I wish I wouldn't fail

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Drewandbob12

Guest
#1
#1
I wish I wouldn't fail to be perfect and that I could undo many of the things I've done in my life. I truly hate that.

You might be wondering what now? What's going on this time with this person and I suppose I do no good but keeping it to myself so I'll explain.

When you get lonely you get very much desperate, and even I can't deny that. I have yet to master myself out of loneliness and that's actually part of the reason I came here more recently again. I want to change for the better of myself and for God.... but at the same time I am a fool. I have been trying to get a girlfriend for the longest of time because well I want that family, that happiness that love.... but I hate waiting and I think that these dating sites have taken my soul because the dopamine they produce is overwhelming.

Anyway I say I am a fool because a girl came along and well loneliness... she asked for some money I gave her some money and I gave it to her, not at first but after a while I would give in. We were planning on meeting because I wanted to hangout, which is code for I actually wanted sex but didn't want to say it out loud, and she is what I would call a Escort. Well I am truly a fool.

I didn't me her as I actually just blocked her finally because something in me told myself to run. "Run far away, keep running please, don't do this, you're better than this" and the bible quote that popped in my head "Flee from Sexually immorality". I just couldn't do it.

Personally right now I feel like I deserve the bottom of Hell, and should be executed for my evil. I just want to be free from my sin, but it always feels like a losing war. Sin pushed up from behind with a counterattack and I'm caught off guard on the battlefield. I share this with you today in hopes that I myself find peace in this and that others who relate or don't and could see that this is indeed a dangerous path.... but I am just like every other person and I fall into my sin.... but I want to be better than that... I don't want to lose, I refuse.. Jesus didn't give up so why should I? Even if I am not him, I just want to be free, to be saved... I don't want to use Jesus as an excuse to sin. That's weakness in my eyes, I don't think Jesus died so that you could Sin, and even now I tell myself that, but I am still just another sinner regardless of that.

and I wish I wouldn't fail....
 
Roughsoul1991

Roughsoul1991

Senior Member
#2
Sep 17, 2016
8,846
4,503
113
#2
Drewandbob12 said:
I wish I wouldn't fail to be perfect and that I could undo many of the things I've done in my life. I truly hate that.

You might be wondering what now? What's going on this time with this person and I suppose I do no good but keeping it to myself so I'll explain.

When you get lonely you get very much desperate, and even I can't deny that. I have yet to master myself out of loneliness and that's actually part of the reason I came here more recently again. I want to change for the better of myself and for God.... but at the same time I am a fool. I have been trying to get a girlfriend for the longest of time because well I want that family, that happiness that love.... but I hate waiting and I think that these dating sites have taken my soul because the dopamine they produce is overwhelming.

Anyway I say I am a fool because a girl came along and well loneliness... she asked for some money I gave her some money and I gave it to her, not at first but after a while I would give in. We were planning on meeting because I wanted to hangout, which is code for I actually wanted sex but didn't want to say it out loud, and she is what I would call a Escort. Well I am truly a fool.

I didn't me her as I actually just blocked her finally because something in me told myself to run. "Run far away, keep running please, don't do this, you're better than this" and the bible quote that popped in my head "Flee from Sexually immorality". I just couldn't do it.

Personally right now I feel like I deserve the bottom of Hell, and should be executed for my evil. I just want to be free from my sin, but it always feels like a losing war. Sin pushed up from behind with a counterattack and I'm caught off guard on the battlefield. I share this with you today in hopes that I myself find peace in this and that others who relate or don't and could see that this is indeed a dangerous path.... but I am just like every other person and I fall into my sin.... but I want to be better than that... I don't want to lose, I refuse.. Jesus didn't give up so why should I? Even if I am not him, I just want to be free, to be saved... I don't want to use Jesus as an excuse to sin. That's weakness in my eyes, I don't think Jesus died so that you could Sin, and even now I tell myself that, but I am still just another sinner regardless of that.

and I wish I wouldn't fail....
Click to expand...
The story of a honest Christian. We all have our weaknesses where we fall into sin or give into rebellion. The Christian walk is a walk straight and narrow but many paths try to take you away. A true Christian may stumble or stray away but they will revert or repent back to the straight and narrow path. Our imperfections sow humbleness and our weakness kills pride. It only shows is how badly we need our focus to stay on Jesus. From morning until we close our eyes we need our focus on Jesus just like a warrior who has enemies on all sides. He must stay focused or the enemy will strike at any hint of weakness.
 
G

Gideon300

Well-known member
#3
Mar 18, 2021
5,300
3,129
113
#3
Drewandbob12 said:
I wish I wouldn't fail to be perfect and that I could undo many of the things I've done in my life. I truly hate that.

You might be wondering what now? What's going on this time with this person and I suppose I do no good but keeping it to myself so I'll explain.

When you get lonely you get very much desperate, and even I can't deny that. I have yet to master myself out of loneliness and that's actually part of the reason I came here more recently again. I want to change for the better of myself and for God.... but at the same time I am a fool. I have been trying to get a girlfriend for the longest of time because well I want that family, that happiness that love.... but I hate waiting and I think that these dating sites have taken my soul because the dopamine they produce is overwhelming.

Anyway I say I am a fool because a girl came along and well loneliness... she asked for some money I gave her some money and I gave it to her, not at first but after a while I would give in. We were planning on meeting because I wanted to hangout, which is code for I actually wanted sex but didn't want to say it out loud, and she is what I would call a Escort. Well I am truly a fool.

I didn't me her as I actually just blocked her finally because something in me told myself to run. "Run far away, keep running please, don't do this, you're better than this" and the bible quote that popped in my head "Flee from Sexually immorality". I just couldn't do it.

Personally right now I feel like I deserve the bottom of Hell, and should be executed for my evil. I just want to be free from my sin, but it always feels like a losing war. Sin pushed up from behind with a counterattack and I'm caught off guard on the battlefield. I share this with you today in hopes that I myself find peace in this and that others who relate or don't and could see that this is indeed a dangerous path.... but I am just like every other person and I fall into my sin.... but I want to be better than that... I don't want to lose, I refuse.. Jesus didn't give up so why should I? Even if I am not him, I just want to be free, to be saved... I don't want to use Jesus as an excuse to sin. That's weakness in my eyes, I don't think Jesus died so that you could Sin, and even now I tell myself that, but I am still just another sinner regardless of that.

and I wish I wouldn't fail....
Click to expand...
Failure is a good thing, if you view it correctly. The vast majority of people have a false view of themselves and high expectations that are unrealistic. We know that sin is wrong, so we try hard not to, then punish ourselves if and when we sin. We end up like Paul in Romans 7.

The answer is to give up trying. We should no more be surprised when we sin than when a dog steals food that's left in its reach. We need to judge ourselves as God does: completely useless and helpless in spiritual things. Jesus said that He came that we might have life. Most people think that means we go to heaven when we die. No, it means that Lord Jesus Himself lives within us, to be both the motivation and the empowering that we need to live in a way that pleases God.

Galatians 2:20 means exactly what it says. The "I" that I was born as no longer lives. How? Because God included us in the death of Christ. But that's not all. It is "Christ that lives in me". How? Because God includes us in the resurrection of Christ. Spiritually, we are already in heaven because Lord Jesus has ascended. We rule and reign in life because Lord Jesus was glorified.

What do we have to do to obtain all this? Nothing. It's God's gift to us in Christ. As in the garden of Eden, we have a choice. We can live by our own efforts, typified by the tree of the knowledge of Good and Evil or we can live by the life of the Lord Jesus, typified by the Tree of Life. The former is failure. defeat and sin. The latter is victory, overcoming, peace and joy. I've done it both ways. Knowing Jesus as my life is the greatest revelation I've had since I was born again.

You will still sin and fail from time to time, but the blood of Lord Jesus removes it as if it never happened. You will make progress and you will not notice. Others will. I met my ex wife after not seeing her for 15 years. She remarked to a mutual acquaintance that I was much more peaceful. No, it was not because of the divorce!

Seek the Lord about these things. He loves to bring people into the victory in experience.
 
EmilyNats

EmilyNats

Senior Member
#4
Jul 28, 2016
1,374
205
63
#4
We have all failed, and we all truthfully deserve the depths of hell. I just thank Jesus that He made a way out for us! I applaud you for having the strength to block the woman, that's a difficult thing.

Are you currently active in a church? I know for me it helped so much to have a group of relatable believers around me to keep my mind from temptations.
 
Lily-Keith

Lily-Keith

Active member
#5
Jun 11, 2021
136
101
43
lilliankeithauthor.wordpress.com
#5
Drewandbob12 said:
I wish I wouldn't fail to be perfect and that I could undo many of the things I've done in my life. I truly hate that.

You might be wondering what now? What's going on this time with this person and I suppose I do no good but keeping it to myself so I'll explain.

When you get lonely you get very much desperate, and even I can't deny that. I have yet to master myself out of loneliness and that's actually part of the reason I came here more recently again. I want to change for the better of myself and for God.... but at the same time I am a fool. I have been trying to get a girlfriend for the longest of time because well I want that family, that happiness that love.... but I hate waiting and I think that these dating sites have taken my soul because the dopamine they produce is overwhelming.

Anyway I say I am a fool because a girl came along and well loneliness... she asked for some money I gave her some money and I gave it to her, not at first but after a while I would give in. We were planning on meeting because I wanted to hangout, which is code for I actually wanted sex but didn't want to say it out loud, and she is what I would call a Escort. Well I am truly a fool.

I didn't me her as I actually just blocked her finally because something in me told myself to run. "Run far away, keep running please, don't do this, you're better than this" and the bible quote that popped in my head "Flee from Sexually immorality". I just couldn't do it.

Personally right now I feel like I deserve the bottom of Hell, and should be executed for my evil. I just want to be free from my sin, but it always feels like a losing war. Sin pushed up from behind with a counterattack and I'm caught off guard on the battlefield. I share this with you today in hopes that I myself find peace in this and that others who relate or don't and could see that this is indeed a dangerous path.... but I am just like every other person and I fall into my sin.... but I want to be better than that... I don't want to lose, I refuse.. Jesus didn't give up so why should I? Even if I am not him, I just want to be free, to be saved... I don't want to use Jesus as an excuse to sin. That's weakness in my eyes, I don't think Jesus died so that you could Sin, and even now I tell myself that, but I am still just another sinner regardless of that.

and I wish I wouldn't fail....
Click to expand...
Hi, it's Andrew right? I just saw your previous post. Anyway, I'm Lily; it's nice to meet you.

I wish that I didn't fall short so many times either. It really does feel like a losing battle, I agree. But what I know is that when you find yourself falling short, take it to God. Pray for His mercy and forgiveness. He promises that He hears us when we cry out to Him and bring our struggles and sins before Him.

He can strengthen us to overcome sin; we just have to keep surrendering it all to Him and turning to Him for help. He promises He will save and restore those who repent and seek Him. So, Andrew, keep seeking God and ask Him for His strength, wisdom, and most of all, peace.

David, from the Bible, fell many times. But he seeked God, and was restored and forgiven.

I do believe God is working in you now, because you heard your conscience warning you to run from sin. It's when our conscience is silent that we should worry. Keep it informed of what is right by reading and dwelling on God's Word. And pray to God for wisdom.

I pray that God will guide, protect, and grow you. :)
 
S

She_is_Legendary

Well-known member
#6
May 30, 2019
1,378
1,139
113
#6
Drewandbob12 said:
I wish I wouldn't fail to be perfect and that I could undo many of the things I've done in my life. I truly hate that.

You might be wondering what now? What's going on this time with this person and I suppose I do no good but keeping it to myself so I'll explain.

When you get lonely you get very much desperate, and even I can't deny that. I have yet to master myself out of loneliness and that's actually part of the reason I came here more recently again. I want to change for the better of myself and for God.... but at the same time I am a fool. I have been trying to get a girlfriend for the longest of time because well I want that family, that happiness that love.... but I hate waiting and I think that these dating sites have taken my soul because the dopamine they produce is overwhelming.

Anyway I say I am a fool because a girl came along and well loneliness... she asked for some money I gave her some money and I gave it to her, not at first but after a while I would give in. We were planning on meeting because I wanted to hangout, which is code for I actually wanted sex but didn't want to say it out loud, and she is what I would call a Escort. Well I am truly a fool.

I didn't me her as I actually just blocked her finally because something in me told myself to run. "Run far away, keep running please, don't do this, you're better than this" and the bible quote that popped in my head "Flee from Sexually immorality". I just couldn't do it.

Personally right now I feel like I deserve the bottom of Hell, and should be executed for my evil. I just want to be free from my sin, but it always feels like a losing war. Sin pushed up from behind with a counterattack and I'm caught off guard on the battlefield. I share this with you today in hopes that I myself find peace in this and that others who relate or don't and could see that this is indeed a dangerous path.... but I am just like every other person and I fall into my sin.... but I want to be better than that... I don't want to lose, I refuse.. Jesus didn't give up so why should I? Even if I am not him, I just want to be free, to be saved... I don't want to use Jesus as an excuse to sin. That's weakness in my eyes, I don't think Jesus died so that you could Sin, and even now I tell myself that, but I am still just another sinner regardless of that.

and I wish I wouldn't fail....
Click to expand...
The way I see it, failing is kinda a good thing. at least you KNOW it was a sin you were committing and your heart told you what you were about to do. The Holy spirit within you is what told you to “stop“, you obeyed and repented right away. That’s a good sign, you recognized it, you got away from it and repented. Some folks don’t even know to do that, they do whatever and realize afterwards what they have done and feel like the lowest life of the planet. But the fact you KNOW what you did, you saved Yourself from being with that woman.. do you know how strong of a Godly man you are?? most men couldn’t do what you did, especially if They know Christ.. i commend you for what you did.. brave. strong, courageous. You are a better person than you give Yourself credit for, no matter what you do, or have done.. Christ loves you more and more each day. Always remember that.

God Bless Brother 😊💜
 
J

justinhelton1213

New member
#7
Jun 2, 2018
26
8
3
#7
Here are a couple scriptures for you to ponder

You say that sin just dominates basically, you want to be free from sins power because you are a child of God, from what I am reading here. Here are some truths found in the Word that shows you exactly who you are. The enemy does NOT want you to believe this and would rather you fall for the lie that sin is still the issue. What if I were to tell you that sin is not imputed to you any more? What if I told you that Jesus took the punishment for your sins and sat down at the right hand of God?

What if...You are PERFECT forever...Sanctified Forever and there is nothing that change this because forever means...FOREVER

What if I told you that you have peace with God?
You died with Christ and are risen in Christ, meaning that you died unto sin and are alive unto God.. just like Jesus! Romans 6:10-11

Sin shall no longer have dominion over you for you are not under the law but under grace Romans 6:14

As Jesus IS so are you IN THIS WORLD...1 John 4:17

You are a saint who sometimes sins, this does not make sin ok...but we must understand who we really are in Christ so we can live out these truths of being free from sin.

In your mind, you are not free from sin, thats what you are telling yourself.....but the truth is, YOU ARE FREE from sin through your death to sin in Christ! Romans 6.
 
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