Feel abandoned by God

[Chilidogs]

Hey, it has been a very long time since I’ve been on here.
a few months ago, my father passed. I moved in with my mother to help her but she is extremely depressed and co-defendant on everything. She asks me to do everything for her and she is always crying (I understand, but this is also burdening my well-being)
while on one hand, I love my mother, but all of this has exploded on me all at once. I have no friends, I’m holding onto my job by a thread, I’ve got bills coming up, I recently was hospitalized for a suicide attempt and it’s all because it’s just too much. Doesn’t God say he won’t give you more than you can handle? I can’t handle this. I for real want to quit life. I am so over all of this. As un-biblical as it sounds, I FEEL like God has completely abandoned me. I FEEL like I can’t resist hopelessness. I FEEL like God has pulled the rug from under me and is watching me drown. Again, these are all feelings but I need to reach out and try and talk to somebody because I’m at the end of my rope. I honestly wish I would have never been born.
somebody pray for me.

 

[Ruby123]

I pray that God will give you the strength and the peace to get through this period. May he carry you through and may you let go and allow him to take control.

I will share with you a dream I had a few months ago which may help you. I was homeless and hanging around other homeless people of varying ages from young to old. We were searching for a place to spend the night. We found this old theatre and decided it would be a good place to sleep. As I was walking through it I sensed that I had been in this place before and even knew the old man who had once lived there.

The other people whom I was with were in a line and they were walking into this water. I was last in line and I was watching them as they were before me. As they walked into this water it quickly went above their heads yet they did not seem worried. They happily entered the water. I was afraid to follow them as I said if I go into this water, it will go over my head and I will drown.

As I was thinking this I saw God in the water and he was motioning me to come in the deep water. I was very afraid and very reluctant. But he said to me "as I go into the water I will learn about the origin of the issues that I have in my life", then I woke up.

I guess God is saying to me and perhaps you, when you go into the deep water and you have lost control he is there. Dont fight it, dont resist it. Dont be afraid that you feel helpless or hopeless but allow this difficult time to do its work within you which will ultimately give you freedom like you have never had before. I hope this helps.

 

[blueskies]

somebody pray for me

You are loved.

Almighty Father, we pray for our friend right now that you will help him with the struggles he is going through in this season. For you know exactly what he needs in this moment. Draw near to them and let them feel your presence.

We pray that you provide them with comfort and guidance and a blessings of a support system in their life to let them know that they are important, and that they matter to You and the faithful so that he knows he is not alone in his struggles.

God grant this Blessing for our brother in Christ Jesus.
Amen

 

[EternalFire]

I have been through some of what you’re experiencing, and I know it’s a lot to handle.

The Psalms offer many passages that express the feelings with which you are wrestling. Try Psalm 88, for instance.

Praying for you.

 

[Magenta]

Hello Timothy. Not very long ago I saw a post of yours and was reminded of when you were here and wondered why you had left, because I thought you were such a lovely addition to our forums, and I had enjoyed my exchanges with you. You had just started your job last summer when I was talking with you after you joined. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of you beloved earthly father, and the burden this has put on you through the added responsibilities of now looking after your bereaved and grieving mother. Suicide is never a solution to learning how to live. It is no solution at all (called a permanent solution to a temporary problem by some), and I am so sorry also that this has been something you attempted. It seems so trite to say you are not alone when you feel so all alone. I was hospitalized in my youth due to self destructive behaviors that led to unintentional overdoses when I was so emotionally burdened with the circumstances of my life that I could not cope. It wasn't just that I felt I could not, I actually could not. I am so grateful that my life was not ended at that time. It has been no bed of roses since but my life has improved slowly but surely and steadily over time even as I continued in self destructive behaviors and felt lost and overburdened emotionally and unable to cope for many years following those initial hospitalizations. One thing too is that I was not saved then, but I did start an earnest search for truth following the dissolution of my marriage. I eventually got clean and sober, and miracle of miracles, finally surrendered my will and my life to God, Who I discovered I had been running from most of my life. I realize our circumstances are different but the feelings may be very similar, and I say all that just to let you know it can and it does get better. I sought help many places before and after I put down the mind and mood altering substances. I am not assuming that is an issue for you, but just saying there are many places to look for and receive ongoing support. And that it can and does get better! Please do not make another attempt on your life. Rather look for ways to improve your circumstances and barring that, to improve your ability to cope.

 

[Bingo]

"Let us pray to know God's spirit never goes away, and we must not go away from
knowing this. I pray of the Holy Spirit to be your strength, hope and courage to endure.
And I pray of peace and wellbeing to touch your life, and to know all will work out so
long as you strive to do the best you know how.
I pray God's presence allows new hope and better things to come."
'Amen'
'Praise God'

 

[Bingo]

Hello Timothy. Not very long ago I saw a post of yours and was reminded of when you were here and wondered why you had left, because I thought you were such a lovely addition to our forums, and I had enjoyed my exchanges with you. You had just started your job last summer when I was talking with you after you joined. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of you beloved earthly father, and the burden this has put on you through the added responsibilities of now looking after your bereaved and grieving mother. Suicide is never a solution to learning how to live. It is no solution at all (called a permanent solution to a temporary problem by some), and I am so sorry also that this has been something you attempted. It seems so trite to say you are not alone when you feel so all alone. I was hospitalized in my youth due to self destructive behaviors that led to unintentional overdoses when I was so emotionally burdened with the circumstances of my life that I could not cope. It wasn't just that I felt I could not, I actually could not. I am so grateful that my life was not ended at that time. It has been no bed of roses since but my life has improved slowly but surely and steadily over time even as I continued in self destructive behaviors and felt lost and overburdened emotionally and unable to cope for many years following those initial hospitalizations. One thing too is that I was not saved then, but I did start an earnest search for truth following the dissolution of my marriage. I eventually got clean and sober, and miracle of miracles, finally surrendered my will and my life to God, Who I discovered I had been running from most of my life. I realize our circumstances are different but the feelings may be very similar, and I say all that just to let you know it can and it does get better. I sought help many places before and after I put down the mind and mood altering substances. I am not assuming that is an issue for you, but just saying there are many places to look for and receive ongoing support. And that it can and does get better! Please do not make another attempt on your life. Rather look for ways to improve your circumstances and barring that, to improve your ability to cope.

"Amen"

 

[PennEd]

Hey, it has been a very long time since I’ve been on here.
a few months ago, my father passed. I moved in with my mother to help her but she is extremely depressed and co-defendant on everything. She asks me to do everything for her and she is always crying (I understand, but this is also burdening my well-being)
while on one hand, I love my mother, but all of this has exploded on me all at once. I have no friends, I’m holding onto my job by a thread, I’ve got bills coming up, I recently was hospitalized for a suicide attempt and it’s all because it’s just too much. Doesn’t God say he won’t give you more than you can handle? I can’t handle this. I for real want to quit life. I am so over all of this. As un-biblical as it sounds, I FEEL like God has completely abandoned me. I FEEL like I can’t resist hopelessness. I FEEL like God has pulled the rug from under me and is watching me drown. Again, these are all feelings but I need to reach out and try and talk to somebody because I’m at the end of my rope. I honestly wish I would have never been born.
somebody pray for me.

It is not true that God only gives us what we can handle.

We wouldn't need Him if that's what He does. But what He DOES tell us is we can trust Him that everything he does give us is for our ultimate good.

I know this doesn't help much now. But He has not abandoned you. Do you go to a Biblically sound Church? Are you involved in a small group at that Church? Are reading Scripture every day? Do you pray to Him daily?

If most of these questions are no, then you will NOT be able to Hear Him, nor get peace. Examine whether YOU have left Him.

As an exercise, I'd encourage you to sit down each day and write down at least 3 blessings that the Lord has given you.

I'll do day one for you:

1. Food EVERY day.

2. A place to live

3. A job

Tomorrow YOU list 3 others. And so on...

Holy Father, I lift up this man to You in prayer. Open His heart to the awesome plan You have for Him. Give him strength to deal with all the situations he is dealing with. Show him the utter devastation he will cause to so many, especially his mom, if he listens to the devil and takes his own life, which YOU have given him.

I pray this in Your Son's Name.

 

[Live4Him3]

I FEEL like I can’t resist hopelessness.

Hi, Timothy.

As Christians, part of our spiritual armor is "the helmet of salvation" (Eph. 6:17) or, more specifically, "an helmet, the hope of salvation " (I Thess. 5:8).

A helmet is designed to protect one's head, or, in our cases as Christians, to protect our minds.

This life can be very trying at times, and our "hope of salvation", as in that which awaits us at Christ's second coming, must sustain us during such trials.

The Apostle Peter put it this way:

I Peter chapter 1

[3] Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to his abundant mercy has begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
[4] To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fades not away, reserved in heaven for you,
[5] Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
[6] Wherein you greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, you are in heaviness through manifold temptations:
[7] That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perishes, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:
[8] Whom having not seen, you love; in whom, though now yousee him not, yet believing, you rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory:
[9] Receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls.

As a Christian, you've been "begotten again" or born again "unto a lively" or living "hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead".

There is an eternal inheritance which awaits you, but we sometimes need to endure manifold temptations or many fiery trials before we receive our eternal rewards, and we must rely on "the power of God through faith" coupled with this "lively hope" in order to make it through.

Again, it is our "helmet of salvation" or what we could rightly call "our helmet of hope" which must preserve our minds during such times or else we can easily faint in our minds and become overwhelmed with a feeling or sense of hopelessness.

The Bible tells us that, during his incarnation, Jesus "was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin" (Heb. 4:15).

It also tells us that "in that he himself has suffered being tempted, he is able to succor" or to help "them that are tempted" (Heb. 2:18).

IN FACT, what sustained Jesus throughout his own fiery trials was his own "helmet of salvation".

In relation to the same, we read:

Isaiah chapter 59

[15] Yea, truth fails; and he that departs from evil makes himself a prey: and the LORD saw it, and it displeased him that there was no judgment.
[16] And he saw that there was no man, and wondered that there was no intercessor: therefore his arm brought salvation unto him; and his righteousness, it sustained him.
[17] For he put on righteousness as a breastplate, and a helmet of salvation upon his head; and he put on the garments of vengeance for clothing, and was clad with zeal as a cloak.|

What we just read was prophetically written about Jesus Christ. in his incarnation, he needed the SAME EXACT breastplate of righteousness that we need (Eph. 6:14) to protect his heart and the SAME EXACT helmet of salvation upon his head that we need (Eph. 6:17) to protect his mind.

I trust that there are many of us here who can empathize with what you're presently going through because we've gone through similar fiery trials ourselves and made it out to the other side.

More importantly, however, Jesus Christ can AND DOES empathize with you because he's gone through similar fiery trials and made it out to the other side himself.

Timothy, we have a "high priest" who is not only "touched with the feeling of our infirmities" (Heb. 4:15) or weaknesses, but who also "ever lives to make intercession for" us (Heb. 7:25).

You've asked for prayer, and many of us will be praying for you, but know that Christ himself is praying for you as well...even as he prayed for Peter's faith not to fail him when Satan sought to sift him like wheat (Luke 22:31-32).

You're NOT alone in your struggle, Timothy.

Again, you've not only got brothers and sisters here who care about you, but you've also got the very King of kings and Lord of lords interceding before the Father on your behalf.

I hope that what I've written here brings some comfort to your soul.

You're in my prayers.

 

[SteveEpperson]

I pray this in Your Son's Name.

Amen

 

[SteveEpperson]

I trust that there are many of us here who can empathize with what you're presently going through because we've gone through similar fiery trials ourselves and made it out to the other side.

Yeah, I was getting ready to petition my own prayer request on this forum, when I ran into Chilidog's request. It makes mine look really stupid.

So, with tears in my eyes, I lift this man up to the Father, in the name of Jesus.

 

[Live4Him3]

Yeah, I was getting ready to petition my own prayer request on this forum, when I ran into Chilidog's request. It makes mine look really stupid.

So, with tears in my eyes, I lift this man up to the Father, in the name of Jesus.

No prayer request is stupid...as long as you're not asking for something amiss to consume it upon your own lusts (James 4:3).

Hopefully, you'll post your request so that others here might pray for you as well.

 

[TheIndianGirl]

You listed a few reasons for your unhappiness. What reason is troubling you MOST right now?

It seems like your mom's mood and her neediness at this moment is impacting you greatly. I would have a talk with your mom to show how her mood is impacting your mood, wellbeing, and perhaps even job performance. Try to get out of the house together and go for a walk, coffee, etc. Her sadness is not going to go away anytime soon, but getting out of the house or getting a pet (if she can handle this) can help greatly. Joining a small group or another church group for people going through loss will help greatly.

It also sounds like she is depending on you a lot. Perhaps she was very dependent on your dad? This will take time, but teach her to be more independent in baby steps. If there are financial issues, ask someone with some financial background like your mom's friend or someone who handles church finances to help you and your mom sort your finances.

Once your mom's mood improves, I believe your mood will improve also.

 

[Jocund]

A part of me still lives with a heavy heart of not being able to prevent the suicide of someone that I love. I wish you the best.

I wish it was as simple as saying a few words to wish away the pain. It isn't.

I wish it was as simple as just giving advice about finding emotional sobriety in order to think clearly. It isn't.

I wish it was as simple as invoking the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Take care of yourself. Suicide reattempts are statistically likely in the next 6-8 months following the first attempt, You can feel A-OK one day and the next be sucked back into the cycle of grief, out of control. Put as many things in play that will act as the checks and balances to prevent the opportunity for reattempt. Don't feel embarrassed. Suicidal ideation is just as serious as a drug or alcohol addiction. Carve the path. Keep moving forward. Don't get stuck in the labyrinth, just keep breaking through the walls.

 

[Chilidogs]

Wow, so much love from everybody and even old friends — thank you all so much. It is vey tough, I have what feel like wrestling matches in my head often. I’ve always struggled with renewing my mind.
Thank you all for the prayers, it means a lot to me

 

[Magenta]

Wow, so much love from everybody and even old friends — thank you all so much. It is vey tough, I have what feel like wrestling matches in my head often. I’ve always struggled with renewing my mind.
Thank you all for the prayers, it means a lot to me

1 Timothy 4:4-5 plus 1 Corinthians 10:31b

 

[Magenta]

From Ephesians 3:14-19

 

[Flowergirl19]

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
—Romans 12:10

 

[I_am_Canadian]

Hey, it has been a very long time since I’ve been on here.
a few months ago, my father passed. I moved in with my mother to help her but she is extremely depressed and co-defendant on everything. She asks me to do everything for her and she is always crying (I understand, but this is also burdening my well-being)
while on one hand, I love my mother, but all of this has exploded on me all at once. I have no friends, I’m holding onto my job by a thread, I’ve got bills coming up, I recently was hospitalized for a suicide attempt and it’s all because it’s just too much. Doesn’t God say he won’t give you more than you can handle? I can’t handle this. I for real want to quit life. I am so over all of this. As un-biblical as it sounds, I FEEL like God has completely abandoned me. I FEEL like I can’t resist hopelessness. I FEEL like God has pulled the rug from under me and is watching me drown. Again, these are all feelings but I need to reach out and try and talk to somebody because I’m at the end of my rope. I honestly wish I would have never been born.
somebody pray for me.

No it says he will never tempt you above what your able to handle.

You know maybe if it feels like he abandoned you, it's because your relationship with him is suffering, maybe you just need some time to get close to him again.

 

[SteveEpperson]

You know maybe if it feels like he abandoned you, it's because your relationship with him is suffering, maybe you just need some time to get close to him again.

I wasn't going to respond to your reply, but I really feel compelled to.

I would encourage you to go back and read the book of Job. If you recall, Job had probably the closest relationship of anyone on the planet to God, yet he suffered greatly anyway.

Also, please recall that, although everyone who knew Job was a godly man, his friends accused and convicted him of sin. Even his wife betrayed both Job and God.

So, I think that accusing our brother who created this post of not being close enough to God is a bit trite, don't you think?

Taking all that into consideration, I would not be too eager to dispense unsolicited advice.