
I love my race and black men but for some reason. I find myself dating guys other than black men. Why? I don't know and I don't care. I was just curious. Maybe it's because I'm always interested in others' cultures?! Let me know what your thoughts and experiences are...shoot!!
Hey, if the man is a Christian like yourself and shares the same convictions, morals and values, skin is just skin, don't worry about it. Worry about important things and don't sweat the little things.
 
Mar 16, 2023
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Race shouldn't be an issue. Love is love. When you and the other person share the same values, the rest doesn't matter!
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
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All forms of dating are to be avoided at all cost.

Once dating starts, marriage is a possibility, and once your married, divorce can happen.' - Proverb from kinda



 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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I think its not really an issue when you live in a cosmopolitan city...i.e mix of all kinds of people, mostly immigrants who dont expect it to be all the same as where they came from.

But with patterns of migration being what they are, and human tendencies to stick with their own families and kinds and common languages, I have found if you come from a small town thats very insular, provincial and narrow minded you families are not going to be accepting of who you are friends with much less who you marry.

I have noticed this in schools and its not so much ' race' being the obvious point of difference between people but more like rich and poor. Rich people tend to live in their own little enclaves and poor in their own ghettos and they generally do not mix, they have separate schools, different gangs and clubs, have certain rules of whos in and whos out, and that affects who they hang out with.

It can become extreme like apartheid in South Africa. In fact a lot of South African immigrants to nz are 'white' christians who've fled and they all tend to go to their own christian schools and not mix with other people. Catholics also have their own schools, and do not mix with what they call protestants. Catholics originally were mostly irish in nz. But now there are a lot of Filipino catholics.

Quakers tend to be British. Baptist churches are a mixture but the leadership always seems to be white male, and Presbyterian are run by scottish elders who generally come from money. But that is changing. Theres also the perspective that anyone from the Pacific Islands is a temporary worker who doesnt belong and can only do labouring jobs nobody else wants to do. It was the same with Chinese, a lot of people have steretoypes about them but even within Chinese culture there is now a marked difference between rich and poor.
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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The issue that rich people often have and this has always been their dilemma is...do they marry a peasant?

How can a peasant fit into the lifestyle they have grown accustomed to? lol
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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I read his memoir about a scots descended nzer who went out with a maori nzer in the 1950s. She had to keep her maori boyfriend secret from her mother because she didnt approve. She learned how to speak maori at university and he was in the class too. Rather than learn French for her degree.

However it didnt work out. I think if you are young (under 21) and back then they needed parent appoval to be married or together it wasnt the done thing to run away from home.

Though am sure loads of interacial couples DID get together anyway despite what their parents may have thought. Parents seem to have a lot of sway on what they dont like for their children though.

Having racist parent(s) cant be easy!
 

Lanolin

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was thinking on this

I have many friends whos parents are from different cultures so its not like its this big taboo anymore. Even my own parents who are born in different countries and cultures. It was my mother who had to adapt and learn to live in another culture while my native dad didnt have to move or adapt anywhere. So even if they are the same 'race' there are still fundamental differences in my parents cultures (or lack of)

Your children are going to create their own culture. It will be different from yours.

In samoa they have a name for it Afakasi
Others identify as 'mulatto' or mixed, but nobody likes to say they are half this or half that. Most people like to identify as both.

The principal of my previous school was, like the young woman in the memoir I read 'one minute crying time' a scots decended nzer but she married her Maori boyfriend and had children. She could speak fluent Maori but I think her children would have learned both worlds. In nz education is now all in english but there are bilingual schools now. However with urbanisation and everything the maori way of life got lost for a generation or so, though its slowly coming back to full expression. Back in the day youd just get beaten for speaking maori in public.

I have gone out with all types of people of all races. My observation is that speaking english doesnt mean you necessarily become English though there is a certain anglophilia in my family I am not sure I like ALL aspects of English culture though theres lots to admire, sometimes the whole 'white privelige' thing gets a bit much when you get treated like someone whos exotic and dosnt belong. But maybe you dont want to belong anyway and create your own culture. Im sure that americans think the same thing even if they all speak english they think of themselves as amorphously 'american' no matter where their parents come from.
 

Lanolin

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Good book to read

Born a Crime by Trevor Noah

In South Africa they had apartheid. It was ILLEGAL to date (marry, or have children) with someone who wasnt your own 'race'

If you lived somewhere like that, you'd be breaking the law. But people did anyway.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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marathon?

run for 4 hours, although I wouldnt call that 'racing' just running.

speed dating is racing.
Anyway if you date your own 'race' too much there's going to be inbreeding as the royal families found out. But it was only royalty that was always totally obesessed with 'breeding' and 'pedigree' so you can thank them for being a bunch of racists and being a terrible example as far as marriages go.
 
G

George0115

Guest
I have a thing for asian women. This is sort of a new thing for me. I'm not sure how this even came about. I never really been interested in them until recently. I know this isn't a race but, I also dig amish women. How weird is that? They don't show any skin, so I'm not sure what turns me on about them lol.