Are there single Christian girls in Finland ?

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tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#821
Mar 13, 2014
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#821
RodB651 said:
Are there single Christian girls in Finland?

After 41 pages of discussion, I sure hope so!
if not, maybe Sweden or Norway could help a brother out.
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There was at least one who joined this site a few weeks ago. Wrote a post of this thread to but was generally disregarded by the OP.
 
Magenta

Magenta

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#824
Jul 3, 2015
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#824
Kauko said:
Ok, I read some pages and realized the message you want to give me. .......... You say, if I cant find a virtuous Christian girl, is because something is definitely wrong with me and Im the only problem. Not to say I have nothing to fix at all, but you talk like if everybody else was perfect, even the unbeliever tattooed girls who sleep with 5 different men everyday. .......... Summarizing, you say my problems are: - Alcoholism (which Im fighting now) - Lack of love and respect for others - Lack of attention and comprehension - Lack of trust and self-esteem - Wrong attitudes to relationships - No willingness to change

Well, so lets suppose all of these statements are 100 percent true, and that God made some kind of miracle on me and turned me into a better person. So what now ? The girl I want should be approaching my door wishing to develop a relationship with the new man I became in, according to your line of speech. And well, what if I still dont see this supposed girl ? What if I am still unable to find the girl I deserve now that I changed ? Because my environment will not change regardless of how I do change myself. My environment will stay the same if not change for the worse. What makes you think my around is waiting for me to change ? The world will be the same. Finland will continue to lose its religious identity. Girls here will continue to be unbelieving and promiscuous. NOTHING in my around will be better. There are NO indications I will find the girl of my life after I turn into something different. The sad reality is still there. Theres NO way I can find the girl I seek after I make a change on myself. It will be just as hard as it has been in my previous years, if not harder. And again, I DONT WANT to live single for the rest of my life ! Theres NO GUARANTEE I will find what I want once I change myself. This is what I have been denouncing since the beginning of the thread !
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So what now? This question can be reasonably answered by surmising that in becoming a better person, your wisdom has also increased at least enough to allow you see the error of your ways in relentlessly pursuing -even if only in your fantasy life- a dream girl you insist does not exist in the first place, which will in turn allow your attention to shift to the people who are in your life regardless of whether they are suitable mate material or not, that you may begin ministering to them in response to their needs rather than constantly looking to have your own needs met.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#825
Mar 13, 2014
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#825
Kauko said:
Ok, I read some pages and realized the message you want to give me.

You say, if I cant find a virtuous Christian girl, is because something is definitely wrong with me and Im the only problem. Not to say I have nothing to fix at all, but you talk like if everybody else was perfect, even the unbeliever tattooed girls who sleep with 5 different men everyday.

Summarizing, you say my problems are:

- Alcoholism (which Im fighting now)
- Lack of love and respect for others
- Lack of attention and comprehension
- Lack of trust and self-esteem
- Wrong attitudes to relationships
- No willingness to change

Well, so lets suppose all of these statements are 100 percent true, and that God made some kind of miracle on me and turned me into a better person. So what now ? The girl I want should be approaching my door wishing to develop a relationship with the new man I became in, according to your line of speech. And well, what if I still dont see this supposed girl ? What if I am still unable to find the girl I deserve now that I changed ?
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Rather than approaching your door you should be assertive and approach her door. Regardless of whether or not you change does not mean that you deserve this girl. If that were true than this girl would have to deserve you too. Nobody is perfect, my counsel is to seek help for your drinking problem first. You already have a stable job so that's a definite plus. I wouldn't want to be with a promiscuous woman either regardless if she is a Christian or has tattoos. You may not see this supposed girl unless you take a more active approach to finding her.
 
Kauko

Kauko

Active member
#826
Jul 14, 2021
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#826
Magenta said:
So what now? This question can be reasonably answered by surmising that in becoming a better person, your wisdom has also increased at least enough to allow you see the error of your ways in relentlessly pursuing -even if only in your fantasy life- a dream girl you insist does not exist in the first place, which will in turn allow your attention to shift to the people who are in your life regardless of whether they are suitable mate material or not, that you may begin ministering to them in response to their needs rather than constantly looking to have your own needs met.
Click to expand...
But I cant be single, I cant be !!!
 
R

RodB651

Well-known member
#829
Feb 11, 2021
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#829
A few men in the Bible found their wife by hanging out near wells. It could be an option?
 
Kauko

Kauko

Active member
#830
Jul 14, 2021
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#830
tourist said:
Try checking out the local library if there is one close by. She's probably perusing the periodicals.
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I could do this but I doubt this will work. I have also searched in libraries with no results.
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#831
Jul 3, 2015
59,931
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#831
Kauko said:
But I cant be single, I cant be !!!
Click to expand...
That is odd, because you are single and claim you have been single for years.

Is being single suddenly going to kill you somehow? I seriously doubt it.

So what now? Change your attitude and expectations.

How stubborn you remain in your current attitude will make it all the
more difficult and commensurately increase your suffering as well.

You can be author of your own suffering for the rest of your life if you wish.
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#833
Mar 26, 2014
4,425
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#833
Kauko said:
Ok, I read some pages and realized the message you want to give me.

You say, if I cant find a virtuous Christian girl, is because something is definitely wrong with me and Im the only problem. Not to say I have nothing to fix at all, but you talk like if everybody else was perfect, even the unbeliever tattooed girls who sleep with 5 different men everyday.

Summarizing, you say my problems are:

- Alcoholism (which Im fighting now)
- Lack of love and respect for others
- Lack of attention and comprehension
- Lack of trust and self-esteem
- Wrong attitudes to relationships
- No willingness to change

Well, so lets suppose all of these statements are 100 percent true, and that God made some kind of miracle on me and turned me into a better person. So what now ? The girl I want should be approaching my door wishing to develop a relationship with the new man I became in, according to your line of speech. And well, what if I still dont see this supposed girl ? What if I am still unable to find the girl I deserve now that I changed ? Because my environment will not change regardless of how I do change myself. My environment will stay the same if not change for the worse. What makes you think my around is waiting for me to change ? The world will be the same. Finland will continue to lose its religious identity. Girls here will continue to be unbelieving and promiscuous. NOTHING in my around will be better. There are NO indications I will find the girl of my life after I turn into something different. The sad reality is still there. Theres NO way I can find the girl I seek after I make a change on myself. It will be just as hard as it has been in my previous years, if not harder. And again, I DONT WANT to live single for the rest of my life ! Theres NO GUARANTEE I will find what I want once I change myself. This is what I have been denouncing since the beginning of the thread !
Click to expand...

Work on step 1 and when you've accomplished that God will probably send someone to let you know what step 2 is. But with the attitudes you've displayed so far, even if we had the answers as to how to magically find the perfect Chrsitian partner, we wouldn't tell you now because all evidence points to you'd try to skip step 1 and rush to step 2 and make some nice Christian girl absolutely miserable.

You can want to get married, but that's no guarantee that you'll ever get married. So your options are 1) start making positive changes, doing what you can to enjoy life, and yes maybe finding a way to get out into environments where you are more likely to meet eligible Christian ladies (church, volunteering to help others, etc) or 2) sit around feeling miserable and doing nothing but whining about how much you wish your life were different but it's so impossible to change anything that I can't even get motivated to try. It's entirely your choice which of those two options will define how you spend the next 20 or more years of your life, you don't need a woman or the promise of a woman to make that choice.
 
Kauko

Kauko

Active member
#835
Jul 14, 2021
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#835
Magenta said:
That is odd, because you are single and claim you have been single for years.

Is being single suddenly going to kill you somehow? I seriously doubt it.

So what now? Change your attitude and expectations.

How stubborn you remain in your current attitude will make it all the
more difficult and commensurately increase your suffering as well.

You can be author of your own suffering for the rest of your life if you wish.
Click to expand...
But its harder and harder everyday. Its like hiking a mountain that turns more vertical the higher I hike endlessly.

I will end destroyed internally this way.
 
Encouragement

Encouragement

Well-known member
#836
Aug 25, 2020
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#836
I can't believe the same discussion is STILL going on..This threa started when I was 5 years old...now iam and 87 and its STILL GOING ON..
and hes STILL not getting it
and others are STILL repeating the same thing..😯
Everyone must be feeling dizzy going around in so many circles..🤪🤪🤪
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#837
Mar 13, 2014
42,571
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69
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#837
Kauko said:
I could do this but I doubt this will work. I have also searched in libraries with no results.
Click to expand...
Search again. She is probably going to renew her books. Reading is a wholesome activity. Well, generally speaking depending what you are reading.
 
Encouragement

Encouragement

Well-known member
#838
Aug 25, 2020
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#838
Kauko said:
But its harder and harder everyday. Its like hiking a mountain that turns more vertical the higher I hike.

I will end destroyed internally this way.
Click to expand...
That's EXACTLY what it feels like being on this thread..⛰⛰⛰🏔🏔🏔🤪😯😯
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#839
Jul 3, 2015
59,931
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#839
Kauko said:
But its harder and harder everyday. Its like hiking a mountain that turns more vertical the higher I hike.

I will end destroyed internally this way.
Click to expand...
There are other topographies to traverse.

You simply don't want to see hem regardless of how plainly they have otherwise been revealed to you.

You are stuck being the recalcitrant child having a temper tantrum.
 
Kauko

Kauko

Active member
#840
Jul 14, 2021
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#840
Magenta said:
There are other topographies to traverse.

You simply don't want to regardless of how plainly it has otherwise been revealed to you.
Click to expand...
What ones ?
 
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