No idea or effort?

I seem to have no idea that is desirous enough to perform that is not me doing it for the sake of it in a disheartening way of futile purposelessness. And I stay in bed all morning doing nothing, not even moving, thinking, "what's the point of getting up, I have nothing to do or live for and am blocked by God from doing any selfish hobbies or interests or gaming". So I ask for prayer on a solution and help to "do something" because it is depressing especially in winter where I miss all the daylight. There is no fun, joy, peace, help or future. What can I do if God does not give it to me as a work that is fulling to do, with meaning and not "for the sake of it"? Selfishness and lazyness seems to become deeper, and now bitterness and greed. It seems hopeless. I ask someone to pray for me. I know even this is selfish, as my prayer life is terribly repetitive.

I miss the old days. When I actually did something like college for a "potential hopeful purpose", but those things are gone and meaningless. Where did they end up. You see my problem. I have no hopes, no dreams, and heaven seems to be visualised as a "bunch of male and female monks not doing much". I do not see the "joy" in that, only "contentment to be content with little or nothing" like a "sheep". We see Jesus, but so did the apostles. What does that mean? We get new bodies, but to do what? I don't know. I wish I was more like "those happy christians" but I was raised expecting to "go and do something" in the "future". Now all that is gone, what is left? I pray for this to be solved in Jesus name Amen.

Ask God to establish the desires of your heart according to His will. Be prepared to act on your desires. You are suffering from passivity, which is a kind of spiritual prison. You have the key, however. It is your will. The antidote to passivity is to do something. Anything for a start will do. Go for a walk, do a jigsaw puzzle, take up a craft. Even sheep do something to stay alive. They go looking for grass.

God is not against hobbies or even games. Some games are harmless. God is not the spoilsport that many imagine that He is. I've been through this after my marriage broke up. What saved me was my job. I hated weekends. A friend saw what was happening and gave me the advice I'm giving you. I started new garden beds and planted roses and such. I was renting so it seemed pointless. However, it got me moving. I was on a ship for 3-1/2 years. It may seem obvious, but one thing I noticed was that you cannot steer a ship while it is not moving. Once it is underway, you can change direction if necessary.

You've been praying. That's good. I believe what I've said is the answer to your prayers.

#ICAMETOSHARE

"I can only pray that you confront the real reasoning that has brought about this
dilemma. And to know hiding under the guise of self pity being a self inflicted misery,
and will likely only deepen your despair."

'I pray you hear these words... not meant to be harsh but with brotherly love and
hope you come to learn what is needed in your life.'
'Amen'

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I seem to have no idea that is desirous enough to perform that is not me doing it for the sake of it in a disheartening way of futile purposelessness. And I stay in bed all morning doing nothing, not even moving, thinking, "what's the point of getting up, I have nothing to do or live for and am blocked by God from doing any selfish hobbies or interests or gaming". So I ask for prayer on a solution and help to "do something" because it is depressing especially in winter where I miss all the daylight. There is no fun, joy, peace, help or future. What can I do if God does not give it to me as a work that is fulling to do, with meaning and not "for the sake of it"? Selfishness and lazyness seems to become deeper, and now bitterness and greed. It seems hopeless. I ask someone to pray for me. I know even this is selfish, as my prayer life is terribly repetitive.

I miss the old days. When I actually did something like college for a "potential hopeful purpose", but those things are gone and meaningless. Where did they end up. You see my problem. I have no hopes, no dreams, and heaven seems to be visualised as a "bunch of male and female monks not doing much". I do not see the "joy" in that, only "contentment to be content with little or nothing" like a "sheep". We see Jesus, but so did the apostles. What does that mean? We get new bodies, but to do what? I don't know. I wish I was more like "those happy christians" but I was raised expecting to "go and do something" in the "future". Now all that is gone, what is left? I pray for this to be solved in Jesus name Amen.

God is against games and my hobbies, because when I go to buy a game and the one next to it says "REPENT II", or I only look at a game in interest that I will not get, in the listings it said, " Includes the soundtrack "Road To Gehenna", it's kind of obvious God does not want "gaming", one because it is addictive, or at least eats up time, even if they are free. Even if they are only driving games or non-violent. Hobbies go no-where because I wanted to do web-design/programming/blender-3d modelling/animation but God eventually stopped it as it was obviously a waste of time. I had no job or permitted angle for it unless I made a "game or seemingly non-christian" peaceful/loving thing, that seems impossible due to the time it takes. Most likely away from God, although I do not read the bible much in this depressed aimless state, even evangelism was "blocked" as if I am not "the right type of person" or it would be a waste of time or something.