Age Difference
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You can date people of any (legal) age. Is it always a good idea to go to the extreme with it? Probably not. But 10 years is fully reasonable. My own personal limit is no younger than 10 years below me. And, when younger I dated women 10 years above me.
Of course some age differences may be less advisable than others. 20 and 30 may be a bigger maturity/experience gap than 30 and 40, for example.
But technically there is no official rule that limits age. Other than legal limits.
Of course some age differences may be less advisable than others. 20 and 30 may be a bigger maturity/experience gap than 30 and 40, for example.
But technically there is no official rule that limits age. Other than legal limits.
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Yes, my dad’s wife is 10 years younger than him and they have been married for nearly two decades, along with two children who are now in college.
i’m currently dating someone who is 8 years older than me and we seem to work out just fine but I would wait until God shows you who that person is. He has a way of ninjistuing someone into your life that is perfect for you…as long as you wait patiently for it to happen.
Some people just choose the first person that walks in front of them or is in close proximity. Last thing you want is a relationship of convenience. That’s how future husbands and wives end up becoming roommates, instead of partners.
i’m currently dating someone who is 8 years older than me and we seem to work out just fine but I would wait until God shows you who that person is. He has a way of ninjistuing someone into your life that is perfect for you…as long as you wait patiently for it to happen.
Some people just choose the first person that walks in front of them or is in close proximity. Last thing you want is a relationship of convenience. That’s how future husbands and wives end up becoming roommates, instead of partners.
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Most of the secular entertainment industry has issues with pedophiles.
From Elvis Presley to Tom Hanks. Puff Diddy is just the latest. Ask Dolly Parton....
The movie Blue Lagoon starring Brooke Shields was actually illegal to make as she was underage (14)....nobody seemed to care. Very popular movie in its day....everyone watched it. Even shown on television.
From Elvis Presley to Tom Hanks. Puff Diddy is just the latest. Ask Dolly Parton....
The movie Blue Lagoon starring Brooke Shields was actually illegal to make as she was underage (14)....nobody seemed to care. Very popular movie in its day....everyone watched it. Even shown on television.
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I thought you've mentioned that your own wife is 17 years younger than you are?
Of course, when you meet in life is key.
The guys who ask me out now are often 15 years younger.
I'm glad it's now that I'm older and not borderline inappropriate.
I was once asked out by a 21-year-old several years ago... But I don't want to turn into Madonna! 🤣
Of course, when you meet in life is key.
The guys who ask me out now are often 15 years younger.
I'm glad it's now that I'm older and not borderline inappropriate.
I was once asked out by a 21-year-old several years ago... But I don't want to turn into Madonna! 🤣
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There are many Christians who believe you cannot even date. In other words, they make a distinction between casual dating and courtship which is purposely only dating people you see a potential future with (marriage material).
If we read the Bible carefully, then I think that we can pretty safely conclude that God is okay with marriages where the couple are more than 10 years apart in age, but we need to practically consider some potentially negative affects of such a union.
For example, although none of us know the time of our death, if the husband is substantially older than the wife, then he might wind up dying first. If he is the sole or main provider for the family, then that could be an issue. Also, if there are any children that come out of that marriage, then they might lose their father at an early age if he is substantially older than their mother.
On the other hand, if the wife is substantially older, then she might lose her ability to bear children when her younger husband might desire some or more.
Also, if the marriage is based a lot on how your spouse looks, if he or she age quicker, then the eye of the younger person might start to roam.
I know that you mentioned dating and not marriage, but if you are dating with the hope of marriage, then these are some practical things to consider, and the examples that I gave are by no means exhaustive.
If we read the Bible carefully, then I think that we can pretty safely conclude that God is okay with marriages where the couple are more than 10 years apart in age, but we need to practically consider some potentially negative affects of such a union.
For example, although none of us know the time of our death, if the husband is substantially older than the wife, then he might wind up dying first. If he is the sole or main provider for the family, then that could be an issue. Also, if there are any children that come out of that marriage, then they might lose their father at an early age if he is substantially older than their mother.
On the other hand, if the wife is substantially older, then she might lose her ability to bear children when her younger husband might desire some or more.
Also, if the marriage is based a lot on how your spouse looks, if he or she age quicker, then the eye of the younger person might start to roam.
I know that you mentioned dating and not marriage, but if you are dating with the hope of marriage, then these are some practical things to consider, and the examples that I gave are by no means exhaustive.
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Hello. Thanks for the response. These points you raised are definitely valid. I would admit that some of them haven't crossed my mind. I never thought of the looks aspect because I am more particular about personality and yeah I definitely always think about the death factor and that's scary but not because of the financial aspect but for the mourning and being lonely. Although no one knows anyone's dying day but it is generally assumed that the older you are the more likely you are to die first. Personally I don't think I can date or marry anyone significantly younger than me. I guess it is a cultural thing for me and I'm just so used to it that I don't think I can give it a try. Where I am from, the men are expected to be older than the woman but then again, I can't marry someone more than 12 to 15 years older than me, that would be too odd😁
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It's fine for men to have older women but not so much for a woman to have a much older man. Men attracted to much younger women shows immaturity. It's like seeing a 20 year old man still in grade school, it looks like a bad joke. Unless he's supervising them like a parent or mentor. A younger man can protect and provide for an older woman and older women are more responsible so she can help him, but an older man with a much younger woman is likely manipulation, especially in this wild day and age. Men that are attracted to much younger women are likely to have a really odd deviant personality. Men who are attracted to much younger women are usually the worst kind of men. They only like women their age if they aren't very wise and women who are very insecure because they are easy to manipulate. The older they are the older the age gap can be.
We should all be more particular about personality (and godliness) than looks, but that rarely ever seems to be the case. Also, the fact that the death factor is scary because of mourning the loss of a loved one as opposed to any financial reason seems to indicate that your heart is in the right place (we cannot serve God and mammon).
As far as it being odd to marry someone more than 12 to 15 years older than you is concerned, if we pay close attention to details, then the Bible does seem to indicate that such age gaps have existed within the confines of marriage in the past.
Abraham was only 10 years older than Sarah.
Gen 17:17
Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall a child be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
By the time Sarah was 90, she was no longer able to bear children naturally.
Gen 18:11
Now Abraham and Sarah were old and well stricken in age; and it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
At that age, Sarah needed the supernatural help of the Holy Spirit to conceive.
Heb 11:11
Through faith also Sara herself received strength to conceive seed, and was delivered of a child when she was past age, because she judged him faithful who had promised.
The word strength, in the original Greek, is dynamis, or the same word used to describe the power of the Holy Spirit from on high that Jesus' disciples received on the day of Pentecost.
Luk 24:49
And, behold, I send the promise of my Father upon you: but tarry ye in the city of Jerusalem, until ye be endued with power from on high.
If we assume that all women in that day lost the ability to conceive naturally by the time that they were 90 years old, then we need to consider what happened when Abraham remarried after Sarah died.
Abraham buried Sarah his wife (Gen. 23:19) when he was old, and well stricken in age (Gen. 24:1). After Sarah died, Abraham not only remarried, but he fathered more children.
Gen 25:1
Then again Abraham took a wife, and her name was Keturah.
Gen 25:2
And she bare him Zimran, and Jokshan, and Medan, and Midian, and Ishbak, and Shuah.
Assuming that Keturah was younger than 90, because Sarah had lost the ability to conceive naturally by that age, there appears to have been a rather large age gap between Abraham and Keturah. Also, in this particular case, he may have chosen to marry a younger woman for the sake of having more children which is something that an older woman seemingly would not have been able to provide him with.
Also, if we quickly look at the marital relationship between Boaz and Ruth, then we should consider what we are about to read.
Rth 3:9
And he said, Who art thou? And she answered, I am Ruth thine handmaid: spread therefore thy skirt over thine handmaid; for thou art a near kinsman.
Rth 3:10
And he said, Blessed be thou of the LORD, my daughter: for thou hast shewed more kindness in the latter end than at the beginning, inasmuch as thou followedst not young men, whether poor or rich.
Ruth showed kindness to Boaz by not following after young men, and the implication is that she was considerably younger than Boaz.
We see something similar with King Ahasuerus and Esther.
Est 2:1
After these things, when the wrath of king Ahasuerus was appeased, he remembered Vashti, and what she had done, and what was decreed against her.
Est 2:2
Then said the king's servants that ministered unto him, Let there be fair young virgins sought for the king:
Est 2:3
And let the king appoint officers in all the provinces of his kingdom, that they may gather together all the fair young virgins unto Shushan the palace, to the house of the women, unto the custody of Hege the king's chamberlain, keeper of the women; and let their things for purification be given them:
Est 2:4
And let the maiden which pleaseth the king be queen instead of Vashti. And the thing pleased the king; and he did so.
Through historical records, it can be proven, with a good amount of certainty, that King Ahasuerus was at least in his upper thirties at that time, and probably somewhere in his mid to upper forties at that time. Contrast his age with the ages of the young virgins who were sought out to be his wife, and there was probably an age difference of 20 to 30 years between him and Esther.
These are just some examples of what I alluded to in my first response when I mentioned reading the Bible carefully.
As far as it being odd to marry someone more than 12 to 15 years older than you is concerned, if we pay close attention to details, then the Bible does seem to indicate that such age gaps have existed within the confines of marriage in the past.
Abraham was only 10 years older than Sarah.
Gen 17:17
Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall a child be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
By the time Sarah was 90, she was no longer able to bear children naturally.
Gen 18:11
Now Abraham and Sarah were old and well stricken in age; and it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
At that age, Sarah needed the supernatural help of the Holy Spirit to conceive.
Heb 11:11
Through faith also Sara herself received strength to conceive seed, and was delivered of a child when she was past age, because she judged him faithful who had promised.
The word strength, in the original Greek, is dynamis, or the same word used to describe the power of the Holy Spirit from on high that Jesus' disciples received on the day of Pentecost.
Luk 24:49
And, behold, I send the promise of my Father upon you: but tarry ye in the city of Jerusalem, until ye be endued with power from on high.
If we assume that all women in that day lost the ability to conceive naturally by the time that they were 90 years old, then we need to consider what happened when Abraham remarried after Sarah died.
Abraham buried Sarah his wife (Gen. 23:19) when he was old, and well stricken in age (Gen. 24:1). After Sarah died, Abraham not only remarried, but he fathered more children.
Gen 25:1
Then again Abraham took a wife, and her name was Keturah.
Gen 25:2
And she bare him Zimran, and Jokshan, and Medan, and Midian, and Ishbak, and Shuah.
Assuming that Keturah was younger than 90, because Sarah had lost the ability to conceive naturally by that age, there appears to have been a rather large age gap between Abraham and Keturah. Also, in this particular case, he may have chosen to marry a younger woman for the sake of having more children which is something that an older woman seemingly would not have been able to provide him with.
Also, if we quickly look at the marital relationship between Boaz and Ruth, then we should consider what we are about to read.
Rth 3:9
And he said, Who art thou? And she answered, I am Ruth thine handmaid: spread therefore thy skirt over thine handmaid; for thou art a near kinsman.
Rth 3:10
And he said, Blessed be thou of the LORD, my daughter: for thou hast shewed more kindness in the latter end than at the beginning, inasmuch as thou followedst not young men, whether poor or rich.
Ruth showed kindness to Boaz by not following after young men, and the implication is that she was considerably younger than Boaz.
We see something similar with King Ahasuerus and Esther.
Est 2:1
After these things, when the wrath of king Ahasuerus was appeased, he remembered Vashti, and what she had done, and what was decreed against her.
Est 2:2
Then said the king's servants that ministered unto him, Let there be fair young virgins sought for the king:
Est 2:3
And let the king appoint officers in all the provinces of his kingdom, that they may gather together all the fair young virgins unto Shushan the palace, to the house of the women, unto the custody of Hege the king's chamberlain, keeper of the women; and let their things for purification be given them:
Est 2:4
And let the maiden which pleaseth the king be queen instead of Vashti. And the thing pleased the king; and he did so.
Through historical records, it can be proven, with a good amount of certainty, that King Ahasuerus was at least in his upper thirties at that time, and probably somewhere in his mid to upper forties at that time. Contrast his age with the ages of the young virgins who were sought out to be his wife, and there was probably an age difference of 20 to 30 years between him and Esther.
These are just some examples of what I alluded to in my first response when I mentioned reading the Bible carefully.
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She still is 17 yrs younger....hasn't changed. As I was graduating HS she was in diapers and bottle fed.
However....when we met and began dating she had her Masters Degree for several years and was in her career of choice. (Teaching Middle School)
Currently she works in Cancer research.
So....I have not exactly robbed the cradle by some marrying some young, dumb child. I just married well and up.
However....when we met and began dating she had her Masters Degree for several years and was in her career of choice. (Teaching Middle School)
Currently she works in Cancer research.
So....I have not exactly robbed the cradle by some marrying some young, dumb child. I just married well and up.
It is not a silly question, and I do not mind you asking it. No, I am not a pastor. I am simply someone who takes the things of God very seriously because both life and death are very serious matters, and someone who always prays for the Holy Spirit to give me understanding when I am reading or listening to God's word. Not only for my own sake or for my own walk with the Lord, but also so that I might be best equipped to help others. You don't ever need to apologize for being curious either. I am the curious type myself.
