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I no not your story, but may God Bless you with comfort and Peace among other Christian's. May God Bless you with Growth and Love here. May He Bless you to join in on some of the silly/fun threads too, so that you may find fun and Joy among those whom come here as well.
Welcome to Christian chat. See you about the threads, talk to you later than🙏🙂.
out ! 😀
Welcome to Christian chat. See you about the threads, talk to you later than🙏🙂.
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The devil on my back
The devil has been on my back for as long as I can remember. When I was a child pre-teen, I loved church, wanted to be there all the time. Even wanted to be a preacher someday. Then one day I was molested by a family friend from the church and my whole world changed.
We were young and sheltered from many things in the world, such as sexuality, drugs or anything pertaining to the real world. no tv, if there was a movie or anything at school we were made to sit in the hall. just a little overview to let you know where I am at in life.
The man that partially raised me was a preacher, doesn't matter the denomination, does it?
He was a drunk, and he liked to chase whores. He preached one thing, lived another.
At 8 years old I was molested by a family friend from the church, he would come over every sunday afternoon and have dinner with our family, this was not unusual as we had several people do this over time. My mother had a story about me when I was a baby that I believe may have caused it, people say you can't blame your parents, but I will let you decide on this one. The story goes as such, when I was a baby she would sit on my seat on the toilet and some of my parts used to hang in the water, O what a laugh everyone got from that.
So from there I was molested for two years, didn't know it was wrong, I was scared, didn't know what to do or where to turn for help. When it all came out in the open one day, I was at fault, I was told it was all my fault that it happened and I am lucky he didn't do it to my younger brother or ...
Things were not good at home, I was in trouble all the time. We were made to buy our own school clothes. We did not get an allowance, (didn't even know what one was or that kids got them for many years afterward) plus pay my mother 40% of all earnings for food, laundry, bills and such. I would mow yards and buck hay day and night to get the money I needed, always being told if you don't like the way things are around here, get your own castle and do what you want. So I did. I started leaving home at the age of 10, I don't believe they ever called the police to find me, however being young and diumb they caught me three times and took me home before I learned how to stay away from them, (always been a slow learner, but when it clicks...). I was around 14 years old when that happened. So when I left the first time at ten years old I ran into these guys that were handymen, they would fix anything from your roof to your sidewalk and everything in between. They used to like to do this stuff called crystal, and they started giving me some. I could work all day, carry a square of shingles at a time, and they loved me. (so I thought). They gave me money, a place to stay, clothes, I didn't really need much food. After a while that went south and I found myself in jail (in a detective's office, air on high and no food for 3 days until I told them who I was and where I was from) in Tennessee, that got me shipped back home on probation. That didn't last long and I was gone again, this repeated until I was fourteen.
From then on life was totally different, I associated everything bad in my life to the church. I have done about every drug known to man and maybe some not so known. I have broken every rule, commandment, law there is in the bible, (I don't think I need to go into details) I have been homeless, a drug addict, an all around everyday, all day sinner, God has always been in the back of my heart tugging, but the devil on my back had such a strong hold I couldn't break it by self. I have been in church a few times and even got baptized, but as soon as I did it was off to the races and I was gone again. Twenty years later I was digging through an old box and found a bible someone gave me a long while back and something told me to read it, when I opened it, my thumb was one 2 Timothy 2:15 Study to show thyself is what I saw, so I started reading some. I have since been going to church, the devil is still on my back and some days gnaws real hard on it, I just pray and try to get through it. Here I am fifty one years old trying again, attending a small church now, I have been a few times and am hoping to grow as it does. But until the day I die, I will be a lowly sinner in search of salvation. How many times can you ask forgiveness before it no longer works?
The devil has been on my back for as long as I can remember. When I was a child pre-teen, I loved church, wanted to be there all the time. Even wanted to be a preacher someday. Then one day I was molested by a family friend from the church and my whole world changed.
We were young and sheltered from many things in the world, such as sexuality, drugs or anything pertaining to the real world. no tv, if there was a movie or anything at school we were made to sit in the hall. just a little overview to let you know where I am at in life.
The man that partially raised me was a preacher, doesn't matter the denomination, does it?
He was a drunk, and he liked to chase whores. He preached one thing, lived another.
At 8 years old I was molested by a family friend from the church, he would come over every sunday afternoon and have dinner with our family, this was not unusual as we had several people do this over time. My mother had a story about me when I was a baby that I believe may have caused it, people say you can't blame your parents, but I will let you decide on this one. The story goes as such, when I was a baby she would sit on my seat on the toilet and some of my parts used to hang in the water, O what a laugh everyone got from that.
So from there I was molested for two years, didn't know it was wrong, I was scared, didn't know what to do or where to turn for help. When it all came out in the open one day, I was at fault, I was told it was all my fault that it happened and I am lucky he didn't do it to my younger brother or ...
Things were not good at home, I was in trouble all the time. We were made to buy our own school clothes. We did not get an allowance, (didn't even know what one was or that kids got them for many years afterward) plus pay my mother 40% of all earnings for food, laundry, bills and such. I would mow yards and buck hay day and night to get the money I needed, always being told if you don't like the way things are around here, get your own castle and do what you want. So I did. I started leaving home at the age of 10, I don't believe they ever called the police to find me, however being young and diumb they caught me three times and took me home before I learned how to stay away from them, (always been a slow learner, but when it clicks...). I was around 14 years old when that happened. So when I left the first time at ten years old I ran into these guys that were handymen, they would fix anything from your roof to your sidewalk and everything in between. They used to like to do this stuff called crystal, and they started giving me some. I could work all day, carry a square of shingles at a time, and they loved me. (so I thought). They gave me money, a place to stay, clothes, I didn't really need much food. After a while that went south and I found myself in jail (in a detective's office, air on high and no food for 3 days until I told them who I was and where I was from) in Tennessee, that got me shipped back home on probation. That didn't last long and I was gone again, this repeated until I was fourteen.
From then on life was totally different, I associated everything bad in my life to the church. I have done about every drug known to man and maybe some not so known. I have broken every rule, commandment, law there is in the bible, (I don't think I need to go into details) I have been homeless, a drug addict, an all around everyday, all day sinner, God has always been in the back of my heart tugging, but the devil on my back had such a strong hold I couldn't break it by self. I have been in church a few times and even got baptized, but as soon as I did it was off to the races and I was gone again. Twenty years later I was digging through an old box and found a bible someone gave me a long while back and something told me to read it, when I opened it, my thumb was one 2 Timothy 2:15 Study to show thyself is what I saw, so I started reading some. I have since been going to church, the devil is still on my back and some days gnaws real hard on it, I just pray and try to get through it. Here I am fifty one years old trying again, attending a small church now, I have been a few times and am hoping to grow as it does. But until the day I die, I will be a lowly sinner in search of salvation. How many times can you ask forgiveness before it no longer works?
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There simply is no limit to the number of times you can ask for and receive forgiveness. But I wonder if you have heard about being born again?
Most of us here on CC have been born again, we have asked Jesus to come into our very hearts as our Lord and Saviour.
When He comes He imparts new life to us, new strength, peace and joy which never leaves us. A clean heart.
These things can be yours right now, just ask Him.
Most of us here on CC have been born again, we have asked Jesus to come into our very hearts as our Lord and Saviour.
When He comes He imparts new life to us, new strength, peace and joy which never leaves us. A clean heart.
These things can be yours right now, just ask Him.
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All that God asks of us is that we surrender all to His lordship and do the best we can. Jesus' blood covers all our sins and gives us an eternal home in Heaven. All we need do is accept His precious Blood. Salvation is just that simple. Don't let any man convince you otherwise. Jesus has won the victory for us. Just a few more weary days and then you and I shall enter into our eternal home together.
Revelation
3:18 I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and [that] the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eyesalve, that thou mayest see.
3:19 As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.
3:20 Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
3:21 To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne.
I believe that all those who endure hardship in this life will appreciate the joy, peace, and rest of Heaven all the more. It seems to good to be true, but that's what we get for having a God that loves us so much that He gave us Son, Jesus.
Revelation
3:18 I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and [that] the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eyesalve, that thou mayest see.
3:19 As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.
3:20 Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
3:21 To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne.
I believe that all those who endure hardship in this life will appreciate the joy, peace, and rest of Heaven all the more. It seems to good to be true, but that's what we get for having a God that loves us so much that He gave us Son, Jesus.
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