Hello!

[fighting4happy]

My name is Caitlin and I'm 21 from the UK.
I was saved in 2016 after almost committing suicide.
I have always felt the pull of our Lord all my life but didn't want to speak out due to society's judgement. What would people I hung around with think if I told them I was religious? Would they think I was a prude or a weirdo?
I was drugged one night as a teen and I begged for death. I was in so much pain and was so scared I asked my dad to kill me as I lay in the back of a police car.
Eventually I moved on but three years later I was in college and had a breakdown. I planned to kill myself I stopped eating, showering, brushing my teeth everything until my Mum took me to the doctor and I simply said "I don't want to be here anymore." Weeks later I remembered I had an old Bible from highschool and felt a desire so strong I cannot put into words to find this Bible. Ripped my house apart looking for it and I finally did.
I confessed my sins (and trust me I did a lot of stupid things) and opened a relationship with God. It's funny now I think about it like He was waiting for me the whole time.
Now I have severe PTSD from that night and other serious traumatic events (I've been beaten, had a loaded gun to me so many near death experiences) and I haven't left my house properly in six years because of the panic attacks and triggers. There are days I ask the Lord why I'm still alive, why is there constant fear in my head but love for life and love for the Lord in my heart? With Him I don't feel like a victim I feel like light shines through out me, He makes me never want to be weak again. I pray everyday.
I've been in therapy and am currently in EDMR but I've always wanted Christian friends to pray with, to discuss the Bible and His love. The struggles I have with faith sometimes, the struggles of everyday. I never had any Christian friends and I do feel alone because it is such a big part of my life and who I am.
I'm fighting for the happiness our Lord shows me in my dreams. I'm fighting for the love He has blessed me with and the dreams I want to make reality.
I want to love, to give and be happy all through Jesus Christ.

 

[Evmur]

I pray that God will send you a companion .... a rare friend. God bless you.

 

[Kireina]

Hugs my dear sister thank you for sharing your story here with us ❤ I'll be praying for you May God's goodness and love follow you all the days of you life. There are young ones here on CC maybe you'll find the friends you are looking for here 😊


Welcome to CC 🤗 God bless you 🙏🏻

 

[CyKovet]

Hi there. I attempted my life in 2016 also, under much different cirumstances. Without giving too many details, I was basically backed up into a corner that I felt I couldn't get out of. I overdosed deliberabely on my own prescription meds, and tried to make it look like an accident. God kept me alive, even though 12 hours had gone by before I was found by a friend (whom I'm convinced God purposefully put in my life). He gave me a second chance, as I am sure you were given.

May He continue to bless you in your walk with Him, fellow new person here!

 

[Bingo]

"I hope you find spiritual encouragement within these pages.
Love being a splendor of joy and gladness with our Lord."

 

[fighting4happy]

Thank you so much for all your kind words! I've never felt so accepted and welcome in my life it's hard sometimes feeling so alone in faith but all your replies brought tears to me. Praying for happiness and many blessing on all of you my brothers and sisters! 🥲❤️

 

[fighting4happy]

Hi there. I attempted my life in 2016 also, under much different cirumstances. Without giving too many details, I was basically backed up into a corner that I felt I couldn't get out of. I overdosed deliberabely on my own prescription meds, and tried to make it look like an accident. God kept me alive, even though 12 hours had gone by before I was found by a friend (whom I'm convinced God purposefully put in my life). He gave me a second chance, as I am sure you were given.

May He continue to bless you in your walk with Him, fellow new person here!

I see you and your struggles. I had that feeling too He saved you for reasons one of them being replying to me to show me that I'm not alone either, if you ever want to chat I'm here even just to listen. May He continue to keep you, much love

 

[Magenta]

Welcome!

 

[TabinRivCA]

So nice to meet and how great that the Lord led you to be part of CC right now😊 Participate in the Forums and I'm sure you will make many new friends and have some good conversations. I know God loves you very much! God bless and keep you always❣

 

[KarynLouise]

Welcome! I have severe depression. I leaned on Jeremiah 29:11 for several years. I realized that thinking of taking my own life meant I wasn't trusting God's promises. I've had some recent doubts, but I'm starting to pull out of it. God miraculously saved me 20 years ago from a car accident where the doctors said i would be dead or a vegetable, so God must have a purpose for me, right? Anyhow, thank you for sharing your story. If you ever need an understanding friend, I'm here for you. God bless!

 

[fighting4happy]

Welcome! I have severe depression. I leaned on Jeremiah 29:11 for several years. I realized that thinking of taking my own life meant I wasn't trusting God's promises. I've had some recent doubts, but I'm starting to pull out of it. God miraculously saved me 20 years ago from a car accident where the doctors said i would be dead or a vegetable, so God must have a purpose for me, right? Anyhow, thank you for sharing your story. If you ever need an understanding friend, I'm here for you. God bless!

Hi! I read your thread about your struggles and you inspired me so much Jeremiah 29:11 is one of my go to's for when my own depression gets bad. I believe firmly that we are all here for His plan and it isn't lack of faith that we struggle. I can't remember which verse about the narrow path but it says the road to hell is wide and easy, however the path to light is narrow, filled with struggles but I believe God helps us stay on the right path. I often think it would be easier to give in to the hate, the despair and fury I feel. That it would be easier to just say "screw it" and let that despair eat me. Love and light is hard. My mother often says "nothing beautiful in this life is ever easy" and I think that's what God is telling us every day that we fight for everything that is good and pure. I thank you so much for your thread and message, I know the Lord is walking by your side everyday and I know He is proud of you! He's proud of every one of us that chooses the light.

 

[John_Raven]

The story about you finding that Bible was kind of like mine.

I was in such a bad moment and I had an urge to find a little plastic cross that was in my old night table drawer, it made me be in peace just for holding it, that was my revelation.

 

[fighting4happy]

The story about you finding that Bible was kind of like mine.

I was in such a bad moment and I had an urge to find a little plastic cross that was in my old night table drawer, it made me be in peace just for holding it, that was my revelation.

I will never be able to put that feeling into words. I'm pretty sure I would have ripped my whole house apart with my bare hands just to find my Bible and six years later I'm still using it everyday. God bless ❤️

 

[eXric]

My name is Caitlin and I'm 21 from the UK.
I was saved in 2016 after almost committing suicide.
I have always felt the pull of our Lord all my life but didn't want to speak out due to society's judgement. What would people I hung around with think if I told them I was religious? Would they think I was a prude or a weirdo?
I was drugged one night as a teen and I begged for death. I was in so much pain and was so scared I asked my dad to kill me as I lay in the back of a police car.
Eventually I moved on but three years later I was in college and had a breakdown. I planned to kill myself I stopped eating, showering, brushing my teeth everything until my Mum took me to the doctor and I simply said "I don't want to be here anymore." Weeks later I remembered I had an old Bible from highschool and felt a desire so strong I cannot put into words to find this Bible. Ripped my house apart looking for it and I finally did.
I confessed my sins (and trust me I did a lot of stupid things) and opened a relationship with God. It's funny now I think about it like He was waiting for me the whole time.
Now I have severe PTSD from that night and other serious traumatic events (I've been beaten, had a loaded gun to me so many near death experiences) and I haven't left my house properly in six years because of the panic attacks and triggers. There are days I ask the Lord why I'm still alive, why is there constant fear in my head but love for life and love for the Lord in my heart? With Him I don't feel like a victim I feel like light shines through out me, He makes me never want to be weak again. I pray everyday.
I've been in therapy and am currently in EDMR but I've always wanted Christian friends to pray with, to discuss the Bible and His love. The struggles I have with faith sometimes, the struggles of everyday. I never had any Christian friends and I do feel alone because it is such a big part of my life and who I am.
I'm fighting for the happiness our Lord shows me in my dreams. I'm fighting for the love He has blessed me with and the dreams I want to make reality.
I want to love, to give and be happy all through Jesus Christ.

Dang this bad stuff happened after you got saved? This verse tells about peace that transcends all understand. Sounds Like you have found some of it already. I felt lead by the Holy Spirit to tell you this, and for you to have more of this peace that transcend all understanding. Personal experience i know this to be true.
Philippians 4 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 

[Magenta]

Philippians 4:6, 7, & 19