Do men love?
- Thread starter Edith
- Start date
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hardwork? hhhhmmmmmm. i believe a relationship, at times, may require hardwork, but not constantly. that would be serious trouble.Laughing hard. what is mushy gushy? I meant Acttions accompanying words. I have come to notice that relationships takes a lot of hardwork. It is this hard work I don't see.
yeah, but my wife always says.... & then she will constantly do...... but wait a minute, you should see when she goes to the....... day & night, she'll...... you talk about being guilty & a double standard....... & i can never get her to.......hey, you think we should renew our vows?????? nyuknyuknyuk!
I think I cannot keep up with you. You seem to mean something different every time you restate what you mean.Laughing hard. what is mushy gushy
This time it looks like you mean "Are men too lazy to put in the work that a relationship requires?" Is that what you are saying?
you may not know but Edith is from Cameroon. she may not speak in the same manner or context as we do.
I didn't say she is crazy. I'm just saying I am struggling to comprehend what she means here.
Bluntly, I don't get it.
Oh dear sorry you are not the first. I don't express my self well enough. however. it is a bit of all, lack of mushy gushy thing, lack of action, I mean Love in all it's dimension.
Please bare with a sister. I am a fast leaner. I know one slang already "Basket case"
Yeah I read statements 3 or 4 times before getting the sense and it's ok I am learning
Yes for sure. Then the question may be, submission and love what is the difference?
U have inspired me to ask the question , what does love mean to us on a personal level . Yes I know, it's hard to put into words
, it's just that my feelings about love r different to yours so , I thought that maybe everyone's feelings about love could b very different . I don't want to feel as if I belong . I have never ever felt like that except with God . He is my family , my home . A person can't make me feel like that . Trying to keep this short as possible : love is an emotion and it's also irrational and a law unto itself . Love isn't about looks , it's about attraction but not just on a physical level . For me , I know when I love someone when , their happiness is much more important to me than my own is , in other words I'm prepared to sacrifice my own happiness in order for them to b happy and their happiness makes me feel happy .
Doing something nice for someone is one of the ways that we can express our love for them but it isn't love in and of itself . I would 'love'
to know everyone else's definition of love . Looking forward to reading everyone's answers 
.
I like what Kahlil Gibran said on love, which had a profound effect on me as a teen when I first
read it, to realize there were such people in the world, to think so deeply on these matters...
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself
He threshes you to make your naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God’s sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart,
and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life’s heart.
But if in your heart you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, “God is in my heart,” but rather, “I am in the heart of God.”
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
From The Prophet (Knopf, 1923). This poem is in the public domain.
read it, to realize there were such people in the world, to think so deeply on these matters...
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.
Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself
He threshes you to make your naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God’s sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart,
and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life’s heart.
But if in your heart you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, “God is in my heart,” but rather, “I am in the heart of God.”
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
From The Prophet (Knopf, 1923). This poem is in the public domain.
Here is a poem I wrote on love:
I tried to shield this heart from love
To spare myself the pain
Forlorn indeed I fell
And this endeavor wrought my shame
Because I could not face the depth
Of feelings you inspired
I ran away
How could I know
I'd burn in hell's vile fire?
I tried to pick the pieces up
. Abysmal
. . . Broken
. .. . . Charred
A semblance of normality
I worked for very hard
Thusly mired I struggled
Both to end and attain flight
Striving to excise the wound
And cease my despaired plight
But always irrevocably
Your image came to bear
My being strained to fill the void
With love I could not share
Ever present buried deep
Within my tortured soul
My love lay pining hidden from
A world which seemed so cold
How could I have so erred in life
To plainly lose my way
Ignoring my emotive will
Keeping my self at bay
By thinking I'd be happy
In fulfilling others' hearts
Relentless death crept on me
And eclipsed my vital spark
Written by Magenta in 1988
I tried to shield this heart from love
To spare myself the pain
Forlorn indeed I fell
And this endeavor wrought my shame
Because I could not face the depth
Of feelings you inspired
I ran away
How could I know
I'd burn in hell's vile fire?
I tried to pick the pieces up
. Abysmal
. . . Broken
. .. . . Charred
A semblance of normality
I worked for very hard
Thusly mired I struggled
Both to end and attain flight
Striving to excise the wound
And cease my despaired plight
But always irrevocably
Your image came to bear
My being strained to fill the void
With love I could not share
Ever present buried deep
Within my tortured soul
My love lay pining hidden from
A world which seemed so cold
How could I have so erred in life
To plainly lose my way
Ignoring my emotive will
Keeping my self at bay
By thinking I'd be happy
In fulfilling others' hearts
Relentless death crept on me
And eclipsed my vital spark
Written by Magenta in 1988
I think I understand what u mean but please correct me if I have misunderstood u . To me , in my experience love is not a choice . It's not something that I am in control of . It smacks u in the face , grips your innards and says ' I've got u now ! ' , if that sounds scary...it is ! Going out of your way to do nice things for someone is of course , very nice and kind BUT , I am very capable of doing the nice kind thing to / for someone that I don't actually love . I just asked Edith in my reply to her , what does love mean to u ? I think maybe it means different things to different people and that's ok . I am interested to hear everyone's answer to that question . Love doesn't come naturally or easy to me so when it does , I really know that it has got me cos it hasn't happened many times .
My hubby is away visiting some of his family , he just sent me this poem by Philip Larkin . He must b missing me cos he's not usually this romantic
.