The Girl Before And After!

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K

Karlon

Well-known member
#181
Mar 8, 2023
3,303
1,519
113
#181
GaryA said:
Let me tell you a true story...

At a family gathering, my older brother made an offhand remark about his wife being overweight - to which, my grandmother said to him:

"Now, Scott - you married her that way!"

(not his real name)

There was nothing he could say to that - it was true - she was definitely overweight when he married her.

I decided right-then-and-there that I would never allow myself to marry "a fat woman" (to put it succinctly).

That was many years ago. But, I still have every intent to hold myself to the promise I made to myself that day.

Now - if I married a woman today - we might both be fat-and-happy sitting in our rocking chairs on the front porch many years later...

Nonetheless: "That would be then but this is now."

I never said I would stop loving a woman if she gained some weight. But, I will say that I do not want the relationship to start out that way.

And, that is one of the points you were making - that [most] men do not "look for" [a large woman] to start a romantic relationship with.

And, it is normal - God intended for all of us to be 'thin-and-trim' - it is the healthy state of the human body.

It is perfectly natural and normal for a man to desire to have and "look for" a 'thin-and-trim' woman for a wife.

You posed this:


And then answered it with this:


And then illustrated it with this:



As far as I am concerned, you were simply "telling it like it is"...

~

I would like to suggest that it would have been better if you had started your initial post with the story about the bikers rather than just writing about the end result of your thoughts on the experience. You know - give some context - so that folks might better be able to understand where you are coming from...
Click to expand...
i appreciate your true, diplomatic & simplistic analyzation which is point on. i have always been someone to say what i mean & mean what i say in the fewest words. i'm like the guy at the business meeting that is the quietest then i speak 1 sentence & everyone looks with amazement & says, "how did you think of that one"? no, i'm not a big shot business man. but i am a good idea man. so in all this girls, please never think i am badgering, deriding or disparaging women, because i am not. on this Christian site, more than anyplace i know, i would think that we all can converse on semi-personal issues with the utmost professionalism, kindness, honesty & compassion. there may even be men & women on CC who trust each other enough to talk about quite personal subjects, after all, men need women's point of view & vise versa. GaryA, you speak as a pro psychologist! it is refreshing to read a post like yours that is just plain simply honest & true. in america, for too long, lot's of people have allowed themselves to become weak willed partly because of the constant catering to "feeling sorry". i assent to your suggestion about the initial sentence of the bikers. so girls, please understand the truth here without any implications of anything not in context. & girls, know this: i had the worst time finding dates because of my thick glasses i wore. i was born legally blind. guys didn't even want to be my friends. they were embarrassed to hang around with me. i know all to well & for to long what it is to be rejected. & you also know my brothers & i were constantly beaten & rejected at home. praise the Lord that lot's of us here learn from others.
 
K

Karlon

Well-known member
#182
Mar 8, 2023
3,303
1,519
113
#182
GaryA said:
Let me tell you a true story...

At a family gathering, my older brother made an offhand remark about his wife being overweight - to which, my grandmother said to him:

"Now, Scott - you married her that way!"

(not his real name)

There was nothing he could say to that - it was true - she was definitely overweight when he married her.

I decided right-then-and-there that I would never allow myself to marry "a fat woman" (to put it succinctly).

That was many years ago. But, I still have every intent to hold myself to the promise I made to myself that day.

Now - if I married a woman today - we might both be fat-and-happy sitting in our rocking chairs on the front porch many years later...

Nonetheless: "That would be then but this is now."

I never said I would stop loving a woman if she gained some weight. But, I will say that I do not want the relationship to start out that way.

And, that is one of the points you were making - that [most] men do not "look for" [a large woman] to start a romantic relationship with.

And, it is normal - God intended for all of us to be 'thin-and-trim' - it is the healthy state of the human body.

It is perfectly natural and normal for a man to desire to have and "look for" a 'thin-and-trim' woman for a wife.

You posed this:


And then answered it with this:


And then illustrated it with this:



As far as I am concerned, you were simply "telling it like it is"...

~

I would like to suggest that it would have been better if you had started your initial post with the story about the bikers rather than just writing about the end result of your thoughts on the experience. You know - give some context - so that folks might better be able to understand where you are coming from...
Click to expand...
i appreciate your true, diplomatic & simplistic analyzation which is point on. i have always been someone to say what i mean & mean what i say in the fewest words. i'm like the guy at the business meeting that is the quietest then i speak 1 sentence & everyone looks with amazement & says, "how did you think of that one"? no, i'm not a big shot business man. but i am a good idea man. so in all this girls, please never think i am badgering, deriding or disparaging women, because i am not. on this Christian site, more than anyplace i know, i would think that we all can converse on semi-personal issues with the utmost professionalism, kindness, honesty & compassion. there may even be men & women on CC who trust each other enough to talk about quite personal subjects, after all, men need women's point of view & vise versa. GaryA, you speak as a pro psychologist! it is refreshing to read a post like yours that is just plain simply honest & true. in america, for too long, lot's of people have allowed themselves to become weak willed partly because of the constant catering to "feeling sorry". i assent to your suggestion about the initial sentence of the bikers. so girls, please understand the truth here without any implications of anything not in context. & girls, know this: i had the worst time finding dates because of my thick glasses i wore. i was born legally blind. guys didn't even want to be my friends. they were embarrassed to hang around with me. i know all to well & for to long what it is to be rejected. & you also know my brothers & i were constantly beaten & rejected at home. praise the Lord that lot's of us here learn from others.
 
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