Do men prefer women who don't chase...at all?!

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#21
#21
NoNameMcgee said:
your post seems snippy....

she is very mature

she just wanted to make sure she was ready and i am the right one

i didn't really need to chase as much as i needed to be patient


(now i would appreciate it if you drop it)
Click to expand...

... sorry if I seemed rude
but im a bit biased and i understand her first language is not english

she didn't suggest all chasing is "the chasing game"

and when she said
it wont be that easy either... thats not being immature

it is more about being a mature woman and being sure of not only what you want...

but what it is that you have in front of you

sorry if I was the snippy one
 
W

Wild

Guest
#22
#22
LadyInWaiting said:
You do realize that that's not the topic of this thread. I bounced an idea off from the show...doesn't mean I think it's all completely true. :p
The idea is...do men prefer women who make themselves available and call and text first...or do they prefer women who wait on the guy to chase them?
Click to expand...
If a girl likes me I'd like to know about it, I think it can go both ways.
 
melita916

melita916

Senior Member
#23
Aug 12, 2011
10,464
2,692
113
#23
I didn't chase my husband... although i was the one to write the first email. lol! he was the one to always ask if i was available for a phone call. texting to initiate a convo was pretty balanced between the 2 of us. i'm thinking i showed SOME kind of interest because he eventually brought up the "talk" lol. but i waited for him to bring it up.
 
A

AuntieAnt

Guest
#24
#24
My husband pursued (chased) me so relentlessly, it bordered on stalking. Though they didn't call it that back in the 70's. :unsure: Anyhow, he never gave up until I finally married him.

Myself, I'm a friendly person and find it easy to talk to people I meet, young and old. I do think sometimes people can misconstrue overt friendliness and perceive it as flirtatious. I've met folks who are lonely and so hungry for fondness, they might think you're making a play just by your saying hello to them. :oops:

 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#25
Aug 13, 2014
27,283
9,333
113
#25
Subhumanoidal said:
Your automatic assumption is that chase = game, but that's not always the case.
But since the thread is on women pursuing men, and men are less likely to play hard to get, it's not wholly relevant.
And, if as NoName suggests and he had to pursue you would that mean you were playing a game? That you aren't mature? Because that is the claim you made.
Click to expand...
No that is not the claim she made. Man, you pounce on anything you can nit-pick like... like a lynx on a rabbit hole!
 
Precious_Jules

Precious_Jules

New member
#26
Mar 14, 2019
2
1
1
#26
NoNameMcgee said:
Well said... by the beautiful woman who turned me down twice before we got together....;):sneaky:



(as for me... I pretty much agree with SMD, a little chasing is fine for the right person but as adults we should know what we want....)
Click to expand...
That's super sweet. Are you guys married or planning to get married? And did you meet on Christian Chat? Interesting fact.
Or maybe that is an abrupt conclusion.
 
ChandlerFan

ChandlerFan

Senior Member
#27
Jan 8, 2013
1,148
102
63
#27
This may or may not be a character flaw, but personally there is something that turns me off about a woman making the first move. I don't think it's a pride thing? But it's just the way that I tend to feel or react. What I do know is that men like to feel like men, and one of the ways that can happen is for them to be the one who pursues, at least for those who have the...fortitude to pursue a woman they find attractive.

As for that Bachelor scenario, assuming it wasn't scripted, it is no surprise at all that the guy went after the one woman who actually required pursuing.
 
melita916

melita916

Senior Member
#29
Aug 12, 2011
10,464
2,692
113
#29
I pursued a guy once, letting him know through a friend that I liked him. He didn’t like me back.

The end.

Lol.
 
Deade

Deade

Called of God
#30
Dec 17, 2017
16,724
10,531
113
78
Vinita, Oklahoma, USA
yeshuaofisrael.org
#30
ChandlerFan said:
This may or may not be a character flaw, but personally there is something that turns me off about a woman making the first move. I don't think it's a pride thing? But it's just the way that I tend to feel or react. What I do know is that men like to feel like men, and one of the ways that can happen is for them to be the one who pursues, at least for those who have the...fortitude to pursue a woman they find attractive.

As for that Bachelor scenario, assuming it wasn't scripted, it is no surprise at all that the guy went after the one woman who actually required pursuing.
Click to expand...
Would you be turned off by a smile or a sly glance? How would you know if she were interested in you without something from her, up front? I was fortunate when I was dating. We had a lot of young folks that roller skated and partied together. I knew most of them from 14 years old on.

I was a good looking young man and I landed a very good union job at a young age. I was fully capable of caring for a wife with my job and benefits. Point being: I was bait for marriage. That is also what I wanted. While I was dating one girl, another would smile or give some body language that she was available and interested. When I broke up with one, there was another already handy. :)(y):cool:
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#31
May 23, 2009
16,441
5,389
113
#31
Deade said:
Would you be turned off by a smile or a sly glance? How would you know if she were interested in you without something from her, up front? I was fortunate when I was dating. We had a lot of young folks that roller skated and partied together. I knew most of them from 14 years old on.

I was a good looking young man and I landed a very good union job at a young age. I was fully capable of caring for a wife with my job and benefits. Point being: I was bait for marriage. That is also what I wanted. While I was dating one girl, another would smile or give some body language that she was available and interested. When I broke up with one, there was another already handy. :)(y):cool:
Click to expand...

Hi Deade,

You know I hold the highest respect for you, but I have to admit that I've always been curious as to what things are like for "the beautiful people."

I have always ran from guys who had women lined up (not because they were ever after me, but because, if I had a crush on them, I would quickly squelch it, knowing that even if I could land a guy like that, I was easily dispensable and replaceable.)

* Did having lots of women after you make it tough to settle down with just one woman?

* What happened after the things that attracted those women were no longer there?

* Was it a tough adjustment to your self-identity, and how did you cope?

Or... maybe you still have women lined up today. :D Sorry, my apologies if any or all of these questions are moot. :)
 
Subhumanoidal

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
#32
Sep 17, 2018
4,058
3,172
113
#32
NoNameMcgee said:
your post seems snippy....

she is very mature

she just wanted to make sure she was ready and i am the right one

i didn't really need to chase as much as i needed to be patient


(now i would appreciate it if you drop it)
Click to expand...
I don't recall asking you. She made statements and I asked valid questions. If you can't handle such a minor thing then you're going to be upset an awful lot with people.
But I suppose since you shut her down and spoke for her, rather than trusting her to be able to speak for herself I should refer all comments to you? That way you can be in control of her?

And you called my comment snippy and I should drop it. Look in the mirror boy.
 
W

Wild

Guest
#33
#33
The passive aggressiveness in this thread is laughable. Thanks for the laughs guys :)
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#34
#34
Subhumanoidal said:
I don't recall asking you. She made statements and I asked valid questions. If you can't handle such a minor thing then you're going to be upset an awful lot with people.
But I suppose since you shut her down and spoke for her, rather than trusting her to be able to speak for herself I should refer all comments to you? That way you can be in control of her?

And you called my comment snippy and I should drop it. Look in the mirror boy.
Click to expand...
You for some strange reason tried to make a hypocrit out of someone I care about deeply and hope to marry one day when you misunderstood her words... but ya
I was snippy
and I am sorry for that
but I am not sorry for speaking up ...

I am in control of no one
including you...

Though if you don't mind I'd prefer to take this to private messages unless your goal is to bicker in front of everyone.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#35
Aug 13, 2014
27,283
9,333
113
#35
Subhumanoidal said:
I don't recall asking you. She made statements and I asked valid questions. If you can't handle such a minor thing then you're going to be upset an awful lot with people.
But I suppose since you shut her down and spoke for her, rather than trusting her to be able to speak for herself I should refer all comments to you? That way you can be in control of her?

And you called my comment snippy and I should drop it. Look in the mirror boy.
Click to expand...
What an ugly thing to say...

Why do you call him boy? From what I have observed of many species - humans, dogs, cats and others - it is the young who fly off the handle and act the fool. The older a member of the species becomes, the more laid back he becomes. Elders of most species I've observed are much calmer and tolerate the tomfoolery of the young.

In this case Subhumanoidal you seem much younger than NoNameMcGee.
 
1christian1

1christian1

Banned
#36
Sep 13, 2018
2,587
885
113
#36
Subhumanoidal said:
We see threads like this pretty often. The short answer, as always when asking about a bulk of people, is 'it depends'. There is no yes or no answer, because people vary. Some men hate it, period. Others don't care. Some (men and women) think it's un-Christian for a woman to pursue, or even speak up at all, others (men and women) disagree.
So it depends on the man. But, i always say, do what you believe. If you like a guy and feel it's acceptable to speak up, then do so. If he doesn't like it, find someone who is ok with it. If you dislike it, as a woman, then don't do it.
I have, many times, been on the receiving end of women that spoke up, and it's never bothered me. The only time it bothers me is when i make a refusal very clear and it is not accepted (it hasn't happened a lot, but it's happened).

"the more love you show a man, the more disrespect you receive from him", as a man, sounds ludicrous to me and far from true.
Click to expand...
Tell the truth. this has Never happened to you. or you would not be here.. LOL...
 
1christian1

1christian1

Banned
#37
Sep 13, 2018
2,587
885
113
#37
NoNameMcgee said:
You for some strange reason tried to make a hypocrit out of someone I care about deeply and hope to marry one day when you misunderstood her words... but ya
I was snippy
and I am sorry for that
but I am not sorry for speaking up ...

I am in control of no one
including you...

Though if you don't mind I'd prefer to take this to private messages unless your goal is to bicker in front of everyone.
Click to expand...
WOW! now this site is entertaining. Never expected this... LOL... Remember ,we are all Christians...
 
Subhumanoidal

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
#38
Sep 17, 2018
4,058
3,172
113
#38
NoNameMcgee said:
You for some strange reason tried to make a hypocrit out of someone I care about deeply and hope to marry one day when you misunderstood her words... but ya
I was snippy
and I am sorry for that
but I am not sorry for speaking up ...

I am in control of no one
including you...

Though if you don't mind I'd prefer to take this to private messages unless your goal is to bicker in front of everyone.
Click to expand...
I did not try to make a hypocrite out of anyone. She made contradicting statements and I questioned her about them. And you tried to be all macho and talk crap and stick your nose in it and turn it into something it wasn't and boss me around. If you'd have let her speak for herself it could have been cleared up without Your involvement and none of this would have happened.
Worry not about further bickering. I'm done with you. Period.
 
G

Gracie_14

Guest
#39
#39
Subhumanoidal said:
I did not try to make a hypocrite out of anyone. She made contradicting statements and I questioned her about them. And you tried to be all macho and talk crap and stick your nose in it and turn it into something it wasn't and boss me around. If you'd have let her speak for herself it could have been cleared up without Your involvement and none of this would have happened.
Worry not about further bickering. I'm done with you. Period.
Click to expand...
Sir...Have you read everything you have just posted here? Like, everything? I think you should treat NonNameMccee with some respect and not judge someone out of the blue like that.

Have a good day.

PS: I think you have totally ignored his apology stating he was sorry if he appeared ruse. But, it seems you have completely ignored that...

Anyway, why do I bother?

Again, have a good day.
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#40
May 23, 2009
16,441
5,389
113
#40
I consider Sweetmorning Dew and NoNameMcGee to both be good friends, and wonderful people for anyone who takes the time to get to know them.

NoName and I have gone a couple of rounds, lol... Mostly because I was angry at God about this or that in my life at the time so it was all on me, but he doesn't give up on people that easily. If there's one thing I know about him, it's that he doesn't give up on people, and, even if he disagrees with something that's said, he still prays for that person.

I wish him and Sweetmorning Dew the very best.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.