Devastated

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Willow

Well-known member
Oct 10, 2021
435
405
63
ohio
#1
I was getting ready to make a trip to a close friend her husband had passed away. They are like adopted parents to me. Well she let her granddaughter take care of letting people know about the funeral and things. I had talked to her granddaughter once she was very rude to me on the phone. Long story short I was never told about any of it. It was yesterday and I just found out about it today. I am so hurt I feel crushed.
I think they thought I wanted money or something the family is money hungry. I just wanted to pay my last respects and comfort my friends :( .
I have PTSD from years back from missing my mom's funeral . I had been held captive by an ex with a gun. I am so weary of the worlds ugliness. I at least got to send her a memory blanket. But still :cry:
 

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Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,754
4,119
113
63
#2
I was getting ready to make a trip to a close friend her husband had passed away. They are like adopted parents to me. Well she let her granddaughter take care of letting people know about the funeral and things. I had talked to her granddaughter once she was very rude to me on the phone. Long story short I was never told about any of it. It was yesterday and I just found out about it today. I am so hurt I feel crushed.
I think they thought I wanted money or something the family is money hungry. I just wanted to pay my last respects and comfort my friends :( .
I have PTSD from years back from missing my mom's funeral . I had been held captive by an ex with a gun. I am so weary of the worlds ugliness. I at least got to send her a memory blanket. But still :cry:
God sees your beautiful thought through the blanket...
It does not matter what people think , it is what God thinks of us that is important :)
Who knows but God , that someone may look at your beautiful blanket and ask " WOW , who made this , it is lovely "
...xox...
 

Snacks

Well-known member
Feb 10, 2022
1,410
771
113
#3
God knows, your friend knows and you know the love you have for your friend who passed away. May you find comfort in their love for you and may you find comfort in your friendship here.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#4
wait what

where did the gun come from

Your mum died, how...
sometimes we cant make funerals for whatever reason. But we do need to say goodbye in our own way if thats what you need to do.

If you cant be there in person send a thought, card, flowers, or do something special in that persons memory, like plant a tree. I have planted many trees. Or if we are the keeper of the memory, write that person story or a poem...they want to be rememebered for how they lived not how they died.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#5
People that grieving often appreciate a thought or comfort AFTER the funeral, in the weeks and months ahead.
I think for a lot of people the funeral isnt actually the final say. Some people also get buried a lot later, but if they are buried, then the graveyard or tombsite is a place you can always go to afterwards. I dont think anyone can stop you going there unless you have no idea where that person is buried.

If thats the case just remember them by their favourite things. eg if that person liked golf, have a golf tournament...or they liked...lasagna, cook a load of lasagnas and give them to the homeless or something like that.
 

timf

New member
Jul 7, 2022
19
14
3
#6
You can reach out individually to those who you know would appreciate it.

Being excluded from the company of people who are not nice is not all bad.