I realised the Truth this year. Ever since I've tried to understand what that means.
Felt so in love with Jesus, had the Time of my Life. Then my old patterns started to continue- and now I feel so confused and lost.
Your experience is common. I had the same thing. God will kind of kick start us on our walk with Him. Then He asks us to walk by faith. Also, we have an enemy who wants to keep us in confusion and rob us of our joy. The Joy of the Lord is our strength. Satan cannot undo our salvation, but he can keep us ineffective if we listen to him.
God wants us to realise our helplessness without Him. The Christian life is something we've never experienced before. It is a life of trust and obedience. We have to rely on something outside of ourselves, maybe for the first time ever. Take God at His word. He will never lie, never let you down, never abandon you and always love you. You can trust Him with every aspect of your life. The more you let hism lead you and guide you, the better for you.
The Christian life is a battle. Satan opposes us and we have the self of the soul that wants to be independent of God. We need to resist both. The victory is ours. We have to learn how to live it out day by day. Hard? Yes. Impossible? If we try by ourselves, also yes. But we can trust God to bring us through triumphant in whatever we face. His grace is sufficient all the time in every situation.