Yahoo! (Not the company) My computer couldn't connect to the printer and God and I fixed it.
Yesterday I spent hours trying the printer tech support and the general internet till I got disillusioned with hearing the same tips repeatedly that didn't work. I asked God for help and today I stumbled upon the solution that no one else got close to. In fact they didn't even identify the problem fully, which wasn't just about the printer appearing offline, it was about my laptop's inability to recognize anything on the network within our home (the internet was fine).
Long story short, I ended up resetting the network adaptors to factory settings, restarted, and my computer woke-up happy.