I Also feel the Need to Correct Myself on this Post. It reads as if she is the only one to blame. We have both hurt each other in different ways because of our own issues. I wrote this post when I was emotionally hurt and felt like I was trying to reconcile and that she didn't care to at all. I am the type of person that almost always blames myself for everything. I apologize for everything. I am learning not to be so hard on myself and I actually start therapy this afternoon.
The Truth is that I would really feel better if I at least had a Christian Woman as a friend that I could talk to on the phone that I actually trusted for advice and support. That actually had the time to Talk and needed the support from me just as much. Maybe??? Or would I get to attached to that? I Am having trouble being alone...
Hello @seoulsearch Shall I pay the membership and give you my number???
Yes Ma'am, And Thank You for Always being so Nice to Me...Thank you so much for the offer, Michael.
I tend to keep my CC communication here on the site, and do so publicly in the threads unless I get to know someone very well, and that can take a long time.
It's been great getting to know you through your posts, and I really hope you'll keep posting.
I am happy for you. Can we say that is the closure you needed?***UPDATE***
GOD IS GOOD!!!
I saw her walking her dog this morning as we are Neighbors. And I stopped to check on her and we had a very nice conversation for a few minutes. I was able to say what I intended to say when I went over there last and it was very peaceful. She even said things to me first that I was going to say to her. We both reminded each other that we are Loved and that we are not alone because God is always with us. PRAISE JESUS...
For a minute there I thought @33Michael33 was the one who posted that about Seouls eyes, and I was like "oh wow, that man is making a MOVE!"
And I would have to second what Seoul said as well! Lovely smile miss Edith!
Okay. That's what I thought at first, and then I thought - oh no - that's 33Michael33's comment (and removed my emoji so as not to encourage it!) Now I can safety reinstate it. Thanks!
I definitely needed this. H
I Definitely needed to Say and Hear the things that were said Peacefully between us both. The Truth is that I want to go over there and Talk to Her further. But I know in my heart that is where we are different. I have recently found out about attachment styles and I believe that I am an Anxious and she is an Avoidant. So in other words, the more I try, the more she resists. It was already like that whenever we were Good. So, I will be Happy that the Lord gave me the opportunity to let Her know that She can reach out if she is willing to talk. And I will continue to Pray for her in the meantime. I Am learning to Trust God in ALL Things.
WOW, You got Excited for Seoul Snackers. Well, I am Obviously in no shape to be trying to court a Woman at all right now unfortunately. I actually offered to chat with her outside the site. However, I am glad she declined because I am not even ready for that. I actually offered to give my number to another woman on a different Christian site that I have barely chatted with and I then backed out before I even got a reply. So embarrassing, I realize that I am reaching out for support in the wrong areas to Women that are being Nice to me because that is of course, What I so desperately crave right now. These Sites are suppose to be a safe place, And I Am not trying to be that guy and will not do that again, Especially not out of my Loneliness or other issues. I will say that Seoul definitely deserves a Man that is worthy of Her. And by your reaction, I am glad that she has friends like you that get excited for her in that regard.For a minute there I thought @33Michael33 was the one who posted that about Seouls eyes, and I was like "oh wow, that man is making a MOVE!"
And I would have to second what Seoul said as well! Lovely smile miss Edith!
Thank You, Of course my recent breakup is at the forefront of my emotions because she was my only immediate support system even though it was not healthy. I felt better more than I felt alone. But in Reality, I was avoiding dealing with what I am going through now. Which is feeling like I have failed my Son. By failing in my marriage with his mother and breaking up our family. Not to even mention financially Etc. If I had of stayed focused on God and what is the most important in my Life then I would have tried harder. And now I am so ashamed and disgusted with myself that I can barely cope. And anyone that has read my posts knows the rest by now. And repeating it all at this point is starting to make me feel even worse. Prayer to God to Allow Me to Fully Trust Him in ALL Things is the Only Answer. I Am very Thankful for Your Kindness and Compassion. And Also that of others as it does Help temporarily. But I am in constant turmoil with myself and I am alone when I wake up, force myself to function and go home alone. I Know that GOD Is with Me, I Know that JESUS Is with me. I don’t feel it in the physical though. I don't have the bank account to feel OK with things in this world. All while knowing that the relationship with the only person that has been there for me in an immediate need is right down the street and we now avoid each other for different reasons because we both know that it is toxic as tempting as it is. God has shown us both what we needed to learn from Him through each other. However, It Still Hurts Beyond Measure...Hi @33Michael33,
I want to applaud your continued dedication to walking with God through a very difficult time. Most of us have been there and definitely know how it feels. I'm glad you're continuing to talk to us. I really like getting to know people through their posts.
Because of my experiences with feeling much of what you describe, I know that people in this stage (including myself) can often cling on to anyone who responds to us in a positive way -- but because of the overwhelming things we're feeling at the time, it usually doesn't go very well. For me at least, it often winds up as a pile of hurt feelings on both sides.
I definitely understand that aching need to try to connect with someone of the opposite gender while trying to get over an intense breakup.
I know online conversations don't seem like much, but I really hope you'll keep reaching out to us. We have some lighter-toned threads going on in the Family Forum (to make it more comfortable for our married friends to participate.) Maybe you'll see some things you might want to respond to there just for fun, but if not, no worries!
I just know that this is what I did when I was trying to make it through, day by day -- little interactions here and there, even if it's on a forum.
Thanks for your kind words. We really do have a good community here! I feel very honored to have made some real friends on this site, and @Snackersmom is one of the best.
I definitely needed this. H
I Definitely needed to Say and Hear the things that were said Peacefully between us both. The Truth is that I want to go over there and Talk to Her further. But I know in my heart that is where we are different. I have recently found out about attachment styles and I believe that I am an Anxious and she is an Avoidant. So in other words, the more I try, the more she resists. It was already like that whenever we were Good. So, I will be Happy that the Lord gave me the opportunity to let Her know that She can reach out if she is willing to talk. And I will continue to Pray for her in the meantime. I Am learning to Trust God in ALL Things.
Thank You for saying that. I really needed to hear it. Now I just need to tell myself that and actually believe it.
