Reading through many of the posts, a couple of things seems obvious to me:
1. There is way more going on here than can be helped to any real degree on this thread. There are some deep-seated problems and professional help is necessary unless God does a miracle. A Christian counselor familiar with these issues would be most helpful.
2. Oftentimes, situations are made worse, not better, by well-intentioned people. Certainly a combination of love and truth are necessary for healing, but the misapplication of the two can easily exacerbate the problem. Discernment is necessary to know which and in what order and degree they should be applied.
Having shared this, it's ok to just say...I'm praying for you...to an individual. And if you aren't sure whether to make use of love or truth, the one that never fails is love.