First time I've posted in this section.
I have been a Christian for about a year.
Late twenties and single.
Consequently sex before marriage was never something that effected me.
There are a few things that concern me about dating a Christian:
1. Sex before marriage, partly because I'm not sure I want to get married in the modern sense
2. The idea of not being able to live together until after marriage
3. If I had Children with a Christian, I'd like to bring them up around certain values but I'd like them to be given the chance to make up their own mind without being force fed Church dogma in Church children groups from a young age.
This is influenced by the fact that I came to God through my own free will and was not through being influenced by family (not Christians) or anything else.
Thoughts?
"1. Sex before marriage, partly because I'm not sure I want to get married in the modern sense"
"Modern sense"??? It sounds like you have not finished the process of being born again through complete regeneration of the soul by the Holy Spirit. When I was born again, the Holy Spirit guided me very gradually and patiently towards abandoning everything in life that does not come from true Christian people (men and women of God). As such, I am now truly born again, and find the "modern world" not so modern at all, yet just a rehashing of what sinful people have done through out all the ages.
Anyways, also, my heart opened up to the idea of true love from God, which is pure, and trumps any love expressed by people who don't follow God as their love is tainted with lust, greed, pride, envy, and other ugly sins. Born Again Christians have pure hearts since they've completed the effort of repenting for every sin they've committed in their life, and continue to repent whenever they commit wrong.
So, yes people must abstain from sex until marriage to serve God.
"2. The idea of not being able to live together until after marriage"
Again, a Born Again Christian does not behave like Pagans who live like mindless animals. They marry and then move in together.
"3. If I had Children with a Christian, I'd like to bring them up around certain values but I'd like them to be given the chance to make up their own mind without being force fed Church dogma in Church children groups from a young age.
This is influenced by the fact that I came to God through my own free will and was not through being influenced by family (not Christians) or anything else."
This demonstrates severe lack of understanding due to being blinded by Satan.
Influences can be good influences and bad influences depending on the people and intentions.
Yes, it is our job as Christians to influence our sons and daughters in good ways, including raising them in the word of the Lord.
Of course, evil people (who reject God) always see good influences as undesirable, and good people (who fully accept the Lord) always see good influences as highly desirable. I must admit I was a victim of this early in life. Thanks be to God, I was rescued by the Holy Spirit, Jesus Christ, and the blessings of the Lord our Father in Heaven. I see the light of God now and avoid the rebellious nature of Satan.
Raising your kids in the faith is akin of keeping them on the right path in a mountain hike lest they fall off a cliff. Only a fool would give them freedom to dabble in the Satanic. You must do it even if it feels unpleasant to them. This happens for a while and then Satan is defeated from them, and suddenly raising them in the faith feels very pleasant to them and they thank God and you for it.
Godspeed.